trying to cope with depression

22 years ago I was ill for 18 months with an unknown virus similar to gbs,I had to take medical retirement,I worked for the government so I got two thirds pension(about £600 now)which means I can pay my mortgage.to say I have been messed about is an understatement,everything from the hospital to the state have made my life crap!failing to fill forms in,stopping my benefits, the list is endless.depression has been my constant companion,I have had councilling,had numerous types of drugs,I am on amitryplene now but nothing helps.I also suffer from pts disorder,as I am getting older I am findingr it harder to walk more than a few steps.I have thought about ending my life but I worry about my wife of 42 years and what she would have to do.today is 22 weeks we have waited for a decision whether I qualify for pip(dla)my life is so so bleak!!!!

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  • I'm so sorry you're experiencong such troubles. With depression it's almost impossible to remember that with each bout it does pass. And to look at the positives in your life. There are some. You do have a roof over your head, one that you can afford to keep there - and it's yours, many can't say that. And you have a wife who loves you. I'm certain there's more. Force yourself to write down all the stuff your grateful for - only the positives. Push the negatives out of your mind for at least 5 mins every hour. Do this everyday. This does take effort, but gets easier with practice. Research mindfulness. Whatever physical exercise you can do, do it. However little. Increasing your heart rate and pumping endorphins through your system will better enable you to tackle the depression and negative thought processes. If you can cope with depression you can cope with anything! And you have been doing so, give yourself the credit you deserve. You will find a way to deal with everything else, accept any and all support you can get. I wish you well. X

  • thanks guys for your kind words,feeling pretty low..fell down again!....bruises and scrapes and a big dent in my pride!!!feeling very very tired.its 23 weeks since we had the pip interview,every one I know has been refused,if it happens to me then I will be housebound,apart from the obvious loss of money.the main thing is that some people do not believe me .I am getting too upset now so I will sign off.

  • Hey Tobby1428, my heart goes out to you reading your story. I'm with Kmaria here, the courage you've shown pressing on despite all the challenges, incredible!

  • Don't give yet.

    Try to look for the positive.

    You can also find something that you are intrested in and endulge yourself.

    For me when I am feeling miserable I watch hours of comedy and laugh my head off.

    It make me forget my worries and even fool me that I am blistfully happy.

    After that I am always smilling and even laughs now and again when I remember what was funny.

    You just need to hand in their and take care of yourself.

  • Hello. Any news? If you do not get PIP there are ways of continuing until you do get it, Mandatory Reconsideration and Tribunal, or just starting from the beginning again and getting help to fill the forms in and advice on how to meet the assessor. Let me know if you need some help.

    M

  • forms in!25 weeks on 28/12/2016 awaiting a decision.I actually saw a Doctor at the meeting,I actually thought it had gone really well.

  • Hope it all works out ok. I did a PIP with a woman a couple of months ago and she had a letter to say that it will be weeks before she hears more from them, so she hasn't even had a face-to-face yet. Another one I did with someone else, she had the face-to-face and I supported her but she has still not heard the result. It all seems to have slowed down again. I look forward to hearing from you about how it goes.

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