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Ask me Anything - caring for a loved one

Are you caring for a loved one and need some help navigating the social care system?

Do you have a situation a care expert could help you with?

Our social care expert Lynn Osborne will be LIVE on the Care Community on Thursday 26th April.

Submit your questions in advance by replying to this post, or join us live!

The Simplyhealth Team

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Hello Lynn,could I ask you for some advice to do with my son,in his mid 20's who is my carer. Although he never says anything, I know as his mother,he is tired and worn out and his horizons(in my opinion) don't look as though things will get any better. I have severe COPD,depression anxiety/panic attacks and pulmonary hypertension. He is my world and we have only grandparents who are in mid 90's so cannot even be expected to give any respite for him. Is there anywhere/anything that he could perhaps get some very much needed respite. He is so protective although my best friend could stay over for a couple of days if needed. Unfortunately we only have government benefits to rely on,so its all rather a mess. Your advice would be extremely welcome.

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I am not sure that there is an answer to my situation. I have been a carer for my husband, suffering from Parkinson's and limited mobility from an injury to his spine. The care agency that I use, is unable to send the same staff because of staff leaving and retention, I have used this Agency for the last ten years. I am reluctant to change providers because starting afresh for my husband would be very emotional. His condition is getting worse and he needs carers that are aware of Parkinson's deterioration.I have spoken to the provider and the answer is staff shortages. This is making Brian's anxiety worse. It is causing me much concern. I am having a week away with family and organised a sleepover plus visits four times per day, I have done this before, This time because of staffing difficulties there are 9 different carers.

The obvious answer is change providers. I feel that Brian could be at the end of his life and presently his quality of life at home with me is good. We have been married for 63 years. I do need a break to continue caring for him. I am strong but getting old myself. I consider us lucky to have a nice home and pensions to pay for support. Family help me dealing with finance, advice on maintenance of daily living.

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I am in a similar position .I desperately need a few days away .My husband has Parkinson's and mild Dementia and is very difficult to look after. I don't have an agency at the moment but do have a cleaner once a week and a man to help with the garden.

I don't know who to contact to get further help. We have quite good pensions and some savings.

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Hi Lynn. My husband is a young disabled man who has qualified for a package of care 4x per day in England. I have not taken this up as I prefer to do the care myself as a trained nurse. However, can this not be converted to helping in our property such as garden mowing? I have asked this of Social Services and do not get a straight answer from them at all! They say the care needs to be for the welfare of my husband which it would be as it is his property and his garden. Can I have a definitive answer on this please?

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Do residential care homes need to be registered to take in dementia residents. Regards Jan

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Hi Lynn. My husband is a young disabled man who has qualified for a package of care 4x per day in England. I have not taken this up as I prefer to do the care myself as a trained nurse. However, can this not be converted to helping in our property such as garden mowing? I have asked this of Social Services and do not get a straight answer from them at all! They say the care needs to be for the welfare of my husband which it would be as it is his property and his garden. Can I have a definitive answer on this please?

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Hi everyone, thank you for posting your questions. We have created a new post which you should see at the top of the forum. Lynn is replying to your questions on there.

Simplyhealth Team

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Hi Again Team , I've just come back last night after a wee break as i was ready for collapsing with exhausting. Tried to chat to my mum re some of her issues but got nowhere really. She has told me to leave in the past a few times, I actually went to the housing but they said I wouldn't get a house as I was making myself homeless. Not even back 24 hours and feel really down again. I live in Glasgow Scotland, I've contactedthe socialwork department to see if I can be appointed a social worker regarding this matter , I want the social worker for myself not my mother, I suffer from depression and migraine to this is impacting my health, do you think there's anything else I can do to resolve this. Thanks

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how do I claim carers allowance as I am looking after my wife for the last four years.and now pay for help

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