Midwifery Care

[Bluelady-sing]

Hi folks,

What your care like did they appreciate all that you had gone through to conceive.

[Newyeae]

My midwife has been very good and extra careful as this is our first ivf baby. She was close to having ivf herself in the past so she understands more i think. My region seems to be more cautious with ivf pregnancies generally but I know other areas treat it like a normal naturally conceived pregnancy. One thing my consultant did mention was that they recommend you don't go much over your due date because of a higher risk of stillbirth for ivf babies which I was surprised at.

[Staceq]

Hi, we didn't go though IVF as we were lucky enough to fall naturally just before we were due to start IVF. We were under the care of a fertitly specialist and we have several tests (including a lap) and it hasn't been mentioned. They asked as part of the initial midwife appointment (as it's on the paperwork) but that's it. No follow up or mention of fertitly issues at all.

[Hidden]

Hi - after my 1st m/c I thought I would be offered some additional care for 2nd pregnancy. I wasn't offered anything, despite telling the midwife and GP about my anxiety and concerns. Sadly my concerns were right and I suffered a 2nd m/c.

I was shocked by the lack of care despite my history - why bother asking if they're not going to do anything to support you? I really hope others have a more positive experience of care than I did xxx

[Lilli79 in reply to Hidden]

Same feelings as you, my midwife was very nice and I didn't expect to get very different treatment because I had ivf. But when I later had a miscarriage, the response was very blasé....like a 'meh another miscarriage' type response, from midwife unit and from epu. My experience was shocking for any expectant mum, let alone someone who's been through ivf. I have my first midwife appointment next Wed for 2nd ivf bfp, I'm dreading it to be honest!!

[Hidden in reply to Lilli79]

Wishing you loads of luck on Wednesday. Try not to carry the pain of the past with you - although if you work out how to do that, feel free to let me know!

I have been truly shocked by the way the people in caring roles respond to women who are or have miscarried. Just because they see it frequently doesn't mean it's any less devastating for each individual women who experiences it. After I had a scan for my 2nd m/c which revealed I was miscarrying, the doctor more or less slapped me on the back and said 'better luck next time'. When I explained (through tears) that this was my 2nd m/c he just said 'Oh well, happens a lot more than you think.' Awful. Thank god there are some good ones out there! xxx

[Lilli79 in reply to Hidden]

Oh my goodness, what an awful experience you had 🙁 when I had my mc I called the midwife unit and told the nurse on duty. I asked her to ask my midwife to call me back, and she said 'well does she need to?' I was like, jeez, talk about cutting me off with no help at all! Luckily my gp was very sympathetic and put me in touch with epu. They called me and I found them very blunt, I said I had a mc and thought I might need a scan. She just said' well, do you need one - did you see everything come out?' I thought wow, how compassionate!! Needless to say, i never got a call back from my midwife then 2 weeks later she phoned and said she was concerned as I hadn't shown up for my dating scan that day. I couldn't believe it! They hadn't even bothered to pass the message on. In fairness to the midwife she was incredibly embarrassed and apologetic, and we had a long chat. I will as always be positive at my appointment, but it makes me really nervous to trust them with mine and my baby's welfare xx

[Hidden in reply to Lilli79]

God that's just terrible. You really are left on your own with it. Even a few kind words in that situation would help. I've experienced zero compassion on both occasions; I've really lost faith in and respect for the health service. I'm always polite, grateful and compassionate when I deal with people in any walk of life. I don't think it's too much to expect that from doctors and nurses when a woman's having a m/c!

Sending loads of love and good thoughts to you for the appointment xxx

[Lilli79 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for your kind wishes. I just looked at your profile, I think it's really great to be raising awareness about this ❤️❤️

[Tezzabell86]

My midwife is amazing. She has been keeping a close eye on me. She is happy with how the pregnancy is going and she made sure that my obstetrician consultant was the same consultant I had for IVF and we are seeing him next Thursday and my midwife has reassured us that he is extra cautious with ladies who got pregnant through IVF and asks for extra scans to be sure that everything is going ok which is good to hear xx

[Shanks_21]

My midwife although she is nice I don’t think takes in to account we’re having an IVF baby. Long story short I saw her last week as I was waiting on some test results from a suspected UTI, my water sample did contain some white cells however she brushed it off saying it can be normal in pregnancy i of course queried it as I want to 100% make sure it’s nothing to worry about and reminded her of the fact it’s taken us a long time to get to this point and I don’t want to risk anything jeopardising it- she then started asking me out of the blue if I had anything on my mind and if I was well supported at home making me feel like a total nut job and hypochondriac with a rubbish husband to boot! Had to stop myself from getting upset in front of her! Am now dreading seeing her again!

[Kloulou83]

Hi there

I don’t think my midwife particularly cared or gave any special treatment that I had been through IVF. To be honest neither did the hospital either. The only reason I got better care was because I am having twins, so you are under a specialist.

My actual midwife hasn’t been great and since 24 weeks I haven’t seen her as had lots going on at the hospital so was being seen there weekly.

Only thing that does bother me is that sometimes being under hospital care, where they are so busy and stretched you sometimes feel you aren’t getting the answers you want although cannot fault most of the amazing midwives. Xx