Life is hard - overdose -cry for help where to go now?

[CanisLupus]

My beautiful daughter only 23 yrs old suffered her TBI 3yrs 8 months ago. She is very determined and insisted on living independently in her own rental 2 months ago and over 2 hrs drive away. It’s been hard we’ve needed to go up and support every weekend as she said she couldn’t cope although she was doing really well but could not see believe this. Her anxiety went through the roof and she took an attempted overdose and drank on that evening far too much. We struggle to know what to do next, she won’t go back to the rental as in her eyes that’s a bad place and it’s to blame, but I can see the cycle happening again and no we don’t have any support she has in the past been discharged by 2 neuro psychiatrists after only one meeting she presents very well if you meet her just once so frustrating. She is now in a new area and on the waiting list for the community TBI teams support. If I knew what therapy coping mechanisms she needed I would try and pay. But she also lacks insight and more from the TBI so it’s almost impossible to … oh I don’t know, support help her understand why routine is good etc etc. she fixates and it’s never her fault.

[Painting-girl]

Sorry to hear this CL. Do you know what triggered it?

Is she still taking the antidepressants? Ideally she needs talking therapy and possibly antidepressants - worth trying different ones if sertraline isn't helping. What does her GP say? Can she see neuropsychologist - mine was incredibly helpful.

I'll be at the four year mark in July this year, and have begun to achieve acceptance by and large, but it isn't always easy by any means - so it must be very scary to be dealing with it in her twenties,

I'm not sure how she would manage on her own to be honest, I still struggle, and I've years of cooking and coping strategies to draw upon

May be worth you ringing the Headway helpline in office hours for a chat tomorrow about some options? Tel [phone].

[cat3]

The right SSRi can turn your daughter's life around but it has to be compatible with her own brain chemistry.

It took me almost 12 months of trial and error to find one which didn't have adverse effects. On the 6th trial I found the one which I've relied on ever since and which has freed me from the depression and dark thoughts for the past 30 years.

If the Sertraline hasn't made a positive difference by now then it isn't the one for her. Ask your GP for a change and, if that doesn't help life her mood within a couple of months then another change will be needed.

Chemistry mismatch is the main drawback of SSRis and often gives them a bad name ; persevering through the trial period is essential for assimilation to take place.

Do you think this could be an issue worth lookin into ?

Best wishes, Cat x

[CanisLupus in reply to cat3]

Thank you she on fluoxetine at the moment I think, difficult to know as she’s doesn't tell me

[cat3 in reply to CanisLupus]

Tell your daughter she needs to keep a record of how the Fluoxetine (or any subsequent antidepressant) affects her on a daily basis.

Whoever is prescribing the meds should be monitoring her and available for advice, especially since her suicide attempt. ....is that her GP ?

Is there a friend of your daughter's who would keep you informed of her welfare and state of mind if asked to do so ?

[Pairofboots]

Hi, I'm not sure where medication has been broached by the previous replies. As it has been mentioned, SSRI medication is a first line treatment for depression. Cat is right about finding the right one, but sometimes they need to be taken in combination with different SSRIs, or other groups of medication. There is a risk with this type of drug, that there is a slight increase in suicidal, or parasuicidal tendancies in the early stages of increasing the dose to a therapeutic level. This may have been the case with your daughter? This type of risk behaviour needs close supervision. As you say your daughter presents well, but lacks insight. This is fairly common with depression. It is important that carer's have input around care plans, as she may not be able to express risk, or as I did, mask true feelings. A neuro-psychologist can help with insight, and to build a picture of your daughter's needs, but this is a long process, and measures may need to be in place to protect your daughter until the she come to understand, and, or, the medication, and therapy has good effect. Insight can be something that is not achieved in relation to depression, as the medication/therapy improves someone's mental state, so they get the feeling that when the medication works therapeutically, they feel cured, and therefore don't need treatment. Treatment can take many years. As a rule of thumb, it takes roughly twice the period of time to treat that the person has experience depression and not successfully treated. This probably sounds bleak, but depression is a serious illness, often underestimated, and far more insidious than just being really fed up. I would do a disservice if I didn't explain this. I wish your daughter, and yourself well 🍀

[CanisLupus in reply to Pairofboots]

It’s so difficult when someone lacks insight and consequences, we seem to be in a yearly cycle of her crashing although these are getting less severe as the 1st resulted in her being sectioned so sad, and so hard to keep on going and fighting for appointment etc when she had no idea the invisible scaffolding and what we do. 3 1/2 years down the line hubby and myself are both needing to give up work.

[Pairofboots in reply to CanisLupus]

Giving up work is going to be a whole different challenge, financially, as well as getting used to eachother 24/7. It can be distressing to section someone, and not necessarily the best place therapeutically for someone with a brain injury, although it might be a necessary evil to keep your daughter safe. Before my head hiccup, I was a RN (MH), so now I can understand both sides of the coin. I thought I was immune to the curse of depression, but thankfully I had good support from my GP and the rehab team. It took six or seven years to stabilise me, and to find the right cocktail of medication, along with numerous crisis. But there is hope that there is the right treatment for your daughter, the best support is from a neuro-psychologist and a neuro-psychiatrist. Don't get tied up with the titles, they specialise in brain injuries, and approach depressive illness with that in mind. The treatment is the same, but often because of the injury, there are complications due to insight as you mentioned, and that the brain has rerouted some of its functions. I have had four years stable, there were times that I wouldn't have believed I would recover from the black dog (a euphemism for depression, but also a charity that raise awareness and offer support). As always, best wishes to you all. You are now part of a forum that no one would choose, but you will always find support from. 🍀