It is Brian's 7th birthday tomorrow. (I mistyped 'brain' so often in the early days, I decided to call him 'Brian' to distinguish his behaviour from the old me.). I shall try to make it a day of taking stock, of celebrating how far I've come, but it is, as ever, still tinged with sadness at what I have lost. 'Tinged'? 'Sadness'? Maybe that's progress in itself. 'Riddled' and 'rage' would have been more appropriate, even last year. Actually, the truth is somewhere in between. I still mourn V1 and I still haven't accepted V2, of either my 'self' or my life. But this anniversary is a good time to look back and see how far I've come. Not that anyone understands any of this! I look and sound so like a neurotypical that nobody cuts me any slack. And I still do need some cutting. Maybe I should cut myself some!
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