HCG levels dropping 😥😥😥

[Amanda86]

Morning everyone

I posted last Friday with my low beta result of 42 and then again the following morning with my fairly strong 11dp5dt pregnancy test.

Unfortunately the cheap tests I use (which have always only shown a light positive) are now showing nothing. My hcg levels are dropping and this will be confirmed tomorrow at my beta.

We are so broken. I remember reading an article saying how uncommon recurrent miscarriage is and yet this forum and my current situation (this will be my 3rd in just over a year) shows me it really is very common.

I know people are only trying to be helpful and kind when they say think positive but I'm really struggling to work out how you manage to stay positive after all that?

I now feel I have no faith in ivf at all. I don't read positive outcomes and think that could be me one day. I read them and think that'll never be me because I just keep loosing babies and I don't know why.

The hospital also apparently won't class anything under 6 weeks that can't be seen on an ultrasound as a miscarriage either which honestly I'm so shocked by.

I dunno what to do. My partner suffers from depression and for his sake I try to stay strong and I remind him that we can get pregnant and I have faith it'll work for us one day. It's lies, I have no faith. I just don't want to upset him by being so negative.

Can anyone recommend anywhere I could have some private testing done and what sort of testing I might be looking to have?

Thank you x

[dexter21]

We are always in this situation together bug loves to u ...I feel ur pain ....I went for my 6 week scan yesterday and no heartbeat.

They said the sac is the size of z 5 week sac n my beta was 2400 which matches a 5 week but I'm 6 weeks .

Apparently this looks bad and they have told me to prepare for the worst ..

We had our miscarriage at the same time last cycle just want to say big loves and I pray for a better outcome for u 💕

[Amanda86 in reply to dexter21]

So sorry Dexter. This is totally heartbreaking 😔 I'm also sending love to you. Xxx

[dexter21 in reply to Amanda86]

I'm totally devastated I know how u feel xxx

[Amanda86 in reply to dexter21]

Of course, I totally understand that. It's a crule world to let people get so far and then take it away from them.

I always believe a path is chosen for people but then I think why would some people be given such a tough path in life? I just don't know 😔 xxx

[Tugsgirl in reply to dexter21]

So sorry for your news too dexter21 xx

[dexter21 in reply to Tugsgirl]

Thank u xxx

[dexter21]

😢😢😢😢😢😢😢xxx

[Cinderella5]

Sorry to hear this Amanda, absolutely heartbraking for you to go through another loss! Im not sure if your clinic has a counsellor, perhaps you could make an appointment to chat to her/him if you feel you cant lean on your OH. I cant help with the tests that you should have, but I know there is some information on the miscarriage association website. I have heard of some women using aspirin for early losses. Maybe have a chat with your clinic to see what they can suggest. Thinking of you!xx

[Amanda86 in reply to Cinderella5]

Thank you Cinderella5, I might see about some counselling with the hospital xxx

[Tugsgirl]

If I could recommend something or say something to make you feel better I would. I am so sorry this is happening to you. The only thing I have to offer is that you are not alone and many of us feel your pain. Thinking of you xx

[Amanda86 in reply to Tugsgirl]

Thank you 😘 xxx

[Tugsgirl in reply to Amanda86]

Amanda I just had a thought; my clinic do miscarriage and implantation failure blood tests. We had it after our first round because we'd had a top grade blastocyst and perfect conditions for success and I'd had a very early stage miscarriage at 28. It cost us £850 but it was worth it for some kind of peace of mind that all my bloods came back normal. Perhaps your clinic will do similar tests? xx

Vicky

[Amanda86 in reply to Tugsgirl]

Thanks Vicky. That's really helpful. I will enquire about this when I have our consultation appointment.

Xxx

[Missy_22]

I'm so sorry. I feel your pain. I know how you feel. Just try and be strong. Speak to your clinic and see what they suggest if not hi somewhere else.

Big hugs xxxx

[Amanda86 in reply to Missy_22]

Thanks Missy. We're away to Newcastle this weekend as it's our anniversary. Think I'll have a few cocktails and let my hair down and hopefully be feeling stronger and ready to go again! Xxx

[Missy_22 in reply to Amanda86]

Have a nice break away enjoy the cocktails I would x

[Hidden]

Really sorry to hear this, I have been through this myself so know how hard it is and how cruel it is. Try seeing the counselor at your clinic who might be able to put you in touch with some support groups or professionals that deal just with this. Thinking of you at this difficult time xxx

[Amanda86 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you button! 😘 xxx

[tiger-cub]

Really sorry that u have to go through this .absolutely feel ur pain. I think im with u that u should get private testing done .

[Amanda86 in reply to tiger-cub]

Thank you xxx

[misswinky34]

I'm really sorry Amanda 🙁 I was hoping it was good news for you. Lots of hugs and love. ❤❤❤

I'm absolutely floored that they don't count anything under six weeks 😱????!!!!! I've never heard of that and if that's true it's disgusting 😡

I've had a friend get investigated for recurring chemical miscarriage? Surely that's even earlier? A pregnancy is exactly that no matter how early it is. This stupid red tape infuriates me!!! My boss lost both her twins , born live for only a few seconds and they refused to give her a birth or death certificate for one of the twins who didn't breathe independently long enough. There was a minimum criteria of breaths he didn't meet. It's caused all sorts of problems as far as burial etc goes. It's totally out of order 😡

[Amanda86 in reply to misswinky34]

I agree it's shocking. A loss is a loss.

