Headaches and anxiety

[Livinginoz]

I had a midwife appointment today which I thought would help but has done absolutely nothing for me 😞 she offered me no advice on headaches or anything to help my anxiety, just that both were normal. She wouldn’t do Doppler despite me asking and having it once before at EPU.

Can anyone offer any advice re headaches? I’ve had them constantly for five weeks now, some days worse than others. I’m really struggling and trying not to take paracetamol where I can but today has been awful.

She also didn’t offer much when I spoke about my anxiety (including me bursting into tears at one point). She just said to see how I go over the next few weeks.

I just don’t feel today helped at all, I’m feeling worse than ever and could do with some advice. I’m two weeks away from my 20 week scan which feels like an eternity.

Thank you if you’ve read this far! X

[Kate-92]

hello, I can’t offer any advice on the headaches, I did find that I had them more often but just took paracetamol & made sure i was drinking plenty of water. Regarding your anxiety - is it something specific or just the whole pregnancy in general ? x

[Livinginoz in reply to Kate-92]

I struggle with anxiety anyway, but it’s just been another level during pregnancy. It’s nothing specific really, just constantly worried something is wrong. I had potential exposure to slap cheek last week which had me worried sick, have a blood test for that tomorrow. Just seems to be anything and everything 😔 xx

[Kate-92 in reply to Livinginoz]

I understand and I was the same, I commented on a previous post of yours saying that my anxiety didn’t really lessen until I felt baby move & I had reached viability at 24 wks x I do find looking back that it is a vicious cycle especially when you have extra scans. Once you can feel baby, get to know their normal & I hope you’ll find that when movement gets more obvious and you get to know their little schedule that you’ll start to feel better x

[Tnthketnf]

Hi there. I have no advice about the headaches but

I am in a similar position with anxiety. My 20 week scan is in a week. I had a private one 5-6 days ago and the relief lasted until the weekend. It just doesn't get better. I have been told the same about the anxiety that it's normal, most pregnancies cause anxiety etc. At my booking appointment I was told about some potential referral to some sort of psychological therapy after the 12 weeks but then they said 'oh you actually need to contact your GP for medication first'. I tried a couple of times but haven't managed to get through to the GP. I need to keep trying although I am not sure I want to start medication now.

Tbh I haven't been satisfied with the level of care so far. I am surprised at how little understanding there is on the emotional side of a pregnancy after infertility. I was expecting more awareness and support.

And for the medical aspect too. The community midwife service seems to be for routine, tick-box, no issues appointments only and the triage for emergencies only(which I understand) but nothing for in-between. Each time I contacted either service I was made to feel like I was wasting their time.

Anyway all wanted to say is you are not alone. xx

[Livinginoz in reply to Tnthketnf]

The midwife mentioned medication too - but I don’t really want to take it during pregnancy! It really does feel like there is a lack of awareness, understanding and support. I feel like the midwife knew what I was talking about but just offered nothing. I also agree it felt very tickbox - she literally checked nothing to do with baby, she didn’t measure me, listen to heartbeat and it just left me feeling like it was a waste of time.

I also agree about the scans - it’s only temporary relief! I love them and enjoy them so much, just wish they were more frequent.

I hope the next week goes quickly for you! Sorry we’re both in this same crappy boat! X

[Glaedy]

Hi, about the headache - it is rubbish in pregnancy :/ I'm having the same issue but what I found helpful- is too minimise strong smells (somehow they trigger migraine for me 🤦‍♀️) and I started drinking electrolytes and sometimes dissolved magnesium and it helps, also airing my house frequently so it's not too stuff. I also changed all light bulbs to warm light instead of cold because I can't stand it and it also can trigger migraine for me.

Sorry that you don't feel support from your midwife, I'm worried that I will be told the same things today, mentally I am at my lowest, during my booking appointment ages ago now, midwife said that if anxiety etc won't go away to let them know and they will try to do something about it. So if my midwife today won't advise anything I will just call the main unit and ask for help.

Our concerns are valid but it is a shame that we have to fight for them instead of just getting help.

[Livinginoz in reply to Glaedy]

I will try the magnesium and electrolytes, worth a shot!

Hope you’ve had a better experience with your appointment! Xx

[Glaedy in reply to Livinginoz]

I hope it will help!

I wish I could say that they did help me. When I spoke with my midwife about my mental health and how I feel she said that she could refer me to some programe? Or group, something like counselling if I will feel the same on my next appointment- in 8 weeks! 🤦‍♀️ but if I will feel worse I can of course call them and they will refer me sooner.

[raverg]

So sorry to hear that you’ve found no support from your midwife. Most people never see the same person twice and your experience can go from shit to great from one appointment to the next. If you have a more general contact number or email for the team, you could get in touch again and see if you come across someone else with better advice.

But the GP should be able to help with both the headache and the anxiety. I’m on a mumsnet group as well and one of the ladies who is struggling with anxiety was referred to talking therapy and she had no waiting because she is pregnant. She is finding it very useful too, so definitely check this NHS article and resources (nhs.uk/pregnancy/keeping-we... and ask your GP too

With the headache, as someone else has said, magnesium can help or electrolyte drinks potentially, staying on too of your hydration and definitely fresh air now that we’re turning on the heat and the air in the house gets dry and stuffy. I personally get them because of upper back and neck tension, so I visit a physio regularly and stay on top of my stretches and workout. It could also be due to hormones or your anxiety, which must feel exhausting. A Paracetamol here and there is probably fine, but I also use a 4head stick (my midwife said it’s fine) especially before going to bed as it distracts me from the pain and I can fall asleep. Cold and hot compresses too, lying down in a dark room with no stimuli, putting on headspace to relax and work on my breathing.

[Livinginoz in reply to raverg]

I love my 4head stick and often use a cool pack I keep in the fridge which helps. It sometimes takes the edge off but it’s not always enough. I’m going to make a point of trying to drink more water too. Thank you! Xx

[Backagain987]

I had terrible headaches about the same time, I lived on paracetamol, made sure I drank loads, and did warm towels on my neck which helped (I think some of it was tension as I was crazy anxious around this time too).. They started at about 16 weeks and they went at about 20 weeks if I remember rightly. My midwife told me it was really normal and to drink loads of water and try to relax my jaw xx

[Livinginoz in reply to Backagain987]

I’m keeping everything crossed they go soon enough, just so sick and tired of it now! Thank you xx

[Allotmenteer16]

With regards the anxiety, you should usually have access to something called an IAPT service (Improving access to psychological therapies). Commonly you can self refer online and if they know you are pregnant they will often prioritise you. Have a search on goggle for NHS psychology services in your area, hopefully there is something that can help you. Good luck, anxiety is such a bugger, I struggle with it all the time, a constant battle!

[Livinginoz in reply to Allotmenteer16]

I’ll take a look at this. I’ve suffered with anxiety before, it’s just a whole other ball game being pregnant 🙈 thank you! X

[Frankie_28]

Hi, I had terrible headaches from 14 weeks onwards. I would go to bed with one and wake up with it still there. Paracetamol didn't touch them and I didn't want to be taking lots of tablets during pregnancy.

I eventually paid for acupuncture and it was brilliant. I had to have a few sessions to see an improvement, but it made such a difference.

I hope the headaches pass for you soon.

[Livinginoz in reply to Frankie_28]

I can’t believe how many women have the headaches! Im glad they’ve improved for you. Mine have calmed down a bit now, they’re occasional rather than constant now xx