Ups and downs of a chronic illness

[ugreta]

I have POTS and migraines among other conditions and I’ve noticed that not just my symptoms but also my mood fluctuates - not necessarily with my symptoms. Often, even on my worst days, I have a can-do attitude, but I can quickly get depressed on some occasions. I have had depression before my chronic illnesses got worse and have been dealing with it with both medications and self help resources. These depressed days seem to be different to the ones I had in the past, it is more like helplessness. Knowing that I will wake up feeling unwell even on my best days - sometimes I just don’t have the spoons to put a smile on it. I thought I would share this here as my first post on this platform.

[SereneDC]

This is my first communication on this site. I felt compelled to let you know that you were heard. And understood. I believe I know the way you’re feeling. There are just some days - an ever increasing number, where I feel like “what’s the point?” Waking up feeling like crap just puts a damper on anything I may have planned to do that day, and makes it difficult to “put on a happy face.” This is so far from the person I used to be, and would like to be. On those occasions when I’m feeling ok, am enjoying myself, and present as being ‘happy’, it doesn’t take much to derail. It seems the smallest reminder of my medical/health situation and the reality of my life, is enough to drag me back down. While there doesn’t seem to be a perfect correlation between exacerbation of symptoms and mood, I do know that the more doctor appointments I have the worse I feel. I get burnt out going from doctor to doctor chasing relief and help, and often getting neither. I’ve had to remind doctors that I’m not looking for a diagnosis per se, I’m looking for help feeling better! Sorry, I digress ...

All I can say is hang in there. Do what makes you feel good and makes you happy.

[ugreta in reply to SereneDC]

Thank you for your reply and reassuring me that I’m not alone with this feeling! I hope you find the answers that will help you in the future

[b1b1b1]

Think about posting on the HU depression and anxiety site.