Hi, I wanted to share my long journey into parenthood.
I was born with Biliary Atresia as an infant and eventually needed two separate liver transplants to recover as an adult (my husband first donated half his liver which saved my life, but the connection wasn’t good, and I eventually needed a cadaver liver).
Once my health recovered, we decided to start a family and got pregnant in 2015 with a baby girl, Caitlin but I was diagnosed with a short cervix and unfortunately, my water broke at 21 weeks and there was nothing we could do but say goodbye to Caitlin. We were heartbroken, devastated and depressed. We didn’t want to see anyone. We were surrounded by people who were pregnant or had kids. We were happy for them but sad for us. Eventually, the pain goes away but the memories remain.
On Dec 31, 2015, my husband and I went to Disney world to celebrate New Year’s Eve but more importantly try to move on from what happened. I remember being surrounded by all theses families and crying when the fireworks flew overhead.
In 2016, we got pregnant again, but at 8 weeks, there was no heartbeat. We were again devastated. We went for a checkup to run some tests and found out that I have a blocked fallopian tube. The doctor said that we can keep trying but it will probably take a long time to get pregnant again. Eventually, we accepted that perhaps we could never give birth to a healthy baby. A High-risk patient, double liver transplant, short cervix, blocked fallopian tube, so many challenges to overcome to start a family.
We started to look into adopting as my dad was adopted. The OB-GYN suggested we consider IVF. We decided to try it and began the long emotional journey of painful shots, doctor visits and high costs. My husband who is deathly afraid of needles and blood eventually became a pro at it. After several painful months, the IVF eventually gathered 10 eggs, to 5 fertilized eggs to eventually two egg with PGS (genetic testing), a boy and a girl.
Given the fact that I am a high-risk patient with cervical incompetency, they would have to put in a single embryo. We had a 40% chance of it taking. In Dec 2016, we were blessed and got pregnant. Due to my short cervix, a cerclage was placed, and we were finally blessed with our rainbow baby boy, but we will always think about Caitlin and the daughter that we lost. In late 2018, we decided to put in the last embryo.
I hope sharing my journey can help others who are going through similar hardships. At our lowest, we broke down many times, we were depressed, asking god why us? I remember four years ago on Dec 31, 2015, while the new years eve fireworks rained above us in Disney World, my husband and I cried and wondered if we would ever be able to start a family?
That being said, this New Year’s Eve, I would like to share a short video that we just made
