Perfect menstrual cycle but cannot ge... - Fertility Network UK

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Perfect menstrual cycle but cannot get pregnant

Shepli profile image
27 Replies

Hi all, I know it is a minefield, there is no one fits all, I just wondered if has been in my situation before.

All of mine and partner have had all fertility tests back, all absolutely fine and ‘normal’. My periods are like clockwork every month. They come on exactly when expected, but we have been trying for over two years and absolutely nothing, not even a chemical pregnancy. It just simply doesn’t happen. We take all of the vitamins we can. We go through times we’ve gone on holiday and we’re relaxed, we’re not stressed at all then times where we feel a bit more impatient. It is very scary to think that there is not a reason why it’s not happening. Is there anything else we should be trying?

We due to be going for IVF very soon but I’m starting to think I shouldn’t get too excited and I’m starting to lose faith that this will ever happen for me, which is a heartbreaking prospect.

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Shepli profile image
Shepli
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27 Replies
Shepli profile image
Shepli

for context to my post, I’m 29 going to be 30 soon. AMH levels is 18.9 and my partner has good sperm mobility. We are both within a good BMI and healthy.

Skittles11 profile image
Skittles11

Has your partner had a DNA fragmentation test? Have you had your tubes checked for any potential blockage?

Just a couple of thoughts/ ideas x

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toSkittles11

I haven’t had my tubes tested because the NHS don’t offer it, they essentially say the solution is IVF even if it is tube blockages anyway so they basically don’t waste time doing it. Which is wrong because you want know if that’s an issue! I might have to consider that privately. I don’t know about the DNA fragmentation test. I might have to have a look into that? Should both me and him be tested or just male?

tash1989 profile image
tash1989 in reply toShepli

Hi Shepli, I’m near Milton Keynes and I called up the gynae department and asked if they would test my tubes and they put me on a waitlist for the procedure but they did do it. Worth pushing them! NHS should do this for you.

Swimming87 profile image
Swimming87 in reply toShepli

DNA frag ia for male. We did it and it turned out useful knowledge x

Rox28 profile image
Rox28 in reply toShepli

I was referred to the gynae ward at my nhs hospital to check this before we even looked at ivf to rule it out as a reason it wasn't happening naturally. They also tested bf & found sperms wasnt great; motility, morphology, count, mobility etc so we had to do icsi. Started this when I was 31-32 & im now 39 soon to be 40..nothing if not persistant, 3 rounds on nhs prior to covid then did nothing for few yrs obvs with lockdown etc. Went private for 4th unsuccessful round, doing the 5th round now (started one prior to this where we didn't get as high follicle count as usual so cancelled that one). We both cut out caffeine (coffee & any fizzy caffeinated soft drinks), both took conception vitamin pills, I had a thyroid test & had to go on thyroxin as levels weren't suitable for fertility. Had a couple holidays in between to try relax too but it is frustrating when as you say period timing is spot on, mine is the same and oh my god these medications really test you. Sleepless nights, sweats, migraines....we all deserve medals!

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toRox28

Sorry to hear you have had to go through all of that. I hope it happens for you. It must be overwhelming and exhausting. My partner's morphology, count etc is all good. A real scratching head moment for sure. ❤️

Rox28 profile image
Rox28 in reply toShepli

Yep but will all be worth it once it eventually works. I stay positive but never get too down or too excited that way you can't be too disappointed. Thanks and same for you 😊

soccerkt6 profile image
soccerkt6

Hi lovely,

This is the same thing that happened with us - normal cycles, all our tests came back fine, but never any sign of a positive test. In our case, it ended up being an issue with sperm DNA fragmentation so I would strongly recommend having your partner get a sperm DNA fragmentation test done asap. Some 10-15% of men have high DNA frag despite having normal semen analysis results so it's definitely worth him getting checked out. Most IVF clinics offer the test so if you've already been referred to a clinic, I would check there first. If not, there's a private lab called Fertility Solutions where you can self-refer and get it done. They have locations in London and Bucks: fertilitysolutions.co.uk/dn...

