Sending myself crazy

[Helpamumma]

Hi All

I cannot take my own advice

Today I am 5+6 days and I’m full panic mode as it was this time that I lost our last baby.

My blood test have shown extremely high figures and the term multiples has been thrown around quite a bit but I feel so out of sorts.

With my son & the baby I lost I felt nauseous by now but nothing, nada.

Our viability scan is 8 days away and I am on struggle street I’m literally thinking up ideas of ways I can get a scan somewhere else on Friday. I’m nuts I know this 🤦🏻‍♀️

[WaywardGirl]

It’s really tough isn’t it? I am also 5+6 today and lost my last one sometime around 8/9 weeks. My viability scan is on Friday, when I’ll be 6+3. I’m terrified that I’ll go and there will be nothing there.

As for symptoms, mine have been up and down this time round - some days my boobs are sore and heavy, some days I feel really sick, other days there are no symptoms.

Good luck, I’ll be thinking of you x

[Helpamumma in reply to WaywardGirl]

How are you coping with the fear? I feel consumed by it and the thoughts going through my head are sending me around the twist, you so lucky u can go in on Friday my clinic said not to as it may be too early to see anything?

I must say I’m super tired and my boobs are on and off sore but nothing compared to last time.

Is this the first time your symptoms have been all over the place?

[WaywardGirl in reply to Helpamumma]

Last time I had medicated FET and the symptoms were more severe and more consistent. This time round is natural FET (sooo nice not to have to do the dreaded pessaries!).

I actually had a scan today because I’d been having pain low down on the right hand side and been spotting brown blood for over a week and they were worried it could be ectopic. All looks as it should for 5+6 weeks, but no heartbeat yet. Hoping to see that on Friday...

[Helpamumma in reply to WaywardGirl]

Wow that sounds stressful, iv women up thismorning and I feel so normal not really tired, boobs aren’t sore and still not sick I just can’t see how I’m going to get good news and the idea of waiting another 7 days for it makes me feel ill. Good luck on Friday, I’ll be thinking of you, guess that’s that pain of getting an early scan at 5+6 is so unlikely to see what we want to see x

[Tiddly1984]

Hi Helpamumma,

I’m 5+5 days and don’t have sore boobs, nausea or sickness yet I know the pregnancy is fine because I had a scan on Saturday. I know it’s cliche to say but every pregnancy is different so please try not to worry. The absence of your typical symptoms is not indicative of anything being wrong. Give this pregnancy all of your positive energy and belief that things will be ok and I’m sure it will be. It’s difficult trying to contain ourselves and our emotions but the more thought u give to trying to get scan the more you’ll convince yourself that something is wrong in the event that you don’t get one. Blood tests have not given you cause for concern so try to be still and remain hopeful. x

[Helpamumma in reply to Tiddly1984]

Thank you 🙏🏼 that was really lovely

I’m generally a very impatient person so this is hard, especially since it’s this time frame when things went south last time.

[Tiddly1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

I completely understand your reasons and there are probably very few woman who wouldn’t be anxious around this time if they were in your position. I’m also extremely impatient too hence having a scan already, but whilst I had that first scan, it was quite painful when they inserted the probe and the thought came to mind of me subjecting myself and our baby to unnecessary procedures and potentially putting our baby at risk for nothing. I know that scans are said to be harmless but my partner had been against pushing for one and he was right. So what I took from that escapade of mine is to just be patient. You’re not wrong for wanting one, because they can be reassuring but sometimes it’s not necessary unless it’s necessary. Wishing you all the best...x

[Helpamumma in reply to Tiddly1984]

What did your scan show so early at only 5weeks?

I was told that first scan should be 6w4d which is a sat and my apt is for Tues which will put me at 6w7d

I just don’t understand what the big deal is scanning me at 6w3d on Fri 🤦🏻‍♀️ it’s only 1 day early...

I guess after a loss everything is different, I was not this terrified last time.

My outlook on pregnancy has completely changed to know there is no safe period until your baby is in your arms

[Tiddly1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

Sorry, for the delayed response. I didn’t get a notification that u had replied; I simply came to see if you had posted anything else.

I do understand why you’re worried and I agree that after a loss it undoubtedly makes a person more anxious and fearful. It’s difficult to believe that things will be different but you have to believe just that. Remain hopeful and as your pregnancy progresses you’ll start to feel so much more reassured.

