torettes is easier than tbi

[zainey-lainey]

if you have torettes and have ticks an sware inapropiatly!! all you have to say is i have torettes and the mistakes made are taken lightly and it over folks heads yes??? why cant people here the word tbi or alike and excuse us and be more understanding and give us some lee way.We cannot help our condition but people coud try and help our condition. I want to burst into tears every time i feel i am looked down on ,dissapoited . the excuse i have had a brain injury means nothing to some.. ell you walk talk and look ok so no excuses/ if only they knew!!

ona ligher note i may say i hve torrete and i can then sware and shout at them for not understanding my rall condioton. lol.

[Hidden]

HERE HERE.

I HAD TO EXPLAIN THAT I'VE HAD A BI TO THE MAN WHO IS GOING TO DO MY DECORATING AS I WAS STARING AT HIM LIKE AN IDIOT COS I COULDN'T FIND THE WORDS TO TELL HIM WHAT I WANT.

I THINK IT'S BEST TO BE UPFRONT ABOUT BUT I AM SICK OF FEELING I HAVE TO DO IT. IT'S REALLY FOR THEIR BENEFIT NOT MINE BUUT I HATE BEING JUDGED & PEOPLE THINKING I'M DRUNK OR AN IDIOT. GRRR

TAKE CARE

[cat3]

This is my third attempt at a reply. It's infuriating when everything you've typed keeps disappearing........... so fingers crossed (difficult when typing).

I attended a family funeral yesterday and, as if it wasn't bad enough witnessing a burial and the grief of the direct family, I found myself seated with a group of cousins who I rarely see and who I refer to as the FGT (Family Gossip Team). So armed with knowledge of my BI they wanted to hear all the gory details but when I told them I have no memory of the event, they were visibly disappointed. They asked about after-effects and after I swiftly listed my main difficulties (memory, fatigue, mobility, word recall, headaches) they threw up their hands and, with great amusement, began competing to tell how they each suffered with ALL those issues ................and doesn't everyone ?

So although I agree with ZEB that being up-front can be useful in certain situations, it can be quite hurtful when confronted with bigoted, ignorant people who make you feel like a hypochondriac. You just wish you'd kept your mouth shut or stuck to the usual 'I'm fine ; can we talk about something else ?'

But generally, I think it's a case of muddling through all the different types of situation the best way we can. Or I might have a large sticker made...........BRAIN DAMAGED:CUT ME SOME SLACK !

Take care Zainey, think you're brilliant ! x

[Hidden in reply to cat3]

Hi Cat, yes I lost a couple of posts I was composing in a pm, then when I pressed submit, nothing seemed to happen. Pressed submit again and yes you guessed it, two replies submitted...

I digress,

Yes I must admit that I often bite my tongue when I'm about to say something like "Ohhh, my memory is terrible too". While I do suffer poor memory SOMETIMES, it doesn't compare to OH who has to put up with poor memory ALL OF THE TIME.

In most "normal" people it is often just an attempt to empathise, but it backfires because they have no concept of what it is like to be a BI survivor. Perhaps asking them what they think it would be like if they forgot things ALL OF THE TIME might enlighten them a bit. Its not fair though, because it puts the onus on the survivor to educate the 'normal' person.

OH often says she would get more sympathy if she wore a bandage round her head...

Take care, Dev

[cat3 in reply to Hidden]

Oh I agree Dev that many people do believe that their comments are reassuring and that if they can empathise it will make us feel less inadequate. But there are others who really do think we're exaggerating/attention seeking and when every day is a struggle, this can be hurtful and depressing.

I avoid most social situations anyway these days, which minimises these issues considerably. Just unfortunate to have a funeral and then a wedding within the space of 10 days !

Cat x

[Danslatete]

I would think of a very important thing, like a wedding or birth or big party or some occasion, then when they start to chat away, you just say, well I don't and that's the difference.