'in a demoted capacitiy': Hi everyone (anyone around... - Headway

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'in a demoted capacitiy'

Julesgettingthere profile image

Hi everyone (anyone around ?)

Think I will probably loose my part-time job soon so am looking online to see what I could do.

Its got to be from home and im not much good at anything other than I still want to work hard for a living.

I am creative, anybody have any knowledge on where to look ? I wondered if government helped in aanyway with return to work after a Tbi. They probably wont help me as I retained my job so far, all be it entirely demoted.

Demoted is a good word for how the whole thing makes me feel.

Jules

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Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere
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I don't know what skills you have, but many self-employed people like to have someone who can answer their calls and make appointments for them. Could you do this? If so, how about putting a notice in your local paper/website offering your services?

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply to

Hello Exhausted

I am going to try and draft a little advert for myself offering exactly that - i might be able to do it - thank you very much for the idea.

I think i will put it in our local sainsburys

Julie

ps: will let you know if i do do it and if i get anywhere

in reply toJulesgettingthere

Another idea - do you have a college or university near you? Sometimes people are wanted to type up notes and things for students or staff. Maybe a notice on a board there, too?

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply to

Hello again Exhausted

Yes that might be an idea - i will wait and see if the work scheme can help me first.

I have an OT that visits, might ask him if he knows about it

Nice weather for ducks here in Newcastle, hope your part of the country is dry and sunny

Regards

jules

in reply toJulesgettingthere

The weather isn't too bad here although we have just driven back from the sussex coast and in one place the rain was torrential. Dry here though. Very good luck with the job, hope it works out for you. Jan

steve55 profile image
steve55

jules i think youre being a bit hard on yourself......the fact your back to work...cant be that bad.

as for the demotion, i dont know about you but im certainly not the confident person i was pre bi.......feel safer inside only going out at the weekend.....so much for the burly ex raf man.

i maybe wrong, but maybe thyre just trying to ease you back in to see how it goesgradually giving more and more of your authority back.

dont forget following a bi we tend to tire easily aswell.

steve

ps i go out with my wife at weekendso it makes sense

sospan profile image
sospan in reply tosteve55

"ps i go out with my wife at weekend so it makes sense"

Been with my wife for nearly 40 years (married for 33) and no time going shopping with her on the weekend with the wife has made sense :-)

The lies "I don't want anything but lets go and have a look!", "I have been looking for one of these for ages and it will go nice with ......."

The games of double jeopardy "Do I look fat in this....." "Which one looks best ?" and the worst one "can you find one of these in my size"

And that moment where the worst thing in the world happens - the money is spent and the shops are still open!

I expect to get roasted by our fellow lady posters for this :-)

sospan profile image
sospan

In the last 3 years plus, I haven't found any help at all in finding either role in my previous career or getting a new one.

Admittedly part of my problem is location, age, disabilities and bizarely over qualified and experienced. There aren't any quality volunteering roles to get stuck into either.

I have similar creative and organisational skills even though on time they fail and have to be reworked. I too would like to work from home, not so much that I don't want to mix with people but that would give me the options to work around fatigue and spend more time on things.

I have looked at making things to sell, but its difficult to find things that people will pay for that I can produce with a reasonable profit.

angelite profile image
angelite in reply tosospan

I'm not qualified in anything, as always worked multiple cleaning jobs around my son. My body was my tool - that's not working so good anymore and my cognitive is less than desirable ! Like you, working from home would be useful for fatigue and efficiency reasons - I could not pass health and safety for a walking about role without my stick and would be way slower physically and cognitively than the standard required in a commercial setting. The way the benefits system is set up means that my pension age partner and working son are expected to find extra money for bills I used to pay and also to keep me, now that I am disabled - this makes me feel awful and is a huge financial strain. I think a lot of us would like to work but are prevented by the pace, hours and efficiency demands made by the commercial world. For me , minimum wage per hour means employers want the max work possible during that hour so I can't compete with an able bodied person. Paying a set amount on completion of a job would make more sense for someone like me.

PS The fire is set and the spit is gleaming ! : ))

sospan profile image
sospan in reply toangelite

The PS made me smile - haven't heard those tems in a long time :-)

I too wouldn't or shouldn't pass a safety test.

I have always worked from the age of 7 moving bricks to when i was 50 and had my accident, never relied on benefits at all during that time. Now hate the loss of independence and reliance and the quikiness of the benefits system.

