my husband had a heart attack, now im scared to leave his side, what do i do

[jad5]

[smithy]

Hi there,

I've had 2 MI's, and was working away from home at the time. Needless to say my wife was very anxious when i got in the car on a monday morning.

I fully understand your anxiety, but if he's had the correct treatment, and his consultant is happy that he returns to a 'normal' life, then you must try and let him become independant again.

One of the biggest issues i have is that every time i take a deep breath my wife thinks something is wrong. I understand her concern, but i and maybe your husband find this very frustrating.

It will take a while, but please try, and ask him to let you know if he's having issues, that way you can support him whilst not having to worry.

The MI is not the end of the world, as long as the cause can be fixed, indeed there are many people i have spoken to who have had triple and quadruple by passes, who say they feel like a new 'man'.

Good luck,

Tony

[jad5 in reply to smithy]

thankyou for your kind words

[jake1 in reply to jad5]

Hi,i can fully understand your anxiety.My husband had a heart attack 14 years ago and a quadruple by-pass 2 years later and it still seems like yesterday.Can i firstly say my husband is in great health and hasn't looked back since his recovery,and i hope and pray that you will be able to say the same in many years to come.I couldn't give you any medical advice,although when your loved one is going through any serious medical condition you read that much information you either feel like an expert or totally overloaded with it.However,i hope i can ease your mind and tell you that it is totally normal what you are experiencing now while your husband is recovering.I can still remember watching my husband out of the corner of my eye to make sure he was breathing when he was reading the paper,and sneaking my hand onto his chest when he was asleep.The worry is enormous and only time will heal both your husband and your mind and i promise it will get easier.My advice would be to just take one day at a time and there will come a day when you realise that nothing has happened when you popped to the shop.If you can't bear to leave the house then don't until you're ready,work in another room for longer periods,and when you're ready to leave him alone then just go out for a short time to begin with,building the time up as and when you feel ok.If you work then speak to your employers about extended leave as you won't be any good to them for a few weeks anyway.There are no rules to follow,however,your husband will get fed up of you watching his every move and you need to explain that you need time to adjust as well as him.Be prepared also for your husband to feel very low,even depressed,and the health professionals will be able to advise on that.I wish you and your husband my very best wishes for a long and healthy life.x

[jad5 in reply to jake1]

thank you and your right he is very down at the moment

[Mike262]

Hi, I know it's all very worrying, but you don't really say what treatment and tablets have been prescribed. Usually the Drs give you a GTN spray for use if your husband experiences angina symptoms which is usually wind in the top of his chest I.e. shortage of oxygen to the lungs due to a poorly performing heart.

You should ask for support from your local Cardio-Rehab Team who are normally very good at assisting you and your husband to releave your anxieties.

Best wishes,

Mike262

[jad5 in reply to Mike262]

he has two stents and is on all the right medicines and has the GTN spray but all that is not stopping me worrying

[jad5 in reply to Mike262]

thank you, i have know contacted the rehab nurse

[smithy]

As Mike said, If you have not been referred to a Cardiac rehab Nurse/Department, then contact the hospital where your husband had the procedure, and ask that they refer you.

You both will be able to attend the educational stuff and one of the nurses will go through your concerns and help to put your mind at rest

As Mike said we do not know exactly what was wrong with your husband, and can only go on our own experiences. I was clearing snow with a shovel 3 days after my first angioplasty, and was never off work for more than a week after any of them.

The teams are Very Good so please make the contact.

[jad5 in reply to smithy]

thank you, i have contact with them know

[2squirrels]

If your husband has been signed off from the hospita; then he is in far better shape than before he had his heart attack and extra stress is bad for bot of you. My husband had one last October and although he has been passed as healthy he has had to slow down. If you stress he will worry more which is not good for either of you. Try hard to make the most of him being caught in time as many are not and enjoy the rest of your lives together - do things together while you can make some more special moments. If you can't do this you may need some councelling to help you cope but I thank my lucky stars that we have another chance.

[DakCB-UK in reply to 2squirrels]

I think 2squirrels is spot on. At least now you know.

Also, now the attack itself is over, this is a chronic illness, not an immediate threat to life, and I think one of the biggest challenges with a chronic illness is not letting worry about it ruin your lives.

We're all going to go some time and you've now got a pretty good measure on one of the most common killers - like 2squirrels has said, many are not so lucky. It's an opportunity to take simple steps to postpone it and enjoy more time together, which should be a reason to smile.

[jad5 in reply to 2squirrels]

same hear i am so happy that he has another chance

[Hidden in reply to jad5]

Son in his mid 30s had heart attack (two stents) last year, really shook him up as thought he was fit. British heart foundation gave loads help and reassured him. Previously my husband had heart attack and no help re giving him confidence. (big difference) As for you try not to be over concerrned if possible, its you that needs to feel he will be ok really soon.

[tezfox]

If you need to talk just email me at [e-mail] I have done so much with my life in 23 years you would not believe it, Heart attacks are a wake up call? He is still Here!!!