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Help caring for a stroke victim

Help! A very good friend of mine, male 67 and previously very fit and active, suffered a major stroke August 2016. He is still in rehab and has 2 months left. Intellectually he is fine but has suffered massive motor function failure. His bungalow is ideal to convert for his needs but due to the level of his immobility it has been suggested he may have to move to residential care as he requires 2 carers to move and attend to him. This will be a disaster for him and his wife.

His wife is early 60's and physically very fit and willing to give him 24/7 care.

Are there any training courses anyone can suggest so that she would be a qualified carer and then only one other carer needs to be funded either privately or through NHS pathways.

All ideas welcome.


6 Replies

I wonder if a phone call to social services could help you, robjones. Explain the situation. At least, they could provide aids around the home, and probably could suggest contact details for training.


Hi Paul

I think the first thing is to be realistic on the gentleman's needs not only now but in the future, his wife is able now but moving a person is tiring on saying that I fully commend and would only support him coming home because I'm sure he will thrive and as a couple they will be truly happily at his home than in a residential home

Training courses? ask local council or a local care company there are guidelines for cares it's called a moving and handling course she will have to pay but will then receive a certificate. As far as a qualification is concerned you can do on line courses but quite honestly a lot of things are very PC focused protecting a vuneurable adult etc well I presume the lady wouldn't allow a stranger in her house etc it's different situations for carers going into people homes than a wife looking after her husband and quite honestly what can't beat true love?

Help once the gentleman returns home (they may get assistance for needed adaptation of the bungalow) it I think depends a lot on their personal circumstances

There are many care agency's out there (sadly not all care) Go to the care quality commission website and look up the reports which can reflect on the company I sound a bit cynical as sometimes the visits are announced so they have time to "get their house in order" but this does state it on the website

Some councils run an "approved personal assistant" scheme this means they have attended certain courses be good if anybody has done a life after strokes course (run by the stroke association) another organization to contact. If your local council does the PA scheme check they have a recent DBS and it would be good to perhaps have at least 2 to cover sickness and holidays

I hope the above is helpful these is an awful lot to get through but you sound like a good friend

Dealing with social services is a nightmare and I would suggest you keep a log of who you spoke to what was said etc especially any time promises

Keep strong best wishes


Many, many thanks.

I will pass the info on to his wife


Hi my husband had a stroke 2 years ago next month. We moved into a flat so I could care for him We get 2 carers 4 times a day , which I worried about but u get used to it and they become ur friends ! My social worker was amazing , got a new one now. Again very helpfull . Write everything down , take names and try to have someone with you as it's all too much on ur own! My hubby also has brain damage along with complete left side paralysis, so can't really get out and I am house bound with him as he can't be left . So take all the help u can get , never say no to anyone who will let u out ! And leave lists for them! Get respite when u need it . They will be fine and u will worry more than they do! All the best , trish


Paul you sound like a very good friend. I think your idea of adapting the bungalow is a good one. It should be started asap though.

I don't know if you realise how taxing it is to be a full time carer? My husband needed 2 carers as he was unable to walk. We don't live in a bungalow but managed with various aids supplied to us. However it really took it out of me despite having 4 visits from 2 carers each day. I would never have managed alone or even with one carer. I still had to help the 2 carers who came to him.

He eventually got pneumonia and ended up in hospital and then in a Care Home whilst we waited for funding for a Nursing Home or for him to come home. The funding comes via the local CCG which is part of the NHS. Unfortunately he got pneumonia again and aspirated this time. He sadly died 3 weeks later.

You need to get in touch with the local CHC in your area via his doctor or the community matron who works with district nurses may help. She/he will have to do an assessment to see if he qualifies.

They will probably fund his care as he sounds in need of more care than his wife can give him. Sorry but that's the reality. They can fund carers to come into the home which I am sure would be better for him.


Many thanks for your advice and please accept my sympathy on your loss. I will pass this good advice I am receiving on to his wife.

Thanks again


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