*Sensitive* first ever BFP at 4am thi... - Fertility Network UK

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*Sensitive* first ever BFP at 4am this morning. But still worried..advice pls?

KOT7 profile image
KOT7
58 Replies

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Hi all,

As the title says.. We got out first ever BFP this morning. Couldn't sleep so just thought sod it and got up to do the test at 5 to 4!

Never ever thought we'd see the cross in the box but we did. But... I'm now absolutely panicking. Does anyone know how many BFPs go on to ultimately fail? I'm PETRIFIED to be excited. I thought I'd feel differently today but I'm just scared it's all gonna go wrong. Is that what all the previous failed rounds makes us??? Scared to enjoy this amazing day we've been waiting for for so long.

I'm so Sorry to anyone reading this thinking I'm being so ungrateful.. I'm not, I'm just VERY cautiously excited but wondering what the stats are so I know what I'm working with? We won't have viability scan for 3 weeks and I don't want to get ahead of myself.

X

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KOT7 profile image
KOT7
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58 Replies
LKT1 profile image
LKT1

Congratulations and welcome to parenthood! When I got my long awaiting BFP I didn’t believe it either. I’ll be honest I’m still worrying at 23 weeks now. Another mum (even without fertility struggles) said this is the start of parenthood and you will worry about them for the rest of your life 😂. I did a test every few days up until my scan to reassure myself...just make sure you continue to use early morning urine if you do this xx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to LKT1

Thank you and congratulations xx

Cook7786 profile image
Cook7786

No no no, this is normal! It’s all the hurdles. My partner and I tested at 2.30am 9dp5dt. I kept looking at her and then the test. But we just didn’t believe it. I’m six weeks today and we are still trying our hardest not to let our imaginations run wild. All the things that can go wrong. I don’t really feel pregnant but I definitely am! Waiting patiently for the heart beat scan in a week today.

All you can do is be happy you are in the best possible position right now. You’re in the lead, ready for the next hurdles. (We ended up testing every other day for the next week) Your test is very positive - no doubt that is a strong positive.

I must admit though, this stage has been the biggest mind f*^k. Keep calm and carry on!

X

Suzy86 profile image
Suzy86 in reply to Cook7786

So glad you think this is the biggest mind f**k! It really is! I’ve been testing too just to check the lines are getting stronger and the weeks are going up on the clear blue tests.🙈 I woke up this morning 5weeks today knowing it’s another mini milestone and that makes me so happy. Congratulations on your BFP and good luck for your viability scan!!

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Cook7786

Firstly, congratulations. I'm so glad someone else has felt the same!! It's so hard not to be negative one minute then planning your entire future the next! Good luck with the scan. x

Suzy86 profile image
Suzy86

Hey! Congratulations on your positive test. I got my BFP last Friday and I am so thrilled and beyond excited but I have to say the doubt and worry is very much there. I am trying my best to enjoy it and I really really am but also am scared to get my hopes up so I totally understand. I think this last week has felt sooo long as I count down to viability scan. I’m hoping after the scan I can relax and enjoy Christmas before I worry about the next milestone! There is nothing to say that your or my pregnancy won’t be healthy and result in beautiful babies. Enjoy today because it’s a day I’m sure you have dreamed of for a long time!

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Suzy86

Thank you. It is! It's felt truly surreal and I've had EVERY emotion!

Congrats on your bfp wonderful news. I understand the nerves I spent my whole pregnancy worrying until our daughter Francesca arrived safely. I think after such a difficult journey it’s normal to feel like this, wish I had words to make this easier. The only way to survive is to take it one day at a time no point in thinking the worst because that might not be your reality ( hopefully not) if it was thinking about doesn’t make it any easier ( I had a chemical pregnancy) try to celebrate each milestone you reach. All the best with your pregnancy hope all goes well xxx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to

Thank you so much xx

amandac84 profile image
amandac84

Yay congrats for you this is so exciting!

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to amandac84

thank you x

Hopefull90210 profile image
Hopefull90210

I also got BFP at 4am this morning so we are in the same boat! Need to treat it as another hurdle! Well done us!xx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Hopefull90210

yay congrats to you as well!! I really hope we can get through the next few weeks. When are you going to tell people (i.e. close friends/fam)? x

Bluebirds7 profile image
Bluebirds7

Congratulations! that is great news.

I do understand where you are coming from in being worried it might go wrong. But I think that is perfectly normal. Wishing you lots of luck x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Bluebirds7

thank you x

Bluebirds7 profile image
Bluebirds7 in reply to KOT7

I just got my BFP this morning...so i'll be joining the nervous wait until 6/7 week scan!

