How much longer?: I have never been... - British Liver Trust

British Liver Trust

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How much longer?

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I have never been pushed to the limit as I have with this f#$@@n disease. As stated in my posts my husband was diagnosed 2 yrs ago with stage 4 liver disease and Hep C. He's quit drinking i'm sure. Rumor has he's smelt like booze on maybe -2 occasions. I myself have never smelt it on him. He's had his share of hospital visits, infections, ascites and the last one 3weeks ago he took a good kick to the kidneys. Escaped death literally at least 2-3x. Well he was let out of the hospital last Fri only to go back in yesterday. When he was let go last Fri his state seemed to decline, didn't take meds as required, sleeping most of the time, hallucinating, loss of interest in his favorite tv shows, bed stricken, falls, spits up the occasional bright red spit, no eating, barely drinking anything only some freezies and slurpees. Yesterday EMS came, he was locked in the bathroom with all the symptoms. We were able to get the window open so I crawled in. He was sitting right by the latch and couldn't even comprehend "unlatch the door". So they took him to the hospital ONCE AGAIN..I thought for sure this was his time to go ..today I spoke to him sounded like he was halfway back to the land of the living. What A DIFFERENCE from yesterday! I truly am speechless. How much longer does he suffer? As soon as he gets home his need to take meds is gone and i'm tired of pleading with him. He knows how to pick up MJ and smoke but won't do that with other meds. He is tired of being sick, wants to give up most of the time as I do. Family yes but do you think anyone would come and give me a break. On top of it I'm struggling to leave pain meds alone. Was put on them from a surgery. Now the only way I can clear this up is if I go to treatment, tried to quit but couldn't do it.Or unless God gives me deliverance and I know its possible..so I sit here and wait my turn to take care of myself. And I sit here and wait for a phone call from the doctor to tell me what they're going to do. I wish I could commit him for a while? I also work, take care of our home... Has anyone been in a situation where their spouse no longer drank and struggled with stage 4 liver disease and Hep C and had just as many hospital visits and the start of kidney problems. Once they (kidneys) start is it a problem always? Trying to understand the disease as much as possible but no story is ever the same...I do take comfort in the posts and happy i'm not alone fighting this. I have the occasional beer but when i see the damage it can do it really scares me...

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Can I suggest you contact these family members and let them know that unless they come and help, you are going to have a breakdown ? It is too much for you to cope with on your own and will be of no support at all for your husband if no one gives you the break you so desperately need and deserve.

Can I ask where you live ?

I really do feel for you. It really is exhausting and the fact that you are now thinking you want to drink too to help you cope with all this stress is dangerous and I urge you not to go down that route.

After my husband died, people at the funeral were saying to me '....... if there's anything I can do .....'

Where we're they before he died?

I worked out they didn't mean it anyway but it made them feel better for having said it.

What I'm saying is, these family members will probably say the same to you if and when you are in that situation this is why I think you should get them involved now while you really need it.

Stay strong. Keep me posted. Don't be affraid to ask for help.. there's no shame in it.

Best of luck xx

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Ps. See your GP let them know you are struggling they may well suggest a longer spell in hospital for him so you can get a break. They did with my husband and they detoxed him

xx

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Thanks Laura, I in Sask, Canada and live about 25 min from the town hospital. What burns me out too is I go to the hospital just about evryday. I feel guilty if i don't as he tells me "no one cares"

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Did you go to the hospital EVERYDAY?

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No. It was impossible with working and looking after 2 kids which he had to understand.

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It seems to me he's the 1 who doesn't care, not about himself or you. He will be getting plenty of care from the hospital staff and with other family members on board to relieve you and visit him, it may just lift his spirits seeing different faces to talk to and something new to talk about.

I know how wearing and mundane it can all become. Look after YOU now and give yourself some space to remember who you are.

xx

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