Probably like you I have many skills that would be useful to an employer but how to wrap it up in a job that would pay is difficult. I can't even think what the job would look like

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply tosospan

Hi again Sospan

What does your name mean ?

I had a giggle at you giggling about my 'PS' ! Is the term not used now ?

Odd, but i sometimes do this - i went through a stage of buying clothes that i would wear when i was a 17 year old biker chick - no idea why, i am nearly 50 !

PS: you will be glad to hear i didnt wear them x

forgot to ask you a couple of things

sospan profile image
sospan in reply toJulesgettingthere

Sospan is the nickname of the town in Wales I come from. The town used to have a massive tinplate industry and one of the things they used to make was Saucepans or Sospan (or Sosban). When the song SosbanFach became popular the name stuck with the town!

The days of a proper old fashioned fire long gone for a lot of us but making a comeback fortuneatly.

17 year old biker chick! spent many years myself and others dressed up like refugees from the Klingon army

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply tosospan

lets never grow up

x

sospan profile image
sospan in reply toJulesgettingthere

People always ask when am I going to grow up - Never !

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply tosospan

do you know an odd thing Sospan, i am about to turn 50 and all of a sudden i am seeing adverts in magazines/tv for clothing for the over 50's. I dont understand, my mum said a g-string bikini was probably inappropriate after 49 but my favorite blue jeans should be fine.

Only joking about the bikini, but not the jeans - whats different about jeans after you are 50 ?

Jules

sospan profile image
sospan in reply toJulesgettingthere

Ah its easy - fab forties, filthy fifties, sexy sixties. Jeans all part of looking hip and they are definatly not beige - the colour that really says I am getting old.

Just keep that g-string bikini handy its goin to get hot later on in June !

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply tosospan

thats the best advice i have been given in a long while - you should be a neuro scientist

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply tosospan

Hi Sospan

I am disheartened to hear you have had so little help when you still have the heart to work. So much is up to yourself to make sure happens after a Bi isnt it. Things i naturally thought there would be trained people AVAILABLE to help me. I mean at first people to naturally recognise what i needed but couldnt talk about and later, people to just support me a little more for a little longer so i can go as far as my brain will allow. We are left really, no matter what all the good words of government say. But i guess its not anyones fault - its all about funding and who needs it most which is correct.

Its just, you only have one life dont you, but it doesnt stop me from wondering why i struggle so.

Not making sense sorry.

Regards

jules

sospan profile image
sospan in reply toJulesgettingthere

Always had a strong work ethic, I think I always will.

It really is a strange position to be in even the disability advisor in the Job Centre said there is no need to go looking for work - which I found really at odds with what I had heard about the Job Centre.

I wish we had the same system over here that they have in France. Over there they have community jobs, where somebody whom may not fit into a regular role is found one in the community e.g looking after a small park or garden. In return for doing the role the state gives them a small allowance but takes care of all their other bills rent, tax, utility bills etc. The French call them the "Happy people" because they have a job for life and never have to worry about bills. I think its an absolutly brilliant idea.

You mention about struggling on there is a great modern Welsh song which captures that feeling "Yma o Hyd" - which means "still here" it is a song of difiance and the chorus is " in spite of everyone and everything. We are still here," It is all about that feeling when life has thrown everything at you and you have come out the other side and your still in the fight. :-)

And tomorrows Monday a new week ...

Julesgettingthere profile image
Julesgettingthere in reply tosospan

hi fryingpan

not sure if it was you who said it (i get the posts mixed up) but its true that you do meet a lot of people in positions giving you advice which you know to be wrong regarding tbi and general life.

I look at some of the consultants sometimes (and i am lucky i have some good neuro ones) but i think, 'you have probably never experienced a tbi so you couldn't possibly contemptate what i am feeling because i cant begin to find the words.

There is a lot said without words on this forum 'text only communication, odd isnt it. Nice thou - i always get a lot of comfort chatting to you lot.

Jules

x

sospan profile image
sospan in reply toJulesgettingthere

Yep, met a Headway advisor a retired Neuropsychologist, whom told me off for laughing when I do or say something stupid - apparently it reinforces negative thoughts - what a load of ........

Any always something interesting going on here - even if we talk complete drivel - its our drivel ;-)

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