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Bluebirds7

Yay!!!!! Congrats. X

Congrats! Exciting times! Thats a lovely strong positive.

I have been one of those people whose BFPs ended in MC several times and all I can advise is worrying does NOTHING to help. You think you are preparing yourself for the worst and so feel very negative and try and protect yourself, but actually when it did go wrong for me it hadn't prepared me at all and I was still knocked for six, so I had actually wasted so many weeks being negative and worrying for nothing.

With a test as strong as that I would say you are in great shape and things are progressing as they should. So try all you can to park the worry as its not good for you and your baby, and just enjoy the fact you've done it! You are pregnant! Celebrate, and enjoy watching your baby grow! Positive thoughts are really important xx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to

Thank you so much. I'm sorry you've had such an awful time. Did they find a reason for you MCs? I've not got to that stage yet so I have no idea what it would feel to go from BFP to such devastating news. That must have been so difficult. x

Congratulations!!

Completely normal. I had a chemical before my son and told I'd probably never have a baby and to spend my money on a holiday instead! I tested several times a day until my 12 week scan (I'd had several at epu too) and still tested now and then till 20 weeks!! I worried all through my pregnancy then just as much when he was here. He's just turned 2 and still sleeps in with me as I was scared to let him sleep without me. Mum worry/anxiety is real from the second you get that positive 😩

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to littlemisstired80

WOW, that's amazing that you just carried on and got exactly what you wanted and needed. Massive congratulations to you and thanks for your comment x

DianeArnold profile image
DianeArnoldPartnerNurseFertility Network UK

Hi KOT. Looks a good positive result to me! No doubt you will test again! Just look forward to your first scan, and then you will see how wonderful your tiny little person is. Diane

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to DianeArnold

Thank you Diane. x

andromedae9 profile image
andromedae9

Congratulations!! It's normal to worry. We got a BFP on the 18 of Nov and still can't believe it! Our previous transfer was a chemical and our first BFP ever. I will probably keep testing all the way up until my scan on the 17th Dec but so far so good! Fingers crossed for both of us!

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to andromedae9

Congratulations on this BFP.

Do you mind if I ask re your previous transfer, at what stage it resulted in a chemical?

andromedae9 profile image
andromedae9 in reply to KOT7

Not at all. Two days after OTD the positive line faded and I did a Beta and it showed a very low number.

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to andromedae9

oh God that's awful. I'm sorry. I don't have a blood test, our clinic just gave us a home test which is making me nervous now!

andromedae9 profile image
andromedae9 in reply to KOT7

My clinic does not do blood tests as a standard either. They do offer it if you want to or if you're bleeding.

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to andromedae9

Oh I see. Ok thanks so much x

cab0813 profile image
cab0813

Congrats!! I was terrified as well, even after my beta came back with great numbers. I did 4 at home pregnancy tests and each time they got lighter so of course, naturally, I worried myself. But i had 2 more scheduled betas that showed good increase in hcg, and had another on monday due to a bleed and still my numbers were great. Also saw my little sacs on the ultrasound and they were measuring great! My viability scan is in a week and I am worried every day. I think it just comes with the whole 'infertility package.' No matter what, we're always worried the worst will happen. Keep your head up and enjoy your pregnancy (this is what my OH tells me every day). I will be praying for a healthy pregnancy for you <3

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to cab0813

Thank you so much. And congratulations to you. x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7

Sorry, just another query... is it weird that I've not had/don't plan to have a blood test???

Our new private clinic just gave us a home test which I did this morning. Am I still allowed to be excited?!

Cook7786 profile image
Cook7786 in reply to KOT7

Just pregnancy tests for us too. They gave us one for OTD and then one to do the following week and a spare for good luck.

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Cook7786

ok not just us then, thanks x

Massive congratulations 😊 we also got our first positive yesterday 11 days p5dt

I’m feeling exactly the same as you are and my clinic in Shropshire also don’t offer bloods, just do your test at home and then the scan is around 7 weeks so not sure on your date? But I’ve got to wait till 30th. When I’ve asked others it seems normal for no bloods to taken even though betas were everywhere I read on my 2ww so it’s a bit like being in limbo now isn’t it? I’m going to test once a week now leading up to the scan

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to

Hi, yay congratulations!! Have you found any stats on how many BFPs at 4 weeks go onto miscarriage.. or is it just me that's so morbid??? I'm petrified.

Scan should be 27th but I'm going from where we live (North East) back home (to North West) for Christmas so I've booked for 23rd but they said we may need to go back a week later.

