Forgetting me

[Ziggyrottie]

My beloved husband is in skilled now. This is his 2 stroke. My question is I feel the place is wiping me out of his memory and he is hugging a nurse that loves him to death. Our picture of us is always face down in his room. Oh and she gets really MAD when I visit at the window. Should I be concern will he remember that I am his wife when he comes home?

[New_beginning]

My husband is 41 recently sustained Traumatic Brain Injury, been married 19yrs this year, 2yr old and 14yr old. I truely understand what you are experiencing. I dont know what advice to give. I put my husband's wedding ring on a necklace, all i could do was hold it when thinking what would he say when a situation occurred. I cry whilst holding it, sing our wedding song and cry some more. I hope when lockdown eases you are strong during visits. All the best.

[TaIaV]

This does not sound like something that you should have to deal with quietly. Don't worry about being perceived as alarmist. Go to the management and indicate what you want to have change. Their responsibility is to provide care to the whole patient and that includes promoting positive family relationships to the fullest extent possible under the circumstances.

I know that this is a stressful time for you on several levels. Don't let that put you in a weak frame of mind. For his sake and for your own sake you need to be assertive. Caring caregivers in a facility is a terrific thing. But you need to have your role fully supported.

I am not commenting on what will happen when he gets home. There is no benefit to worrying about the future; you just get upset and nothing changes or gets clarified in the process. Focus on optimizing the present.

[timmy20]

All i can give you is my own experience. My husband had a stroke 5 yrs ago. His family had me thrown out of the hospital and i couldnt see him for 4 months until he woke from his coma. Even then his family made it practialy impossible for me to have any involvement. When he did come home i thought that things would be difficult, but he has never spoke to his family since. Because of his memory loss he dosent really remember being in hospital or the staff. He was just overjoyed to get back home,

Hopefully all will be well in the end, there is also a charity at the hospital that should help with this, All the best.

[Ziggyrottie]

I do have POA and the facility is going against it! They called the state when I was discharging against med Dr. and the state he said he wants to stay and likes it there! HE can't talk or even say his name.