Bad Dad.

[Dadof2girls]

How can I help my 6 year old daughter? She seems to just hold her poo in. She mentioned before that she's worried it will hurt. Her attitude changes when she becomes desperate to go but just won't push it out, instead it always gets to the point where she's going to burst and does a massive one, but it's never on her terms if that makes sense. The poo seems soft and she always seems positive once it's out, no suggestion of pain. If we're out though it's an issue and I have got annoyed and frustrated with her, which I know isn't helping but sometimes there's just no communicating with her. Is it a control issue? Is it a fear? And how do you help them with this? We went through the laxative routine before but it all came back. Had some temporsry success with reward charts, then she lost interest. Just don't want to keep making it worse for her. Any ideas? Or links on here to similar things?

[Lewhm]

This sounds familiar to what my daughter went through.

My daughter was too scared to go due to the pain, we didn’t realise that she also had a small tear. Every time she went it would get worse, but she would be in so much pain from holding it. (I suffered as a child and remember the pain, difficult as it is, try to be patient and sympathetic).

Is she bleeding when she poohs? If she has a little tear, that could be making it hurt even more and the blood might be scaring her.

We eventually discovered a little video called the “Pooh Nurses” it is really good for you both to watch and it explains in layman’s terms what is happening and how to help. It mentioned disimpaction. We contacted the doctor and they agreed to give disimpaction a go which is giving them movicol satchets daily working up to 12 sachets a day and back down to a maintenance plan. It softens the Pooh so that it no-longer hurts to go and cream can be given if there is a tear.

Tip - if you use Movicol, ask for the plain sachets and mix it with smoothies and hot chocolate to help with the taste.

Hope your daughter gets the help she needs.

[Dadof2girls in reply to Lewhm]

What fantastic advice, thank you. Having gone through the use of Movicol about a year ago we really felt we'd given it a good go but it didn't work. We had no idea about how it was supposed to be used properly, especially the fact that it should be used for at least 6 months once a sense of normal passing is achieved. The 'poo nurse' video was brilliant! We're feeling far more positive about it all today. Going to get a repeat prescription and crack on with movicol tomorrow. We've drawn up a reward chart and got her some treats to help make it all a far more positive experience. That video was the turning point. Thanks for the advice.

[Yaleamanda]

use a stimulant laxative such as senna, this will help with the urge to withhold. Go back on to a osmotic laxative too to keep things nice and soft. Enourage regular toilet sits after every meal. get her to blow bubbles whilst on the toilet, you cant withhold and blow at the same time. make sure she is drinking enough during the day too, water is key.

[Dadof2girls in reply to Yaleamanda]

Thank you, great advice. We're adopting the regular poo times now and tried the bubble idea earlier too. Water is a struggle, we make sure she drinks lots when at home but she doesn't naturally seek out water without a nudge. At school she drinks very little, not sure how to encourage that yet. I mentioned in the previous comment that were going back to longer term movicol use after watching the poo nurses video explaining how and why to use it properly. Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. Really helpful.

[14crosstitch14 in reply to Yaleamanda]

Can a 5 year old use senna? She's no problem taking pills

[Yaleamanda in reply to 14crosstitch14]

Yes it comes in liquid form.

[14crosstitch14]

I use poo goses to pooland, make it like its a party.

[14crosstitch14]

My step daughter has her bum clenched really tight. Gave her fig syrup all week, poohed friday morning. She's just very stubborn won't poo on toilet at all now. Need to give her something that'll really make her go as lactolose isn't working. She won't drink enough either

[Dadof2girls in reply to 14crosstitch14]

I'm no expert here but isn't lactolose meant for 14 year olds and above? Have you spoken to your gp about it? Movicol seems the be the first choice, we've just started yesterday with it again with our daughter. The 'poo nurses' video on YouTube was excellent to explain how it works. And surprisingly when we printed the Bristol Stool Chart from their website and was able to explain it to her (due to the video) she was really interested, described her last poo to us and went and sat on the toilet to try for another one. She has never done this before. It seems information is really helpful for kids. We are thinking about showing her the poo nurses video as was suggested before, but taking it one step a time at the moment.

[Yaleamanda in reply to Dadof2girls]

Lactulose can be given to any aged children, in fact any laxative stimulant or softener can.

[14crosstitch14]

I'm only step mum doctors won't speak to me. Lactolose was prescribed for child and its not diet or fluids. My step daughter is literally stopping herself from pooing. Its very complicated.

[Yaleamanda in reply to 14crosstitch14]

She is with holding and you need a stimulant as well as a softner.

[14crosstitch14]

Thank you for answering, i have looked at loads of different natural things as she's epeleptic. Dulcolax and a sambucol looks like i can get.