Dreading starting IVF tomorrow - Fertility Network UK

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Dreading starting IVF tomorrow

KEndo16
KEndo16

Hi, do you have any tips on how to approach IVF? It’s my first time. I turned 43 yesterday so I’m feeling anxious and a bit down today. Feels like my husband and I have all our faith in the clinic, yet we haven’t researched IVF massively and feel like I should be more prepared. I know the basics, but if you could give one piece of advice to a newbie, what would it be?

29 Replies
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My advice is don't panic during the process - it can be a bit of a rollercoaster :) ups and downs. First cycle is hard as you don't know what is going on - well at least we didn't :)

Wishing you best of luck!!!

Xxx

Hey, my advice would be take everyday as it comes and if you have any questions or if you are unsure of anything ask your clinic x

82Jane
82Jane
in reply to TRYING2016

Exactly, don’t ask google or a forum you don’t trust xxx

Agree, this is great advice.

Try to take each day as it comes - stay as calm as possible and try to stay positive! Some days will be harder than others, but you can get all the support you need on here! Good luck xxxx

Try to take it one step at a time. It can become overwhelming. We’re all here if you have any questions or concerns xx

Becca21
Becca21
in reply to Tugsgirl

This is the best part about the forumAll the ladies support each other through the ragged fertility journey. <3 <3 This is why I hopped in when I was getting antsy about testing and all the odds were flooding my mind. There's so much knowledge, help and positivity here. Thanks to all you ladies.. for all that support!! Sending love and baby dust to all. :)

Tugsgirl
Tugsgirl
in reply to Becca21

And to you too xx

Look after yourself - don't take on other responsibilities, don't feel guilty about turning down invitations, take up the counselling and treat yourself/yourselves to some nice things (meals, days out, shopping) during the process. I've had 4 cycles and I really believe that being less stressed and taking time from other responsibilities helped my successful 4th cycle. We don't have a choice but to put our faith in the clinics, but if you feel unsure at any point, just ring them, there's no such thing as a stupid question. Do have a look at the HFEA website and note any questions for your consultant. The add-ons information was one thing I wish I'd read beforehand: hfea.gov.uk/treatments/expl.... All the best for your treatment xx

Think positive, be prepared for a rollercoaster ride of emotions and don't be afraid to ask your clinic anything! All the very best x

Hi there, i’d say to take it one step at a time, otherwise it can get quite overwhelming. Wishing you lots of luck 💕 xx

I absolutely agree with PP that you need to relax and try to control the trepidation. Trust me it makes no difference at all if it's your First or your Third round, it feels the same every time. Hugs to you! I know it's definitely easier said than done.. I'm on my restless 2ww and feels like "hell with all the don'ts" at times. But then the psycho-emotional stability is very very important for any advanced fertility aid procedure. You yourself have to figure it out what can bring back the sanity and optimism for you. Like I figured if I'd have to stick to the strict no POAS till 12DPFET I'd better don't buy any tests... as long as I can lay my hands on one I cannot restrain myself. Maybe music can help, watch or do things that make you happy... not very rigorous activities though... you need to stay full-on-energy.

Im in the same boat, and feel so anxious and worried all at the same time :-(

Thank you, everyone! It’s such a strength to know that you’re all out there, in various stages of experience. So thank you for taking the time to pass on advice. At age 43 I’m trying to be realistic, yet calm about my chances. It’s very strange to be this age and be going through something for the first time. I have adenomyosis and have also had four laparoscopies for endometriosis, so the chances of success are slim. But this, we have decided, is a journey I need to go on to move on. Will be taking up counselling, as we are only going to give it one shot.

medzed09
medzed09
in reply to KEndo16

Well done on making the decision and knowing this is next for you, and starting it. I did very little research and am taking it a day at a time in manageable chunks. My main focus has been on reducing stress/guilt and just seeing what happens. Your positive but realistic attitude will keep you calm, and will be the best preparation for your body. All the very very best xxx

Just trust the clinic, NOT GOOGLE, they are the specialists. The internet is full of negativity and of course it’s gonna be as people aren’t posting when enjoying their pregnancy. Stay calm, ignore random statistics. If you are emotionally uptight so is your body. Have you thought about treating your body- massage, acupuncture? To relax you xxx

I would say trust your instincts. If there is something you don't think you should do, don't do it. I had a dental scan two weeks before my ivf treatment. I thought at the time I shouldn't be doing this but the dentist said it was fine. But on that round (the last one with my own eggs) there were no viable eggs and I still think back on it now.

