16 year old daughter recently diagnosed with frontal lobe epilepsy and started meds

[Sunny1011]

hi, so my 16 year old daughter has recently been diagnosed with frontal lobe epilepsy and started Lamotrigine 2 weeks ago. Her epilepsy team advised her to continue living her life as she would. The other night, she wanted to stay over at a friends house with a few of her friends, I allowed her, her friend are all aware of her condition and what to do in the case of a seizure so although I wasn’t 100% happy with her doing this, I knew she’d be in safe hands and would get the help she needs should she have a seizure…. So, upon awakening at the sleepover she has a seizure, one of her friends called 999 whilst another kept her safe, put her on her side etc, and another called me to let me know what was happening so I went over and met her with ambulance men. She was taken in as per, I spoke with her epilepsy nurse and she said there was no need for her to be at A&E, so she sorted it so we could go. My daughter seemed well in herself, just wanted to relax. Her friends at the sleepover had got a carvery booked for dinner and were then chilling out for the afternoon and parents were picking the teens up at around 11.30pm to go home, so she wanted to go back to her friends. She assured me she felt ok and would ring me if she felt in anyway strange etc. I made the decision to let her but reiterated that this was the last late night for a bit whilst the meds are getting in her system etc. My husband actually questioned me last night as to whether this was bad parenting? It’s difficult, she is 16, not younger where you could perhaps have a little more control so to speak, she’s in that stage, she’s finished school, starting college in September, she’s even got herself a little waitressing job at the local eatery, I’m really proud of how she is doing despite what she has been / is going through.

im not sat here on a Wednesday morning questioning whether im a bad mother?

Honest opinions / advice please? Thank you in advance

[Hidden]

Honest advice ?

- Approach taken by all, including yourself, seems idyllic. Can't imagine anything could be worse than a heavier handed / or a more laissez - faire approach

- Wouldn't rely absolutely on medication, it's useful, but personally have found adjusting behaviour more effective - bit like driving in torrential rain - driving more slowly on bends, will be far more effective than brand new tyres/4 wheel drive or other tech

[carlija2]

I don't think it's bad parenting at all. You all have got to get used to this diagnosis and its early days . The medication needs to get in her system and you can't be with her all the time if she is going to college and her little job. As long as you let everyone know what to do if she has a seizure .

As time goes on she will recognise what might trigger her seizures like late nights etc and she can adjust accordingly.

As long she takes her diagnosis seriously and takes that into account as she lives her life as normal as possible.

I wish you all the best going forward

Jackie

[Justmepound]

As a former teacher I have witnessed many different forms of parenting and am a parent myself. I'm still not sure if that qualifies me to judge how others do it but from my experience you're right down the middle in your approach. That cannot be bad can it?Lamotragine is commonly prescribed in the NHS and was my neurologist's first choice for me. If you read the leaflet that comes in the packaging of all of them they all have a range of side effects. It didn't suit me ( memory and brain fog, balance with reduced frequency) but after being switched to carbamzopine I have had at most only one nocturnal seizure but memory effects even worse.

I still lead a normal life,eg climb ladders, SUP and even responded to help rescue a family group lost in a dangerous zone in the lake District last week. Not everyone can do this. We are all individuals.

I wish you and your family well.