Hello, my brother-in-law has liver damage/cirrhosis. He lost weight, has ascites (better now), and yellow eyes. Ascites diagnosed and treatment started 2 months ago (water pills). Now he has stopped alcohol except 1-2 beers a day. Can beer be dangerous to his health?
I am worried as he can't stop alcohol completely.
Plus, he refuses to see the doctor!!! I don't understand the reason why he would do so.
Any advise how to help him stop drinking? He gets irritated if we advise too much and I am afraid he would drink more if we insist more. He says he will leave alcohol completely slowly.
Thanks all...
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digitalhetal
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Sorry to hear of your brother in laws illness. Now he has a diagnosis of cirrhosis especially at the more severe end of the scale with symptoms of decompensation then he is on a very slippery path even drinking a low amount of alcohol. He will certainly not recover to any degree if he is continuing to assault his liver.
Unfortunately you can only offer him support, you can not force him to quit and it may be that it isn't in his power to quit without medical support but if he doesn't then cirrhosis will sadly almost inevitably claim his life.
At this stage a lot of people with an alcohol dependency are in denial, perhaps suffer shame or guilt and there seems to be a barrier against seeking medical help. But, medical help is needed here, first to try and deal with whatever has caused him to drink, to deal with the addiction and to help with his health. We have many members on here who have gone all the way to transplant due to an alcohol related liver disease but that can only be offered when someone has made the commitment to stop drinking, have a proven period of 6 months (minimum) sobriety and a pledge to not drink going forward.
You can find information on alcohol related liver disease and cirrhosis of the liver at the BLT website & you might find support for yourself and the rest of the family from Al-anon which is a support group for the loved ones affected by anothers drinking habit.
Yes, he’s definitely dependent on alcohol and would be well advised to quit, but with those health issues, he must quit. One or beers a day is already a hefty amount for a healthy person. Yes, beer is as bad as any alcohol.
I was dependent for years and didn’t like the nagging. It’s incredibly hard to quit, but you are 100% doing the right thing by continuing to nag. He won’t quit slowly. No one does. He’ll either quit 100% or carry on. Keep on trying as it could make all the difference,
Additionally, our 'Living with liver disease' publications states; If you are, or have ever been, alcohol dependent or an alcoholic, discuss this with your doctor. In these circumstances it is important to get medical help to give up drinking, as stopping suddenly can, in some cases, lead to severe withdrawal symptoms, including hallucinations and seizures. There are many sources of support and help they can give you or direct you to.
You may want to have a look at the NHS website pages on alcohol;
If he already has sought medical treatment, they would have advised him to gradually taper off over a 30 day period. If he was drinking heavily, well over 100 units a week, then stopping suddenly is dangerous. But from what you are saying, he needs to make the next step into stopping completely.
If his partner accompanies him to his medical appointments, it would help to find out what is going on.
But with cirrhosis, carrying on drinking alcohol is a very serious situation. He will have a limited life expectancy.
My sister went for the appointment with him. After a month he was supposed to do blood test and then meet the doctor but he didn't go for the blood tests. My sister has been trying but how can you force an adult into doing things?!
He has already been told on face that he can't live longer if he continues drinking. I am seriously hoping he stops drinking and seeing that he has decreased his drinks seems kind of hopeful but he can't continue drinking even that much is a reality.
I pray for a miracle!
He doesn't even accept that his eyes are yellow. He is in denial state.
I can relate to your Brother in law you think you feel OK so cutting down should make it go away. I was also in denial but eventually went to the doctor after family were very worried. This was just over a year a go and I fell very ill but fortunately I was able to have a transplant as I abstained from alcohol completely and I am now 6 months post transplant feeling like a new person and realise I have been given a second chance of life. As hard as it was to accept I am living proof that it was the right decision. I hope you’re brother in law has the courage to get the help he needs.
The truth is if he doesn't stop drinking it's only going to go one way downhill very quick and will never improve it has to be total abstinence and I'm sure his doctor would tell him the same that's all I drank was beer I've had to stop altogether myself its definitely not easy I'm waiting on a scan myself but needs to stop simple as that though not easy to do goodluck
There is. But if he has cut down to a couple of beers a day then the physical side will not be as bad as when he was drinking full tilt. The first three days are the worst. He will feel agitated, irritated🥺, there will be some sleepless nights and some very vivid dreams, the dreams happen in the first week. There can be sweats throughout the day and night, doctors will tell him there is also a danger of having a fit due to the withdrawal. Having fits carries a very very low percentage, so that is unlikely.
But, to be honest having someone staying with him for the first five days may be a good idea.
That is mainly the physical side.
Some some even go into a detox program in hospital he we can do it at home and they are given drugs such as temazepam or diazepam to help with withdrawal. Even with the help of those drugs the medical community try to make sure you don’t end up giving up one addiction for another, so the withdrawal drugs start in high doses they are whittled down over seven days. Considering he has been reliant on alcohol for so long that may be the best avenue.
I did this, it did not work. I was told to cut down my alcohol consumption, I was drinking so much that was easy and I did not have to lie but I was still drinking far too much. Sorry for going on.
That brings me to the second part.
To beat alcohol you must be committed 100% in your mind to never touching another drop.
Some do not have any reason to stop, so I hope your brother-in-law can have a look around him and see many reasons why the decision to abstain is a good idea. Whether he will admit it or not alcohol has become his best friend and he must leave his best friend and never look at him or speak to him again.
There is no point in going on a diet and then spending your time hanging around a cake shop. That’s another reason why a detox can be a good idea. At this time there are groups online who may try to help you with living without alcohol. I tried them all.
AA, counselling, even relaxation classes. It was not for me so I just did what I should have done in the first place and went back to my church where there was people to give support without judging and I felt comfortable talking about my illness. So that’s the highlights run through of a normal withdrawal.
Know the scary part.
If he continues and goes to full decomposition then he is in deep trouble. Death is a real prospect, and even though he may survive like I did the affects of coming off alcohol then can take its toll on the strongest of men/women. He needs to know that that is a real possibility. You can always PM me if he is willing to talk to someone and I will try my best to help him, I am sure many others on here will also be available to help. There is a great deal of support in this little group, he will never need to feel he is odd or somehow different from anyone else. Nearly everyone here has been through that and so asking for understanding is never a problem in the slightest. I truly hope he makes his mind over and had a real go at getting a better life for himself and for those who love him and I hope you see the rewards for being and obviously very good brother in law.
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