WORK, so annoyed :(

[x_b_x]

Right ok, so I started today feeling all good and positive, but now its just meh thats all I can say. I cannot believe what has just happened.

So here I was typing away at work at my desk the phone rings its the managers PA asking me to go through to her office yikes, I thought maybe it was just to ask if I had heard anything about my Lap in which I am awaiting an appointment for.

Went in sat down she says that some people in my office have complained about me saying I am rude, to hormonal and to busy sat here feeling sorry for myself when they feel like nothing is wrong with me and I am making up excuses for constantly having to get up and have a walk round or have time of for appointments. They have said I am not a nice person and they cannot approach me as they feel they cant, yeah now to right they cant, I am hormonal at the best of times but this has now tipped me over the edge I am so annoyed.

How can I be making all of this up, I come to work most days feeling like crap but now I drag myself out of bed come here and spend 8 hours of the day around these people and now I am getting grief for it.

Has anyone else have the most horrible work situation and have problems with work because of their endo?

I am just so sick of tired of people making me feel like this is all in my head and I am making excuses when I am not. Just tired of people right now, so feel like I need a new job

Sorry for ranting on people just needed so badly to get this of my chest

[squidgy]

Oh hun that sucks! Bless you! No wonder you wanted to rant!

I hope you explained that you have been dragging yourself into work when u feel so rubbish! Print out all that you can about endo and give it to your boss. Showing it is necessary for you to have appointments and to get up and walk around and it does effect mood. Your boss should then tell those idiots who r complaining, not in detail, but yes you are entitled to it due to a medical condition and should respect this. Perhaps, but it may not, it may make them then actually ask you what is wrong! Which is what they should have done in the first place..been supportive and ask if anything wrong and can they help! I bet the ones who moaned are the clique of bossy, chatterboxes and gossip girls! Always is!

I was signed off work on and off due to endo and depression and a certain workplace I was at didn't like it. They didn't understand at all, not even my so called boss! who I ended up having amassive row with and swearing at and then bursting into tears! Gave a little respite from him for a few days. I eventually left as so fed up of their attitude. Luckily I managed to go under the rouse of "relocating" - which I was. But it was a good excuse to go!

You don't say what your boss said about it all? was he/she supportive of you or the opposite of "sort yourself out!". I hope he/she was understanding. If the boss wasn't supportive is there someone higher you can talk to?

Please don't let them get u down. I know not easy. Hold your head up high, you have every right to have the breaks and be absent for appointments. It is their problem not yours.

I know what u mean about feeling like it all in your head and no-one understanding.

I hope tomorrow is better for you xxxxxx best wishes xxxxx

[x_b_x in reply to squidgy]

Hey

Thanks for replying to my blog, meh I am just sat at work now I feel so drained cannot wait to get home, going to get home get on the net and job search I think, although I am going back to college to do night classes in September train to be an agricultural secretary and become self employed wont have any bosses to answer to then haha.

Well it was the boss and his PA but PA does most the talking, she is sympathetic but they do not understand at all what I am going through, she was like be all smiles and nice to everyone, I thought i was been all smiles and nice and putting on a face whilst underneath it all I feel like crap but no someone just cannot come to my face and tell me I have been of with them not that I realised I was been of with someone but instead the fact they ran and opened their mouth to the boss over nothing is stupid, now they expect me to be smiles with everyone I dont think so just makes me not trust anyone at all here now. backstabbing people.

I try and explain to people what is wrong and what I am going through but no they just see everything as an excuse they dont know at all what I am going through. I told them to research up on it but they dont really seem to be interested to be honset, feel like I have no one here I can really talk to, they are just all small minded back stabbing people. Wish I could be in the position where I could just leave until I got something else but really couldnt do that will just have to keep looking until I get something first then leave.

I cannot wait to have my first lap not just to get the reassurance that they are actually now looking into it but then I will have somewhere to go from there and may actually know what has been wrong with me instead of been passed from pillar to post and been told I have all sorts. Least when I have the knowledge of whats wrong I can actually start getting better.

And I know it sounds bad but I cant wait to have it done just so I can get away for a week or two and have a break from work haha, sounds terrible to be excited to go into hosipital but I am so stressed here will be a good break.

x

[jojo777 in reply to x_b_x]

I have a picture/card that says in one page everything about endometriosis and impacts etc etc .Actually when my parents and my husband read it they cried.

