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Change of personality with dementia?


My father has vascular dementia and possibly Alzheimer's along with other health issues. He has been in a nursing home for just over a year. I find it remarkable that he can appear at times as if he doesn't have dementia and is also a lot friendlier and happier than ever before in his life (as far as I know of course). He is still quiet with me but not with some of the carers in the Home. Am I missing something or is this normal with dementia?


3 Replies

Hello klr31,

Yes, I'm afraid this fluctuation and variability can be part of the picture with dementia. You may find this information helpful on the Alzheimer's UK website which explains in more depth about Vascular Dementia. They also have a national helpline which you may also find useful to speak to someone with more expertise.


Hope this helps. It can be very frustrating as a relative one trying to come to terms with these distressing changes in our loved ones.

Take care.

Best wishes

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Thank you. Do you think people always go the opposite way to how they were when well? My mum had Alzheimer's and became very vulnerable and meek which wasn't like her as she was always vivacious and outgoing. Now dad has "a twinkle in his eye which I never saw.



Hi klr31,

I guess this is the hardest part of dementia in a loved one, that personality does change. Most often it becomes more aggressive, but that's not to say it's the only possible change that can occur.

I think it's a good sign that your dad seems to engage more with his carers in the Home. It shows he's, (for now), accepted the new status quo and that he doesn't find them threatening. But hard I guess, for you to see that new bond, when he's a bit quiet with you.

Probably the only way forward is to learn to accept each of the changes that occur in your dad on a day by day basis. It's sad and not easy, but is a part of the whole challenge of caring for a dementia victim.

Very best wishes.

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