A money saving tip is to ask your clinic if they can give you a prescription as you want to get your own medicine. Asda pharmacy don't charge a profit on ivf medicine and so it saved me hundreds of pounds using them rather than the pharmacist in my clinic.

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I just wanted to wish you lots of luck with your cycle Hun. I found that once I got started ,the IVF process wasn't as bad as I expected. Like others have said, don't be afraid to ask your clinic questions & communicate with your OH. I didn't talk or share how I was feeling with my husband which looking back was a mistake. Also try not to put too much emphasize on your age, I'm 41 so I did feel negative about my age. I was one of the lucky ones & got a BFP so us older women can do this 🙂. Be prepared for the 2WW too. I didn't have a clue how much the wait would mess with my head, definitely the worst thing about IVF in my opinion. I hope you get your much wanted baby 😘 xx

Hi Kendo, am also starting IVF today. We can do this! All the advice and support on here is brilliant and I can’t thank everyone enough. All the best today and if you want to compare needle wound just let me know! All the best xxx

Refocus
Refocus
in reply to Barbara1012

I started yesterday! One needle down and for me it immediately washed away a lot of my anxiety. Good luck to you both and definitely call your clinic with any questions at any time. I've done it loads already and not once have I felt an agitated nurse on the other end of the phone, they're always really helpful. Xxx

KEndo16
KEndo16
in reply to Refocus

Good to see there are others joining the journey. I am so naive I feel. I’ve just drawn up a table of dates and drugs. Feeling a bit more organised. Until it hit me I didn’t want to read forum conversations as I felt overwhelmed. Let’s stay in touch on here as we are all going through this. I’m on norethisterone and start injections 3.8.18 and live in East Sussex. It’s actually quite exciting now knows no I’m not alone.

Refocus
Refocus
in reply to KEndo16

I'm trying to move to East Sussex (from London)! I'm on a short cycle, taking gonal-f and cetrotide. Sadly there's a lot of us going through it. Fingers and toes crossed for us all! X

KEndo16
KEndo16
in reply to Barbara1012

Hello Barbara, I just replied to Refocus and meant to cc you in too! Great that we are going through this together. Good luck!

Barbara1012
Barbara1012
in reply to KEndo16

Thanks lovely. First injection down - I was super tired and fell asleep by 9pm ( think it was the anxiety and nerves more than the drugs!) and now am wide awake at 4 am. I think this is going to be an interesting journey!! Xxx

Look after your mental health, most clinics offer free counselling so make use of it if you need extra help. There's no shame in getting help if you have anxiety.

As others have said take each day at a time. There are so many hoops to jump through along the way - each blood test, scan etc that if you think about it all it can be overwhelming.

Also if you are unsure about anything then ask you clinic rather than sit around wondering.

Good luck with it all.

x

I am just starting my 6th cycle. This cycle is a fresh cycle. I am very lucky to have two babies through IVF one from my first fresh cycle and one from 4th frozen. From my experience all I can say is take each day as it comes. Step away from Google it will only drive you mad. Keep busy doing nice things for yourself. Lastly try not to symptoms spot as there is no telling until the otd and you just end up stressing yourself out. Will be thinking of you. It is always so reassuring to know there are other women experiencing the same situation as you. Forums like this give you the support you need. All the best X

Hello! I've just started my first cycle as well. I know it depends on the person but I have been really open with what I am going through with family, friends & work colleagues and have been overwhelmed and heartened with the support I have received. I also started acupuncture last year and that has helped me enormously to realise the impact stress can have on me and to try to control that. And finally, my husband & I both read a book, written by wife & husband called "Get a Life". My mum & mother in law now both have copies, as do 2 of my best mates and I know my husband found it such a really useful book for him to understand how he can support me through the journey. Best of luck to you both Xox

Good Luck xxx

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