Alcoholic

[Meantto]

Hi I am trying to give up alcohol. I have been dependent for years now and looking for support to get through this

[HeavyFoot]

That’s a big brave step you’ve taken.

Hang on and there’ll be lots of support on this forum. Good luck.

[Meantto in reply to HeavyFoot]

Thank you

[Rosepetal60]

You may find it helpful to read previous posts and replies for peoples experiences of cutting down & tips etc.

[Meantto in reply to Rosepetal60]

Thank you I will.

[Isinatra]

Hi Meantto. Glad you’re here. I struggled to stop drinking and found the best support system for me was AA, a twelve step program. That is the biggest tool I have in my sobriety tool box, but I’ve added a few more over the years. Drink Free for one. The more tools a person has, the more chances of getting sober and staying that way. I took my first drink as a teenager and finally stopped when I was 53, so I know what life can become by drinking for years. And I’m aware what life would be like if I had continued to drink. It’s not too late for you and wasn’t too late for me.

Have you tried any other support programs?

[Meantto in reply to Isinatra]

Hi Insinatra thank you. I have not tried any support programs as yet. I don’t feel comfortable with the idea of going to an AA meeting as I also suffer with anxiety so if I went to one I fear I would take a drink to give me the courage to face others. Thank you for your kind words and advice though.

My drinking got worse when I was 32 I am now 54. Up until now I had progressed to 8 to 12 cans of lager daily it has nearly destroyed my life. At the minute I am trying to take each day as it comes, boy it’s hard though😔

[Isinatra]

I understand social anxiety. I,too, have the fear of walking in to a group of strangers or heck even friends, but I went anyway because I had run out of options. Luckily,I found a small cozy group I could tolerate. The lights would be turned off, candles would be lit and it became an anxiety reducing environment. It was a womens group. Not all groups are large and overwhelming, but I made myself go to those on occasion anyway. Now there are online AA/twelve step programs available to help, which weren’t in existence when I finally stopped drinking. There are also zoom meetings and just chat meetings. We’re having a meeting now because it only takes two to have one. These are suggestion only and only my experiences. You will take the steps needed when you are ready. I wouldn’t be here talking to you now if it wasn’t for AA, though. 😊

[Meantto in reply to Isinatra]

Thank you so much for your advice and for listening. I will have a look into the options and see what’s available

[Isinatra in reply to Meantto]

How are you doing?

[Meantto in reply to Isinatra]

Hi Insinatra

I am not doing too bad thank you. I still feel really lousy, I think for me the headaches are the worst I feel like I’ve had a very heavy session every night!!

I am now on day 11, I haven’t touched alcohol and am persevering with that even after my partner having a massive go at me the other day for being in bed.. for me there is no where else to go but I won’t go into that it’s a very long story and I’m trying to focus on my not drinking.

I have been to a few A.A. meetings again on zoom, there is a 24hr one and the last couple of days I have found myself on there for a number of hours just listening. I don’t feel ready to talk on there yet but am trying to build the courage up. I’m still not sure it’s the right thing for me it is very much based around God and spirituality but I’ve stayed on listening and joining so something must be right hey?

Thank you so very much for checking in on me 💕. I truly appreciate that.

I hope you are okay and enjoying the weekend. Happy Easter and take care.

[Isinatra in reply to Meantto]

The part of your update that jumped out at me was the staying in bed part and you not wanting to talk about it and it’s a long story. I had a long story too that gave me the reason to continue to drink. Yes, the words God and spiritualism is used loosely in AA. But belief in a God is not required nor being spiritual in a religious way. I’m an atheist and I made the program work for me. It does help to have an understanding that humans aren’t all knowing or know everything about themselves. It helps us with what I like to say is humbility . A combination of humility and humbleness. Your higher power can be anything than is greater than yourself. I chose AA and Mother Nature after a long time thinking about it. The more you listen,the more you learn about yourself and alcohol. In the beginning of sobriety, it’s more important to listen and you’ll share when you feel comfortable. I think your partner would benefit by going to Al-Anon to understand what you are going through. It’s difficult when partners don’t understand. I went through that myself. I consider myself spiritual, but in my own way. I care for my fellow man to the best of my ability. That’s what spiritualism means to me. You’ll find your own. I thought about that for a very long time, too. Years….but in the meantime I kept going to meetings even when my anxiety and depression was so bad all I wanted to do was bolt and run.

You’re just beginning and it will get better. Most of all, be kind to yourself. You deserve it. P.S. Hydrate and take Tylenol for your headaches. Anxiety can cause headaches, too. A little therapy might help. (I had to throw that in 🤭)

[Meantto in reply to Isinatra]

Thank you so very much for your kind words. They truly are inspiring.

Thank you for sharing on the higher power, I hadn’t thought of it in that way and that actually makes more sense to me put that way.

My partner would never go for that he is an alcoholic too and would never consider himself one or even recognise it. That’s the reason I started drinking going out with him and it became more and more...

I’m not good with tablets at all but thanks for recommendation. I’m drinking more water and cutting back on my coffee at minute to try help. I guess this is the way it goes to start with and I know I have a very long way to go it’s early days lol

Take care of yourself too.