Feel Good Friday

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi everyone how’s it all going? I want you to know and remember today that you are loved, your life has value and you amazing!

I recently read on my social media feed about self-compassion. I asked myself what is self-compassion? According to Dr Kristin Neff (2018, Associate Professor Human Development and Culture, Educational Psychology Department, University of Texas at Austin), in the same way, we show compassion, empathy, understanding, and love to others who are suffering, so self-compassion is an ability to give to ourselves the same love, empathy and understanding when we are suffering. Concepts like this are not new, and many wise folks and philosophers through the ages, have similarly said that we need to, ‘Love our neighbour as ourselves’. It may sound selfish, but how can we show compassion to others, unless we love ourselves first?

According to Kristin Neff (2018), there are three elements to self-compassion: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. Self-kindness is accepting that we are human, that we fail, that we experience pain and difficulties, and instead of beating ourselves up about it, we cut ourselves some slack and show ourselves some warmth and understanding. Common humanity is acknowledging that we all share the same struggles, failings, and difficulties and that we are not alone. Mindfulness in this context is a ‘balanced approach to our negative emotions so that feelings are neither suppressed nor exaggerated’ (Neff, 2018). We acknowledge in, ‘mindful awareness’ (Neff, 2018) those negative thoughts and feelings in this moment, as just that, thoughts and feelings, with openness and non-judgement, and then let them go.

So let us start to learn how to show ourselves self-compassion, so that we are then empowered to be compassionate to others, especially to those for whom we care, as we often need to draw from the deep well of our internal resources, especially at our more challenging times.

Sending you love and blessings today.

MAS Nurse

References:

Dr Kristin Neff, (2018) Self-Compassion.

self-compassion.org/the-thr...

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Hi Mas_Nurse,

As a practicing Buddhist, I do endorse all that you have mentioned about self-compassion. In our loving kindness meditations we always start by wishing ourselves health and happiness, because only when you are centred can you begin to really let that compassion flow to others.

And unconditional love, especially for those people or things who have harmed you in some way, whether intentionally or unintentionally, is a great thing to foster, because it increases your capacity for compassion. To err definitely is to be human, too. We aren't perfect beings.

Thank you for your love and compassion, and in turn I would like to add mine, to radiate the feeling a little bit further.

Hope everyone survived last week OK, and my blessings too for a good weekend and the week to come.

[Hellebelle]

Thank you! Feeling very low today and giving myself a hard time over regrets I have. This came just at the right time to question my thinking. Hope everyone has a good weekend and find some time to be kind to yourselves x

[sassy59]

A lovely post MAS_Nurse and I agree, we do need to be kind to ourselves as well as others. I will bear that in mind for the future.

Feeling better this week and enjoyed celebrating Petes birthday yesterday with family.

Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend. Take care all. Xxxx