It was a nasty doctor who told me anything under 6 weeks that can't be detected on ultrasound wouldn't be classed as a "miscarriage". It wasn't that statement that made her nasty but she gave me a lecture on how pregnancy is a complex thing and basically made me feel like rubbish.

I plan to have a consultation with hospital this time as I didn't last time. Xxx

[WeeMrsH]

My lovely I am so sorry for you. I totally understand why you are feeling so low. Nothing just now will take the pain away. You should push your clinic or your GP to give you a recurrent miscarriage referral. They can do some blood tests to see if there's an apparent cause. Also have you thought about being tested for uterine natural killer cells. There is a good clinic at the University Hospital Coventry and Warwickshire. Have a look for Profs Quenby and Brosens. If you have high levels of uNK cells it could be preventing implantation in your womb. Worth checking if nothing else than to rule it out. You may have to pay privately depending on eligibility but it's not too expensive - around £500 I think.

Look after yourself sweetie xx

[Amanda86 in reply to WeeMrsH]

Thank you. I'll speak with the hospital to see if they're willing to offer any further testing. Already tried my GP before this cycle who told me no 😖

I have seen about NK cells testing. I'm in Scotland and tried to look for places close by but couldn't find much. A place in Glasgow I think did it but can't remember exactly what I read about them, I'll need to look again.

We definitely can't keep going through this and although nothing may be the cause it's the thinking that something could be the cause that's difficult. Xxx

[emmab178]

Oh no, so cruel. So sorry to hear this news. Big hugs to you and hubby x

[Hollibob]

I'm lost for words with the medical professionals!!

I don't believe it is right for them to say that anything below 6 weeks is not counted! You had a positive pregnancy test!

Like some of the others have said, your GP or a different one, with the last one not being helpful, should refer you after 3 for tests. See if you can find any NICE or CCG information on what the criteria is for recurrent miscarriage testing.

After our 2nd IVF miscarriage and 2 others suspected prior to that, we asked the GP who referred us.

Our IVF clinic did offer some blood tests, but I wanted to use the NHS for as much as possible to start with.

Also, have a look at the Tommy's charity page...I know one of the ladies contacted them and they were really helpful. They do research trials as well..,

tommys.org/pregnancy-inform...

It sounds like it would be worth speaking with someone if you can't say what you need to outloud with the other half. You could have separate chats with them?

X

[Amanda86 in reply to Hollibob]

Thank you for your reply. That's really helpful information. I'll definitely have a look at the places you've mentioned.

I hope at my consultation appointment they might agree to further testing. If not I might make another appointment to see a different GP who hopefully will be more understanding and sympathetic than the other one I seen! Xxx

[Hollibob in reply to Amanda86]

Definitely ask..I've learnt you have to fight to get what you want with the medical side of things.

Also, If you google recurrent miscarriage with your local hospital names and see what it brings up...I just did mine and it bought up the gyne dept where a couple of the consultants deal with recurrent miscarriages and also the same with the early pregnancy unit...

If you have this information when you try to get a referral then it might show that you won't be fobbed off. Also I'd go with your other half too x

[Sprinkles86]

So sorry to hear this and to be honest this is something I could have written! We are waiting to test on Tuesday. We had a BFP on our first round but miscarried at about 6 weeks. That was my third miscarriage so although I'm hoping and praying for a BFP I can't help but think it will come away again even if we do get it. Negative thoughts are so destructive..... Thinking of you lovely Xxx

[Amanda86 in reply to Sprinkles86]

Thanks sprinkle. I hope you get your BFP 🍀 xxxx

[Sunnysam91]

Sorry for your sad news Amanda look after yourself xx

[girl15]

So sorry to hear your news, one thing I can only suggest is ask for testing re: blood clotting.. Basically happened to my cousin, you have to have 3 or more miscarriages for them to actually test for it as its so rare. But she then needed injections all the way thro to support the pregnancy and then it worked and she has a little girl, defo worth an ask if that is what it is? X

[Amanda86 in reply to girl15]

Thanks I've asked for it but they've said no as they don't class my last 2 as miscarriage because it wasn't far enough on to be seen on ultrasound. It's terrible. Xxx

[Nesfin]

I'm really sorry for your loss and absolutely flabbergasted by an early miscarriage not counting as one?? It's absolutely heartbreaking and I really feel for you. Get some counselling and push them for any tests they might be able to do, it might be also worthwhile making some enquiries in a private clinic, not all the tests they do are horribly expensive (depends of course on your personal financial circumstances). But before you do all that, or even consider it, take some time out, have those few cocktails you mentioned and give yourselves an opportunity to heal a bit and get stronger. Big hugs xoxo

[Amanda86 in reply to Nesfin]

Thank you. Yeah it's terrible. I'm definitely going to look into some private testing. We can't kee going through this and always wondering if anything so simply resolved could be the cause. If testing revealed all was fine then maybe I could accept that it's just bad luck but just now I just keep thinking it could be something that could be easily fixed and they'll just not to the testing! 😡 very frustrating xxx

[Nesfin in reply to Amanda86]

Completely agree, you need all the tests and some kind of answers and a way forward xoxo