Help - what do I do (life after transplant)

[Kimlescam]

My husband had his transplant at the end of 2017. It felt like the answer to our prayers but is rapidly turning into a nightmare. He hates me for suggesting he had a transplant and got so serious he actually attacked me yesterday, almost throwing me out of our house. We have been married for 30 years, known each other since infant school and have a 16 year old son.

He is diabetic and this has been completely out of control since the transplant and I am currently injecting him 5 times a day which he hates. He was only on tablet before his op.

A small area of his scar has not closed, he has a very large blister on top of hit foot, cold sores and seems to be in constant pain. He has also recently had flu and to date has had 9 lots of antibiotics.

He is depressed and cross with everyone. 2 days after he came out of hospital my Dad (89) had a heart attack and pneumonia and was on the floor for 48 hours before being found.

My husband is so annoyed at the amount of time I have to spend with my Dad and gets cross with both me and our son.

I am at my wits end and feel I cannot cope with his resentment and anger any more. He is bored and hates staying at home all day whilst I also work full time. He is still not advised to drive so must feel like a prisoner but to take it out on my son and I seems unfair.

Any suggestions?

[Bewater]

This must be horrific! Here you are, trying to take care of two adults you love as well as your 16 year old Son, AND yourself! How hurtful!

Clinically, the combination of Influenza, cold sores, and irrational behavior throws a red flag up to something going on neurologicaly.

Add to that possible Infection, inability to filter ammonia out of the blood stream, severe swings in blood sugar, and physical manifestation of his anger....He needs to be seen. Especially if you’ve never seen this behavior from him before.

DISCLAIMER: Not a Doctor. Only a U.S. Paramedic trained very well on patient assessment. Oh, and I’ve been living with Alcoholic Liver Disease and Cirrhosis since June 16 of 2014. Fully compensated liver as of October 13 2017 after a brutal battle with no liver transplant.

Assume I am wrong until you research my opinion please.

[pb9902]

Have you considered the diabetic pump? It regulates far tighter than the insulin pens and has transformed the health of my wife and in particular the constant nature of her mood.

[Hidden]

Wow Kim that sounds awful! Have you seen the GP about this? I wouldn't bother asking at the liver clinic as unless there is a liver issue or something that will affect it, they will probably just nod. That's from my experience but it wouldn't hurt asking I guess.

Something's not quite right here. I was out and about 3 weeks after transplant and driving after 6 weeks.

Hope you can work things out soon.

Klodian

[pear-shaped]

Dear Kim,

I am so sorry to hear your going through all of this...

My husband has had a number of major ops including 2 liver transplants... His moods do change regularly and he becomes needy very often. I am so drained out all the time...

Your husband's behaviour does not sound right - I would call the liver coordinator and tell them what has been happening - with his diabetes being so high I do think that this is more medically linked than him just being mean. If you don't get anywhere with the coordinator then call the medical secretary and ask that he is seen in clinic urgently. They can measure levels and work out what is making him behave this way.

All the best hun.

Yours truly,

Pear

[LAJ123]

pear-shaped and others is/are absolutely right.

As the transplant was fairly recent, the transplant clinics are still going to be quite frequent, so you should very soon have the opportunity to discuss the situation.

What you describe is quite worrying and does need sorting urgently.

Call the transplant coordinators as soon as you can and be completely honest about what is happening.

Jim

[Marydel63]

Hi I would put a call into his transplant team. The diabetes can cause the symptoms and irritability especially if his sugars are high. I am on an insulin pump and I love it . His behavior could be related to all his meds etc call the team asap hang in there

[Liver3]

Scary, did he really not want the transplant??? Absolutely talk to doctors, get help. Diabetics being out of control do doctors say it's due to the liver transplant? So it's been what 3 months and counting. What's your husband's age? Could it be dementia? Get to the right doctors. I worry for you! Keep us posted as hopfully gets better! Prayers for and your son! I myself living chirrois transplant in the future, not sure I want to live that life!

[AyrshireK]

I take it hubby is still on high dose steroids with his transplant being so recent. Steroids are known to cause mood issues, depression and anger. Plus as Jo-Jo and others have pointed out on her thread it is very, very common to go on a roller coaster of emotions after what is a massive operation. The transplant team should be contacted about this and I am sure your hubbies team will have a support system you can turn to. I know at Edinburgh they have a support network including social workers, psychologists and the t/p co-ordinators who should support you with these post transplant mental health issues - we were able to request to see these people at clinic appointments and they made sure they were accessible. (This was when hubby was listed but their literature says they are available post op too).

Definitely discuss this with the team, it is probably a combination of factors that he's going through but it needs sorting as he can't have his life saved only to destroy the quality of life of those loved ones who've supported him all the way.

Big hugs and best wishes,

Katie x