Hubby discharged from hospital but so many issues

[mrsstrider]

After 6 weeks, hubby was released from the hospital yesterday, which is great, but....

Due to medications he is on, he has no bowel control and very little bladder control. Whilst in hospital he was kept in adult nappies but they haven't provided any to him. This is affecting both of us mentally. I bought some Tena Men but they just aren't enough. I don't know who to turn to to get some hospital style ones for him.

During the 6 weeks, he was kept pretty much in bed due to a couple of falls in the first week, but given no physio therapy and is now home struggling to get up the stairs to the bathroom, so even if he knows he has to go, the chances of getting there in time are slim to none.

We don't have a walk in shower, only a bath and i don't have the strength to lift him in or out of it and with the bowel issue, he needs regular bathing.

We had actually been into the hospital to see him on Sunday and talking to the duty doctor who said minimum of 4-6 weeks before discharge and a home assessment would be done before he could be released and 48 hours later i get a call to say that patient transport had just picked him up and could someone be at home to receive him.

I thought i had found all of his secret stash while he was in hospital, but when i went to have a bath, leaving him on the sofa with our 9 year old, he made it to the kitchen and found a bottle of vodka i had missed and poured a drink. He had been home less than 5 hours and i know he was told that he had a decompensated liver and that it would kill if if he drank but he did it anyway.

I have been given no care plan, I have no family nearby and I can't get anymore time from work...I just don't know what my first step is...would really appreciate a direction if anyone has one, please

[BritishLiverTrust3 Administrator British Liver Trust]

Dear Mrsstrider,

If you would find it useful to talk things over, our nurse-led helpline is open Monday to Friday from 9am to 3pm on 0800 652 7330 (excluding bank holidays)

Best wishes

British Liver Trust

[Kristian]

Did he discharge himself, lol. Seems very strange this has just been dumped on you with no follow up plan.

In terms of some suggestions. I note that Trust has suggested you give their helpline a call. This would be a good first step as they will probably be better able to advise on a course of action than any of us could.

For at home care, speak to your gp and see if you can get some district nurse support or some community care support. You may actually be able to do this through adult social services at your local council too. They will probably need to be involved for any in home modifications anyway and they are really helpful with those aspects of need.

In terms of nappies, then speak to your local pharmacy. They may have something more appropriate than the off the shelf stuff.

From a discharge point of view it may be worth speaking to PALS at your hospital. They may be able to help get you a conversation with his medical team to get some better discharge information for you. This should've been provided anyway, but I'm sure that the folks on the Trust helpline will be able to advise you better on that front.

Good luck

[mrsstrider in reply to Kristian]

Thank you.

No he didn't discharge himself. He'd been in acute medical for 6 weeks waiting for a bed on Gastro, got the bed on Sunday and it was the ward that rang at 6pm on Monday to say he has passed the physio assessment. Turns out the physio assessment was 10 steps on the level with his walking stick and 3 stairs using hand rails.

I think he is as confused as I am and to be fair, the nurse that rang me also said she was just relaying the information but was surprised that it was happening so soon

[redpoint72]

Hello love.Crikey, what a difficult situation your in,you have my empathy.

I really would be calling the ward,from where he was discharged, assuming he was discharged? You deserve a full explanation as to why he was discharged, when doctor said several more weeks stay in hospital, what has changed since the chat with the duty on call doctor??. Please speak with your gp as he should have been given discharge notes,with all information that was required for him to be dealt with at home..although this is also done electronically, straight to gp

Again speak with your gp regarding the adult nappy situation, and things need to happen quickly regarding that. Oh the dreaded drink!!! Been there. I assume that you have thrown the vodka away?? If not ,please do it for his own sake. You have alot on your plate....he also has to play his part love...simple as really . What a shame that he wanted a drink after coming so soon out of hospital. Does he need help with stopping? Again, the hospital could or should have helped with this,as well as regarding physio.

Please explain your full situation with your gp.

But your husband does need to be fully compliant with his medical team,and stop the drink.

I wish for things to improve for all concerned.

Take care love.

My best.Chris

[Roy1955]

If he is too ill for you to care for him you might consider that it's not unreasonable to call for an ambulance and his readmission to hospital.

[MrsWorried]

You poor thing. What a total nightmare. Definitely head to the GP and say you can't look after him at home without care package, it was an unsafe discharge from hospital. Local district nurses can arrange for commode, walking frame and pull up pants. There should also be community alcohol / addictions team but GP can co-ordinate this. Local council may be able to help with care plan, and any additional benefits you could claim. Also there are organisations that offer support for carers. Thinking about you xx

[Aotea2012]

Very sorry to read this. Sadly, many hospitals are so overwhelmed that earlier and earlier discharge is becoming normalised. As others have said get in touch with his GP. They will be able to make connections for you with care provision…which he sounds like he needs as well as being able to help with toilet consumable such as nappies and pads. The most important thing you can do is to make sure he doesn’t start drinking. He will have been through a detox in hospital and the last thing he needs is to undo all that work. He sounds like he could do with support around drinking…if he’ll accept help there is plenty available. Again the GP will be able to advise.

[Charlieathome]

Hello, I am sorry to see you are having a tough time. I have only just joined this forum and am finding it a great help. Regarding the nappies, you could possibly try Age UK they have an off shoot for a better word, Age Co. They supply nappies, different sizes, and bed pads which you might find helpful too, they look reasonably priced..it may be worth a look.