It describes exactly whats going on. If I was in your position, I would print it and leave it on these "nice" people desks.

If you want it, send me your email in private message and I can send it to you xx

[x_b_x in reply to jojo777]

awww thats a good idea actually thanks hun I will email you my email address now xx

[Amb43 in reply to jojo777]

Hi jojo, would you be so kind as to send me your picture/card please. I am very lucky everyone is being supportive of me, but for them to read it, and others not so understanding would be a great help, thank you.

I will message you on here with my email address.

Hugs to you xx

[jojo777 in reply to Amb43]

Yes of course pm me your email address xx

[lexharr in reply to jojo777]

Sorry Jojo but please could I have it too? Thanks. X

[squidgy in reply to jojo777]

Sorry to be a pain can I be sent one too? Will email you my email. Thanks xxx

[Sarsarr in reply to jojo777]

Me also pretty please!

[suby101]

Hello x_b_x

I feel so sorry for you some people are just inconsiderate xxxxxs makes me sick! I would aay "you think i'm hormonal? you ant seen nothing yet" haha anyway if you go on the endometriosis uk site you can print off a leaflet! Endometriosis in the workplace, its called shove that in their faces.makes me really angry.dont let the bxxxxs grind you down.you have come this far on your own. xxxx

[x_b_x in reply to suby101]

Hey Suby101

It just frustrates me so much, I am not going to bother with any of them now just going to go in do my work and leave not going to talk to any other unless its work related and thats it, I have had enough of them.

will have to just look for something else and start a fresh as usual x

[suby101 in reply to x_b_x]

Yeah your right.well all the best.xx

[Amb43]

x_b_x so sorry the people around you are so ignorant and share no compassion.

Saw this: If only your ignorance caused you as much pain as Endometriosis causes me,

Ignorance has acure, Endo doesn't.

Much love xxx

[squidgy]

I like that saying Amb43!

Was glad to hear x_b_x that at least there was some sympathy from your PA/Boss. That helps a little bit. I know not much, but better than none.

Yeh wrk sucks even more when u feel like everyone there is a backstabber and cannot be trusted. Been there, got the t-shirt and now ripped it up and burnt it! Don't change who you are. Like you say you have been trying to smile through it, which is hard. Good luck with the going back to college. Sounds like a fab plan.

I hope things get better for you soon. xxx

[CurlyWurlyAmy]

I am a HR officer and I can't believe how unprofessional your manager has been. If someone has a medical condition then the organisational has a duty of care to unsure that they - as far as is reasonably practicable - make reasonable adjustments to support the employee in the workplace.

telling you that people are complaining and saying those things about you is not showing a duty of care.................educating themselves on your condition and educating the rest of the team about endo is a reasonable support mechanism, as is cutting you some slack and agreeing a way for your colleagues to communicate to you when the work environment becomes a bit intense when you are hormonal and agreeing on strategies for you all to work through it.

as for the team making inappropriate comments about there being nothing wrong you - that is unacceptable and unprofessional.

You have every right to put in a grievance about this situation. Do you have a HR department? do you work in a unionised environment?

if you were to resign straight away you could have a case for constructive dismissal - the way you were treated today made it so you couldnt return to the employment

[x_b_x in reply to CurlyWurlyAmy]

We do not really have a HR as such, basically there is one woman that is like HR/PA to the director.

To be honest I do not care with what they have said just shows they are small minded little people that do not give a crap about anyone but their self, why should I let people like that get to me, the girl in question that I know was the one who complained about me is been all nicey nicey to me now, pfft what she expect me to do, complain about me then be my best friend I do not think so I come in and ignore her now and its getting to her haha oh well, should not of gone to the boss about me for no good reason.

I am just going to carry on coming in as usual just going to get on with my work then go home, not going to bother with any of them, just going to keep on with this until I get something else, keep my head held high and show them that anything they say is not getting to me thats the best thing I can do

Hopefully i will get something else soon fingers crossed, and going to college to do night courses and doing some home courses will hopefully help me get the qualifications I need to get something better.