Yeh I've just stocked up on a load of tests! x

in reply to KOT7

No I’ve tried to stop myself doing all this reading up now, the 2ww wait I was off work and home alone so constantly googling stuff. We’ve got to this first hurdle and it’s time to relax and embrace it I think .... happy and positive thoughts. That being said now you’ve mentioned it I’m off to google 🙈 x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to

Oh God no don't! haha sorry! I'm obsessively looking for info that's not there. The fact is, it's unpredictable isn't it and I guess we just have to wait. When are you going to tell people? x

in reply to KOT7

Not matter how hard you look u don’t think you find exactly what you’re looking for just more questions and things to worry about. We told parents when we started the injections (7 years of trying and tests to get to this point) we also told our bosses as we needed time off for appointments. I’m hoping to keep it between the little circle until 12 weeks but at the moment I’m so bloated and actually lost weight to start the cycle i now look about 12 weeks already so not sure how long I can hide it for. I wish I could scream it from the roof tops now but it’s such early days the more people who know the wonderful news the more people we would have to tell if we had bad x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to

Yeh, I'm tempted to drive home this weekend and tell my parents, just scared of jinxing anything... which is almost as ridiculous as my googling habit x

in reply to KOT7

I’d tell them :) share your lovely news, and they can be there for you every step of the way. X

in reply to KOT7

Also stay in touch 😊 it’s so nice to find someone so close to my dates on the journey ❤️

HollyT7 profile image
HollyT7

Congratulations!! I was the same, so worried to be excited and happy. I still have days when I worry now and I'm 18 weeks today. I think maybe it's part and parcel of our warrior status maybe? Take every day as it comes and remind yourself that nothing productive or positive came from worry. your pregnant woooo!! I hope you have a lovely pregnancy xxxxx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to HollyT7

Ahh thank you!! and congrats to you too xx

Cinderella5 profile image
Cinderella5

Congratulations!!xx

That is so exciting! Congrats! Wish you a healthy pregnancy!!! Xx

Zebedee1971 profile image
Zebedee1971

Hey!

I've had three positives and none have resulted in a pregnancy (still waiting on this one though!), so it's just a waiting game I'm afraid. Hopefully it sticks around. Doctors always say the fact it's implanted means it bodes well for the future , whatever the outcome of this one is. If you can get pregnant, then you will again. I'd say just enjoy the feeling of seeing that little cross- try not to think too far ahead, but enjoy the excitement. I'm trying to enjoy my BFP at the moment but the partner's being a grump because my HCG level was lower than expected and the lines aren't getting darker, so he's convinced we've failed. But I'm still being optimistic- I haven't had a positive for 18 months so it's a little ray of light. Enjoy yours :) x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Zebedee1971

Oh God. I'm just about to drive 200 miles home to tell my parents. Should I not? I Didn't realise there was such a high change of this not being the real thing? Did they find out why all your previous 3 went on to fail? That's so many, I'm sorry x

Zebedee1971 profile image
Zebedee1971 in reply to KOT7

I've told my mum and best friend every time I've got a positive- I can't keep something like that to myself! And if it does go wrong, least there's the emotional support. I'd still tell them if it were me, but I tell my mum everything :) but maybe stress the fact it's early days. It's ok to be excited!

I honestly grew up thinking all pregnancies were plain sailing and you'd have to be really unlucky to have a miscarriage. Unfortunately so many fail before the 12 weeks. As I've found out the hard way.

Yours might make it though :D

There's no reason why it won't, I have my fingers crossed for you x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Zebedee1971

Wow OK

Thanks, I think!

Bosa19 profile image
Bosa19

Congratulations!! When more time has passed I´m sure the nervousness will go away and the happiness will settle in!! So happy for you!! :)

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Bosa19

Thank you x

Solly-44 profile image
Solly-44

Ah I’m so pleased for you! And yes, the fear is unbelievable 😬

Try to focus on the good though and take it as easy as you can. Congratulations xx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Solly-44

Thank you xxx

Dreamingofbaby profile image
Dreamingofbaby

Congratulations hun. It understandable to feel that way. Xx

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Dreamingofbaby

Thank you x

Tiddly1984 profile image
Tiddly1984

Hey, big congratulations. It’s normal to worry but try to take each day at a time. Passing milestones help too but I don’t think there’s much of a short cut to this journey unfortunately. I wouldn’t bother with stats either as they won’t tell your story and even where you interpret them in your favour you’ll just worry about being one of the unlucky ones if u get caught up in them. Congratulations again...x

KOT7 profile image
KOT7 in reply to Tiddly1984

I know you're right. Just so hard not knowing isn't it! Thanks for your message x

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