Horrible decisions! ☹

so I went in for my first frozen embryo transfer today. I had 4 frosties, first didn't thaw, 2nd thawed 70% so they thawed a third which was 95% and quickly multiplying and turned out to be better than its class when frozen. Then they asked us to decide on 1 or 2 to transfer! Obviously we'd have the better quality one but the lesser one would be left to perish ☹ they recommend 1 due to its quality, my age and background fertility. We had to decide there and then and although its really upsetting we decided 1 was the sensible option. We also only now have 1 in storage which makes a future FET unpredictable. I knew this would be hard, but I didn't expect to have to make such hard decisions. Fingers crossed this one sticks, not sure I could go through all that again.

7 Replies

  • Fingers crossed you get a BFP especially after such a nerve racking time today.

  • What a really tough on the spot decision! Well done though, you've done it! This infertility journey is more difficult than I could have imagined but the support here is phenominal! Good luck!!x

  • Wow that sounds like a hugely stressful day! My clinic says that transferring one instead of two is to be taken as a compliment on their faith in the one..

    Wishing you lots of luck as you begin your wait xx

  • thanks for your positive comments, this place really does help! Even just to vent your feelings. It was a tough day, and I have changed my mind so many times thinking did I make the right decision. I just wish they'd contacted us before taking the third one out because we would have given it a go as it was good enough to transfer. The thought of it just being left to perish is heartbreaking but I keep telling myself my head has to make the decisions not my heart. I know I'll always wonder if that embryo would have been our baby even though statistically we had a higher quality one transferred. How are we supposed to make decisions like that on the spot?! Trying to be positive but this is so hard ☹ thank you for your support. X

  • Hi embiemomma. It is an extremely tough decision that you have made, so well done!! Rest assured that your embryologist will have given you his/her best advise. Fingers crossed and thinking of you both. Diane

  • thank you Diane, yes someone else said the embryologist must have faith in that embryo, its just so sad 1 perished... I know I'll always wonder if that would have been the one. It makes it worse that my sister in law had a day 2 embryo transferred that was a lower quality one than the one we discarded and their baby is 3 weeks old today! So I know its a possibility. I was wondering if you could explain why on my 5 day blastocyst fresh transfer I was told to test 11 dp, but this frozen 6 day blastocyst I have to wait 14 days?? I can't work it out!

  • Hi embiemomma.It's so sad to lose a little embryo on thawing, but that's the name of the game, I'm afraid. At the end of the day, it's all down to implantation, if only we had some magic "sticky stuff" to keep them in place! Regards to test date, a frozen embryo needs a bit of extra time to wake up properly. Some do straight away, some don't, but still go on to do well. Just think that you probably take a bit of time to wake up in the morning, so do they! Good luck! Diane

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