Shepli profile image
Shepli

ah thanks so much. When this was diagnosed, what happens next. Is it resolvable? X

soccerkt6 profile image
soccerkt6 in reply toShepli

If the results come back with high frag, the next steps would be to see a urologist who specialises in male fertility (Dr Jonathan Ramsay is the most well-known/recommended) and they can do further investigations to figure out the underlying cause. Most often, the high frag is caused by a varicocele, infection in the urinary tract, or hormone imbalances. All of which is resolvable with appropriate treatment xx

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply tosoccerkt6

Amazing, thank you

WillowPark profile image
WillowPark

Hi Shepli, we were in a very similar situation. It is tough when you are told everything works and is perfectly healthy, but clearly it doesn't work and something is wrong. We were offered IVF on the NHS and I am now cuddling my little girl. It took a few rounds and a bit of time but so worth it. We still don't know why it didn't work and then suddenly it did, but whatever the issue is the statistics show that IVF is likely to overcome it. Also, if you are lucky enough to have IVF funding be careful about private tests (ie DNA frag etc) as sometimes mixing private and NHS treatment can affect NHS funding. Worth checking that with your NHS contacts before you do anything just in case. Hope you aren't waiting too much longer - good luck! x

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toWillowPark

Hi WillowPark - That is so amazing, congratulations, incredibly happy for you.

It’s definitely given me some faith. Fingers crossed.

The crazy thing is around the healthy lifestyle blows my mind, when there’s so many people around me that are overweight have health issues and they seem to be falling super easy. I hope i’ll get there with a little time. 🤞🏻

WillowPark profile image
WillowPark in reply toShepli

Yes I know how you feel - I ended up having to make a real effort to stop myself making those comparisons as the more you look at everyone around you getting pregnant the more you spiral into a very negative headspace. You start feeling singled out by some horrible force and can get quite angry at the world trying to understand why you. In the end it doesn't matter who else around you gets pregnant and whether they "deserve" it more than or have worked harder for it or waited longer for it than anyone else or not. The longer it took us the more I realised that everyone who wants to bring a child into a loving home deserves it, including us. It is an incredible privilege to be able to do it. Unexplained infertility is a horrible medical condition and I wouldn't wish it on anyone - so that must mean I want everyone around me to get pregnant easily! So bring on the babies! The benefit of having cared for your health and looked after your body is that you know you have given yourself the best possible chance of success - you can go into treatment with no regrets 🙂

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toWillowPark

Loved this reply. Brought smile, and slight tear to my eye. I agree with you. However, frustrating and upsetting, I have my health, and there is an element of 'it is what it is'. Hopefully it will happen one day. We can only do our very best. ❤️

MajorT profile image
MajorT

I thought I was fine as I always had regular periods too. My tests were also all fine, including DNA fragmentation. Unfortunately, most of my friends going though IVF have unexplained fertility. It’s frustrating, as there is no clear diagnosis you can then work through or take further decisions from. That’s not stopped any of us from going down the IVF route. Some of us have been successful and some not. Age is another factor for me that you won’t have, but finding your personal balance between keeping a positive mindset and knowing this is a journey where you don’t know the end date is important. Good luck!

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toMajorT

Thank you for your reply, it’s crazy isn’t it, they say the biggest indicator to healthy fertility is regular periods so that confuses me! Maybe it’s just this new world, I don’t remember this ever being such an issue back in the day and if there’s something causing it.

Purplecarrot profile image
Purplecarrot

We were told we'd mild male factor, but mostly unexplained infertility. We'd 2 rounds of unsuccessful IVF, and I found the scans and retrieval very painful (which is not usual, so don't let that frighten you). My acupuncturist said she thought I had endometriosis and PCOS. I thought that couldn't be, because I'd perfectly regular cycles. I went to the consultant she recommended, and he said he thought she was right, and scheduled me for a laparoscopy. Not only did I have quite a bit of endometriosis (which he excised), but I also have a unicornuate uterus and a missing fallopian tube, none of which had been picked up.We eventually went to Prague, I had the egg retrieval under general anaesthetic, it went super well and I'm currently just over 33 weeks pregnant.

I just wanted to let you know that there's hope. I was in a situation where there was nothing 'wrong' so nothing we could 'fix', and feeling very hopeless, but we got there. 3 unsuccessful rounds of IVF followed by a totally different, much more positive experience, resulting in this baby and 3 more blastocysts on ice.

Best of luck to you!!