With regards to my scan, it showed the gestational sac and the yolk sac. They measured both and both were the appropriate size. I still worry everyday but I’m just telling myself that God intends for me to meet my baby and for him or her to be healthy.

I’m sure everything will be fine with you too and with your scan on Saturday. Good luck...x

[Helpamumma in reply to Tiddly1984]

Thank you, I’m going for my scan this afternoon so very nervous but excited also. How did yours go?

[Tiddly1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

My scan is today so fingers crossed it all goes well. Hoping to see a heartbeat at 6+3...x

[sarahJE]

I’m 10 weeks today and finding it hard to wait for my 12 week scan. I had a FET and my bloods also showed very high hcg levels, viability scan went well and yet I still worry! Best of luck to you x x x x

[Helpamumma in reply to sarahJE]

That’s so nice to hear everything went well, I imagine the whole pregnancy would be a little on edge if you have experienced a loss. Guess it just makes you even more grateful x

[Helpamumma]

Hi ladies, I felt like I needed to post an update. We had our scan today at 6w+3d and it’s twins 🤭 we had our 5days embryo put back and fell pregnant naturally WTF after over 2 years of trying, 3 failed IUI’s, IVF and a miscarriage it happens now? The same month we put our last frosty back 🤭

OMG I am gob smacked, so overwhelmed and flawed that this is happening and that’s about my full range of emotions right now I cannot believe it.

Hope everyone else is well x

[Tiddly1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

Woohoo big congratulations. I would have loved to have had twins. How amazing that this has happened with your last frosty....x

[Lorry1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

Hi,

Ive just read your post and wanted to say a massive congratulations to you! Thats such a wee miracle that you have there. No wonder you're shocked! Amazing news. 😁

Im currently 5+3 and think my HCG levels are above average. I've been googling and twins have cropped up so now my mind is wandering.

5 weeks = 5,100

5 weeks 2 days = over 12,000.

Would you remember what your HCG levels were and be happy to share?

Thanks xx

[Helpamumma in reply to Lorry1984]

Hi

Shocked is an understatement to say the least.

When I was 4w3d it was 635 and 3 days later at 4+6 it was 4500 and a few day later was over 7000 which would of placed me just over 5 weeks.

Yours do seem high, are you hoping for twins? Do you any other children at home too ?

[Lorry1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

Oh I can imagine! What were you able to see on the scan? Such an exciting time for you!

The aim of the game is for one happy and healthy baby but we'd also be delighted to have twins. Im just worried that my HCG is too high and that ir could be a molar pregnancy! This journey is a never ending worry, isn't it?

Wishing you an easy and happy pregnanxy! xx

[Helpamumma in reply to Lorry1984]

We saw 2 sacks with their own placenta and heart beats.

That was my aim also I am very scared and overwhelmed at the idea of twins and freaked out is the understatement of the century

I’m actually really interested to see if your having twins as well as that jump in 2 days was enormous but you never know could be 1 fat little blueberry growing in there

This journey I feel is going to be very stressful and difficult to my first with my son (almost 4)

As soon as she said high risk my heart dropped

[Lorry1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

That's great that you could see their little heartbeats at 6+3. The whole IVF process fascinates me and for you to fall pregnant with IVF and on your own in the same month is a miracle. Of course you're going to be worried but I really believe that everything happens for a reason.

I get your concerns about twins, especially with a 4 year old son already. He's at a great age to get involved and help you out with the babies. As much as the idea of twins excites me the reality of it freaks me out. Do you have a good circle of friends and family near by? xx

[Helpamumma in reply to Lorry1984]

I had this feeling as well that I wanted to cancel the transfer because I was unsure if I was ready after just having a miscarriage and also I knew we had gotten busy.

I know my little man will be a great helper but my concern runs deeper then that, I just straight up don’t know if I’m cut out to be a mum of twins which might sound horrible and selfish but it’s my reality

Neither of us have any family it’s just us, I guess that’s another contributing factor to my fear

[Lorry1984 in reply to Helpamumma]

It doesn't sound horrible or selfish at all. It sounds natural to me. Please try not to worry too much and enjoy your pregnancy. You will surprise yourself xx