About being brave

[Isabelle2]

Hi guys

Hope everyone is ok and enjoying this late summer, although make the most because I fear it might rain in the next week or so. It will be a godsend to the garden though.

My post is as a result of Wass71’s reply after her very disappointing false alarm the other day. She said although others felt she had been brave that she didn’t feel it. She felt a friend who had gone through terrible problems to have a child was brave, but not her.

My kids say I am brave. I had a transplant and have one or two ongoing health problems but I don’t feel brave. I feel normal, and sometimes afraid, but with an extra nuisance which I have to deal with.

I work at a food bank twice a week. Now there I see people who are brave. A lovely lady called Marie (about 60 but looks much older) who sleeps in a stairwell and who needs to move out during the day otherwise she gets nasty comments from the kids on the estate. Elena, who is a refugee, with a 5 yr old, from one of the disputed areas of the Congo, who has been given a room by the Red Cross but who keeps having to move because they cannot promise her a stable address. This means she keeps having to change the food bank she uses and all the social services. She also has to try to get her kid to the same school every day despite the distance.

I think we all know someone who is brave, a widower who has lost their partner of 50 yrs, a kid who is undergoing cancer treatment, a friend who was abused in the past or whatever ... the list goes on.

However, yes we are brave. As brave as the bravest you can think of. Ok you might not feel it but, others see it - and that’s the important thing. They are impressed by our ethic of ‘Keeping on Keeping on’ . We know that it is just the survival gene working but they don’t know that. So let’s graciously embrace it when someone says we are brave. As the ad says ‘ We are worth it!’

Keep on keeping on!

Isabelle xx

[Popel]

Hi there Isabelle hope you well. but where are you from as I’m wondering which part of the uk your experiencing this late summer as there is no late summer as of yet in North Wales it’s been ok but nothing great also you can tell by the colder nights that winter is on its way😂 wish you well and enjoy your good weather lol.paul

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Popel]

Hi popel

Isabelle lives in France.

Miles

[Isabelle2 in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Yes but apparently the weather in Somerset isn’t too bad. Been checking on iPhone weather ap. Xx

[Owlie in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Miles...you changed your name like Trish! I can’t keep up!! 🤪

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

Variety is the spice of life - or so they say 😁

[Owlie in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Oh my days, as my kids would say! All I can think about is turmeric now!

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

What you want to change your name to turmeric?

.

.

..

😁

[Owlie in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Now there’s a thought! Turnip007!

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

Go for it Owlie 😁👍

[Owlie in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Stupid iPad automatic word thing....I meant turmeric!

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

As they say “I believe you - thousands wouldn’t “. 😁😁

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

“Oh my days” gosh not heard that for a few years! 😁👍. It was a saying in some children’s programme wasn’t it. 😁😁.

Milo

[Owlie in reply to ThreeSmiles]

In my proper grown up life I am a teacher and my kids used to say it all the time. I do wonder if the Tweenies introduced it but not sure. 🤨

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

You mean I’ve been conned I thought THIS was the proper grown up life.....☹️

[Owlie in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Miss is very serious and strict in proper grown up life at work!

[ThreeSmiles in reply to Owlie]

I know - I’be been married to a miss for 43 years lol.....😀

[Popel in reply to ThreeSmiles]

Lucky Isabelle then.

[guess1001]

Hi Isabelle, thanks for sharing, yups, am enjoying the mini heatwave. J x

[Wass71]

Dearest Isabelle,

That is such a wonderful post. You are so right, there are so many people coping with the challenges of life, and we all deserve to recognise our resilience, and strengthen.

I know I can't affect the process that is going on around me, so I do just keep on keeping on, as you say.

Thank you for giving us pause for thought.

XWassX

Ps yes it's a beautiful day here in Somerset, warm sunshine and clear sky all day. Its likely to be cold tonight.

[Hidden]

I love your post and Wass's response. And I love how Owlie and Threesmiles responded. It shows how differently we can talk about stuff. It doesn't matter if it is in philosophical terms or followed up with talk of turnips because we know here what matters - that we share all the important values and stand by them and each other.

[Kristian]

Good post Isabelle.

I must admit I was in the same camp. I too never felt brave. To me bravery comes when you have a choice. A choice when you do something that is hard or could have a bad outcome or at least a worse outcome than sticking with the status quo. Speaking out, voicing concern, stepping out from the norm. All those things I think make you brave.

I never really felt brave because all my decisions during my illness and in the run up to transplant were easy. The outcome was always better than the alternative. So, always no-brainers, lol.

Now, of course going through illness and transplant takes guts and resilience to keep going and keep fighting. Not sure what the right word is to describe that though.

Many thanks for the post Isabelle 😊

[Hidden in reply to Kristian]

In my experience the right word is bravery. Sometimes we are called on to keep digging for more when we can hardly believe we can dig any deeper. Then when we do people say "you are very brave" like we are somehow magically endowed with the ability to keep on keeping on. But there is no magic. It is hard work. Like you say, always better than the alternative but still it takes courage, bravery, to dig deep because of the fear that hovers that there may be no deeper to go. That's the choice.