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toPurplecarrot

Ah love that for you, what a lovely result in the end. Congratulations. That gives me faith, and hope!

Looom profile image
Looom

Hi Shepli, the same thing happened with us too, you are not alone. It's a horrible diagnosis because you just want to know what's wrong so it can be treated. I'm 35 this year and have been trying since 2021. We have had 2 failed IVF transfers and have 2 frozen embryos waiting to be used. I've tried everything under the sun but it hasn't worked yet, I really wish I knew the answer too! I can only suggest the things I've tried that can hopefully help you too:

It Starts With The Egg book - highly recommend. It sets out scientifically proven ways to increase your chances of conception, including tests to undergo.

Manifest book - this really helped me get out of a spiralling mental state.

Practice gratitude

Yoga

Acupuncture

Vitamins

Most importantly don't let this journey take over your life, prioritise the things you enjoy. You probably hear this all the time but you're lucky to have age on your side! Good luck and DM me if you're ever needing a chat or advice x

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toLooom

Thank you for your message. I totally share your confusion and helplessness. It seems to be so common, then everyone around me seems to have babies easily!!!

Have you had a laparoscopy? To check tubes etc. I have seen a few people mention this? I would be curious later down the line if the IVF does not work. I may message you as I approach the IVF process to see if you have any tips. Slightly scared!!! ❤️

Looom profile image
Looom in reply toShepli

I completely feel the same, it's very difficult when everyone around you is falling pregnant so easily.I've had a hycosy where they insert a dye into the uterus and tubes to check for any blockages, but mine were all clear. I've also had an MRI to check for endometriosis but no obvious signs either. Laproscopy is quite a serious operation, unless the MRI showed signs of endometriosis, I wouldn't consider it.

I do remember how you feel (pre IVF) and honestly the IVF process isn't as scary as you imagine. It's actually a good feeling as you know you are doing something productive that has a chance of leading to pregnancy!

Of course, any time ❤️

Millbanks profile image
Millbanks

Hi lovely,

Ugh the worst diagnosis of all "unexplained" ultimately meaning they don't know and don't want to investigate further.

We were the same as you, all tests came back really good - so if we were just going on that I should have been pregnant first time of asking. However I had a HSG test done which showed both my tubes were blocked and leaking fluid in to my uterus.

Fast forward and after 4 egg collections and 6 transfers (after having my tubes clipped) we finally had success after finding that my immune system was super high and was rejecting every single embryo transferred. It was a complicated journey but we got there in the end.

My point is that just because you've not been able to get pregnant naturally doesn't mean that IVF won't work - if your levels are pretty good then you have a good chance. It is just such a minefield. Luckily you have joined the best forum with the BEST people on it who will guide you through whenever you need it.

Wishing you lots of luck xx

Shepli profile image
Shepli in reply toMillbanks

Ah so interesting!! Is HSG test on NHS or did you have to discover this privately after some time? So pleased for you that you got there 🙏🏻🙏🏻 What a journey.

Millbanks profile image
Millbanks in reply toShepli

So we had the HSG test on the NHS before starting any treatment. Then I had an egg collection before having the tubes clipped (then started frozen transfers).

We did end up going privately due to covid - but TBH I probably would have gone privately in the end anyway as they do so much more testing - the NHS (as wonderful as they are) have finite resources on testing.

xx

Londonlady2024 profile image
Londonlady2024

Hi, after my firstborn was tragically stillborn, we went to our Dr for IVF referral because I was scared of getting too old if I was too continue trying naturally (I was 40). All tests came back normal and we were considered "unexplained". My amh was higher than yours at 23.9, I didn't have PCOS, had good afc too...was aged 41 by the time we did tests/blood work. It took us 4 IVF rounds to finally get our rainbow baby from around Feb 2022 - Nov 2023, that's including the 4 month rest I took from IVF. The first round was NHS funded (I only got 1 round because I was over 40), the rest we had to self-fund through the NHS hospital.

I would suggest taking good quality supplements including for vaginal health...you could have bad bacteria in your vagina.

Secondly, I would have a good diet. I know your bmi is within range but are you eating healthy?

Please also get your progesterone checked.

Also, how do you know you have been ovulating every month? Regular periods do not mean that you are ovulating.

I hope this helps.

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