Disappointed with grading - want to stay positive!

[Laura3101]

Hi

Just had a call from my clinic to say my ET is today @ 2pm but after all 7 eggs fertilised to highest grade at day 3 it seems their not so good 1 went to blastocyst but poorly so they discard that one and 5 have yet to do much so they are keeping them till tomoz to decide if they can freeze them but the 1 they are putting back in this morning is a 4cb which I don't think is very good!! Everything till now as gone smooth and the embryologist said grade can change from morning to afternoon to be better & she was very positive that the grade is what they are looking for & is a great result but Im freaking out!!!! 😩😩😩

[Suzannah1985]

Hi Laura,

Just wanted to say that I am right there with you, I'm having a 3dt this afternoon with a 6 cell embie.

After winding myself up all weekend i am pleased to be at this stage and hope that we get the positive outcome we both deserve xx

[Hidden]

Try to stay positive. All the very best x

[Laura3101 in reply to Hidden]

Thank you xx

[Hidden in reply to Laura3101]

It's such a massive rollercoaster this process!!

I'm having a 5 day transfer on Wednesday. The clinic phoned this morning, 5 embryos are doing well and 1 is behind.

I was dreading the call coz have had thoughts they all died 😩

It's such a scary time. I'm willing them all on but it's completely out of our control isn't it😞

Wishing you all the best for this afternoon. X

[Laura3101 in reply to Hidden]

Yeah it's definitely a roller coaster all mine were top grade at day 3 so to be told only one good enough to transfer and the others may not even get to freeze stage was a bit of a shock but it only takes the one to stick doesn't it xx

[Hidden in reply to Laura3101]

It most definitely does.

People keep saying 'take one day at a time'. Which is all you can do coz things can change in an instant!!

As long as we keep moving forward I'll be happy with that! X

[Laura3101 in reply to Hidden]

My fiancee has been really good he's at work today so when I called him a bit deflated he was like don't be disappointed, we have one to put back and stay positive he's a good one sometimes ha ha x

[Hidden in reply to Laura3101]

That's great you have him!! And he's right of course!

I'm doing this on my own but have amazing support from family and a few select friends.

And of course talking to others like yourself really helps. Thanks x

[Laura3101 in reply to Hidden]

Your welcomeHere to talk anytime you need a ear to listen! I'll keep my fingers crossed for you on Wednesday xx

[Busybee88]

I'm sorry that it's not the news you wanted to hear but if the embryologist is being positive you need to tell yourself that too.

It's never easy to stay upbeat when you feel you've had a setback but the best thing you can do for that little embie is to stay strong so that it has a happy body to go into, not a worrying one. Always easier said than done but the embryologists are the ones who see it all so trust their positivity.

Sorry if that really didn't help but know that everyone here is thinking of you and have their fingers and toes crossed! I'll be sending positive thoughts your way this afternoon x

[Laura3101 in reply to Busybee88]

Thank you it really helps to vent on here ha ha I've just spoken to a friend who had ivf at the same clinic and she didn't get told what quality hers were she just took their word that it was a good chance of success and it was she has just had a baby girl a few weeks ago so she's helped calm me a bit too. Xx

[Busybee88 in reply to Laura3101]

Definitely, this forum is great for letting it all out. It's not that family and friends aren't supportive but it's not the same as talking to people who are going through / have been through it all. That's great that you've got a friend who's been through it and had a happy outcome. Sometimes knowing too much is bad for us! x

[MommaBear16]

Hi Laura - it's so hard not to freak out but stay positive my love! Some top graded embryos don't stick and some 'lower' graded ones will thrive! All you have to worry about is taking care of yourself and staying positve.... come on embie!! x x x

[Laura3101 in reply to MommaBear16]

Thank you, I know Im hoping once transfer is done my body will take over and allow the embie to thrive and get those cells multiply and get hatching, Im gonna be postive and just think it will work and not think negative thoughts xx

[MommaBear16 in reply to Laura3101]

It will change tomorrow I'm sure. When we had our first transfer I was disappointed with the quality but once they were snuggled in my mentality totally changed. I hope everything goes well for you x x x

[Jellybeenz]

Just thought I'd give you a good news story

I produced 25 eggs at EC but only 5 of them fertilized and apparently 2 of those were 'abnormal'. I then developed OHSS and was told they would all have to be frozen. By day 5 I had 3 poor quality blastocysts and one 'slow' one still in the running. They froze the 3 blasts, then overnight on day 6 the remaining slow abnormal one also somehow managed to reach blastocyst stage so that one was also frozen. Bizarrely that abnormal one became the best of the lot.

Three months later I had my FET - two blasts were defrosted but weren't great quality. I blanked out the grades because it scared me but the clinic did tell me they 'weren't great but were good enough'. Anyway, I am now 13 weeks pregnant with one of those 'not great' blastocysts and everything looks healthy and normal. So hang in there! It can and does happen. Look after yourself and stay positive xxx

[Laura3101 in reply to Jellybeenz]

That's fab news!! And very reassuring so thank you so much- I've just had my ET done now and on my way home. Embryologist said ️our embie was a moderate one so here's to hoping it sticks and develops and I can also share good news like yourself, hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly x

[Jellybeenz in reply to Laura3101]

Yay! Congratulations on being PUPO. Now just try not to drive yourself crazy with symptom spotting! Wishing you lots of sticky dust x

[Hidden in reply to Laura3101]

Congratulations x

[CheshireKit]

Hope ET went well Laura3101 Put your feet up and take it easy, sending you best wishes and baby dust 🍀🙏🏻 Xx

[Lola675]

So cool to read these happy stories! Happy for ya! xxx

[angellllll]

I am sure things will improve soon for you. Just stay positive and calm. I have generally observed that for IVF it is really important that the doctor you are visiting is professional and knows what he/she is doing. The success rate should definitely be high. It is after this that you should visit them. So I hope you did your research as well. Other than that during IVF, acupuncture helps a lot. Also, in order to deal with your stress try opting for yoga.

[Hidden in reply to angellllll]

Hi angellllll, this post is 2 years old. It's an easy mistake to make, have done it myself x

[angellllll in reply to Hidden]

Oh Thank you for helping me out.

[Laura3101 in reply to angellllll]

I actually did acupuncture through my ivf and I’m happy to say 2 years on from this post I have a 9 month old baby girl 😊

[angellllll in reply to Laura3101]

Congratulations. xxx

[Hidden in reply to Laura3101]

Wonderful news xx