My son pointed me in the direction of this poem, google it and read but only if you can cope with the emotions, it is aimed at parents of disabled children but I feel it works for those of us mourning our previous lives. He has a daughter with Coffin- Lowry syndrome who is now 16 and spent many years coping with the problems and the fact that this is for life( yes she is my grand-daughter and a delight to have) he now has a mother with acquired brain injury but (and its not easy, I do sympathise with everyone in our position) I can be insufferably optimistic, probably because this has happened to me at 60 not when I was younger, but I take inspiration from my son and his wife, take the best you can from life, we're only this way once.
Take care
Love Janet