When the PA turned around and said all this stuff to me I just turned around and said, how the hell would they know what I am going through, I come here everyday even when I am in total agony I put a face on and get on with my work I have never had a day of sick in my life and thats because I am a stronger person then them and can get on with my life so how dare they say these things about me, I told her that I have brought every single appointment letter in so how the hell could this be made up, asked her if she thought I was sat at home printing them of haha. She basically went silent and couldnt answer I thought yeah bloody people. Just shows that the girl that complained about me couldnt have the guts to come to my face and ask me why i had been of lately and had to go and cry to the boss, pfft shows how weak she is. x

[x_b_x in reply to CurlyWurlyAmy]

Well once again I am stressed, they had me in the meeting room today once again with the girl in question I had to basically sit there whilst this girl was telling me all my faults, how I am apparently rude to her, I dont like her and I am sharp and everything.

GRRRRR now I am so stressed my tummy has flared up I look so bloated and feel sick and hormonal, I just want to cry right now I want to go home, sick of all this stress.

Dont know why I am been made to look like the bad guy when I have not even done anything wrong even the HR that was sat in there she made me feel like I was in the wrong so in the end I just said I have nothing more to say and want to go, told them I will look for something else.

Cannot believe this, she complains on me then moans again because I am not talking to her, what does she expect me to be her best mate after she has complained about me.

I do not know what to do now do not have the money to quit but do not feel I can carry on here till I find something else, I am so confused.

[squidgy in reply to x_b_x]

OMG! That is so crap! How dare they do that to you!

I bet during that "meeting" the others did not mention that you have endo, that u require time off for appointments, that it affects u day to day. Also I bet u didn't get a chance to say how u feel about the girl going behind your back complaining and not talking to you to actually find out what going on. And that what they are doing now will not help u and make u feel worse cos of the stress. You should not have to leave the job because of other's ignorance!

Oh hun I wish I could fix it for you, or just give you a supportive hug. I can feel your frustration, anger, upset and worry. Been in a workplace with no support from managers or other staff and it sucks!

I would maybe private message curlywurlyamy as her reply to you was fab and being in HR she may have some words of help.

Sending you huge hugs xxx

[x_b_x in reply to CurlyWurlyAmy]

I cannot believe this, today I have a memo sat in my emails from HR we would like to congratulate the promotion of "girl in question" who has been promoted to customer services supivisor, I really cannot believe this, making her my frigen boss. They didnt even ask if I wanted the job in the first place just gave it straight to her and after her complaining on me its just topped the biscuit to be honest. I want to leave here even more now x

[IggiePiggy]

Hi x_b_x

I'm so sorry to hear what a hard time you've been having at work. I think you've made the best decision to find something else and not to get into conversations with these backstabbers. They've got no idea of the pain you're in and the brave face you put on.

This time last year I left my job for the same reasons you have described. It's taken me 22yrs to get diagnosed with endo as I was told every woman had these problems. I struggled into work getting 3 trains each way in agony, working 10hrs plus a day. I had quite a few Drs appointments, scans and the hospital appointments. I produced evidence showing appointment letters. My manager told me it wasn't fair on the team that I was going to appointments. Well it isn't exactly fair on me I have endo.

The final straw came when I had to get a transvaginal scan and I took the day as holiday because I was basically been bullied by senior management. A backstabber I foolishly thought was a friend told my manager I'd been saying I'd been forced to take the day as holiday. That evening my manager sent me a message on my work blackberry telling me she had not forced me to take the day off, how I'd told everyone this and she wanted a serious word with me. Basically she continued to bully me whilst I was on holiday in my own home. My confidence was so low I felt sick.

I went into work the next day and she had a meeting with HR and her where I was totally attacked. I cried uncontrollably and they were so shocked they sent me home. That afternoon had a call from the hospital that they wanted to see me for an emergency appointment. The following day I went into work and resigned and went straight on to gardening leave as I was ill.

The hospital thought I had ovarian cancer and I had a lap in a couple of days. Luckily for me it was only a cyst on my left ovary, a polyp in my uterus and endo in my pouch of Douglas and pelvis.

I so relieved that I'm out of that company! I won't name and shame them but they are a ftse 100 credit reference agency who should be totally ashamed of themselves for how they treated me.

I'm sorry to rant but it makes my blood boil on hearing your situation. Think more of yourself and get out of there as soon as you can. I wish I had thought more of myself but when you're in these situations it isn't easy to think clearly. I one good thing I can say about endo is that it makes us stronger more determined women (although we shouldn't have to be).

I'm sending you lots of hugs. I hope you get a chance to get one respite and rest this weekend.

Angela x

[IggiePiggy]

Meant some respite and rest x