British Lung Foundation
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Will I get away with it?

Will I get away with it?

My true love (who is away until Tuesday) likes his 15 year old malt whisky. What he does not like is me drinking it diluted with coke.

Finding that I did not have any of my blended whisky for a nightcap I opened one of his malt whisky bottles. I did think before opening it that "this is not a good move".

Anyway, I threw caution to the wind and had a couple of measures (doubles) with my coca cola.

I have a grocery delivery arriving tomorrow (Monday) and in that delivery is a bottle of Tescos blended whisky. (I refuse to pay £65!!!! for a bottle.)

My intention is to fill the malt whisky bottle with the blended whisky. Do you think he will notice and, more importantly, will I get away with it? Should I leave home?

Your advice will be much appreciated.



PS - the bottle in my picture sold for £100,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bargain!!!

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48 Replies

you are naughty but i like you.No dont think you will if he pays £65 for his whiskey he will know ,but will be interesting if he doesnt !!1

I'm quite a practised liar. If he asks "Is that a new dress/pair of trousers/coat" I say "No, I've had it for ages".

Before you have a go at me, it was his Mother (lovely lady) who advised me about new things.

I hope he doesn't notice!!!!



Oh yes he will if he is an expert (can't spell that other word con........ :D ) My daughter did the same but with Brandy and as soon as her OH lifted it to sniff he knew - men and their drinks. Think you would be much safer to confess mind you it would be better if you were at a safe distance like you on the moon when you let him know or maybe text him while he is still away so he will be calmer when he gets home :D

No way Jan!!! If I confess he will sulk - I cannot bear it when he sulks.

Perhaps I should arrange to visit my brother in Linlithgow.

I could just hide the bottle and pretend I have no idea where it went. Alternatively, I could pour the rest of the whisky down the sink and put the bottle out for recycling on Tuesday morning (Peter won't be home until early evening).

He can't kill me!!!

Love and hugs



See even JD agrees we are very touch when it comes to our preferred tipple, we know when it's been tampered with. Better not to top it up, if he's a gent as you say he won't mind you having a couple of snifters. :)


I'd emigrate, you've committed sacrilege. Coke in a malt and a good one at that, if that's not bad enough, your gonna dilute it with a cheap nasty blended, that's a hanging offence. He probably wouldn't mind you having some and he will know, its the rest, think you need a ticket to the moon. Naughty Pepsi. :O


It's a bottle of whisky!!!!! I agree that diluting it with coca cola is not quite the thing to do but I'm sure that it won't have a great effect on the world.

I suppose I could say that I drank it for medicinal purposes. Anything is worth a try.

Hugs from



I agree with jandan, confess it is better than ruining a whole bottle he will really get mad then. Text is a brilliant idea.

polly xx.

Oh no Polly

I'm not sure that he knows about whisky. I think that he will just accept what comes out of the bottle.

Peter sulking is not nice.

I'll think of something (I hope).

Love from



How much do you really love your partner....

No I wouldn't dilute a good 15 year old malt whiskey with a tesco blended one.

Sow as you would expect to reap would be my advice.

Divorce would be a good option for your partner should you adulterate his whiskey.

Hi Dito

I've been married to my true love for 45 years at Christmas.

Divorce!!!! No way. I've put up with him for 45 years (and he with me I suppose) so there is no way I'm going to divorce him.

Do you think he might believe that I was sleep-walking when I used his posh whisky. I'm sure if he loved it that much then he would drink it more often. He hardly every drinks.

Lots of love



Find somewhere to hide for an hour or two and hope for the best,good luck !


I thought I had cracked it - but I haven't.

Looked at the list of malt whisky on Tescos Online. They don't sell the damned stuff.

I was going to buy a half bottle of the malt and fill up Peter's bottle. I think I've must been shot down in flames.

It looks as though I'm going to have to lie so that I can avoid the sulks. I do feel bad though because he will wonder if he is having problems with his memory (poor wee lamb).

Oh dear.



I have made investigations and the consensus is you have two days to finish the bottle off then to dispose of the evidence and should the absence of said bottle be mentioned the reply to be "Oh you finished that ages ago don't you remember" Thereby making him believe he is the one who has the memory problems not you who has them really because you are the one who forgot to buy your own!! :D

I think I love you Jandan.



Me, too!

Jandan's solution is definitely the way to go!!

And have a wee dram for me while you're at it! :D


Oh my oh my oh my - whatever you do don't put the blended anywhere near the malt !!!!

Better to lose the measures you took, ( all property is shared ) than to ruin the whole bottle.

Anyway darling, you say, I needed to console myself in your absence.

You let him have some of your gravy on his roasties I imagine.

Brazen it out - ask him not to sulk over your weakness but to save it for his own.

Pack your bags.

I think that about covers it,



If I called my husband 'Darling' he would know that something was wrong.

I think I'll just get my coat (lol).



After 45 years ! Oh say it ain't so.

Just fess up Annec with a smile jeez it's only a malt.


Get one on the never/never.!!!


If he found out that I had bought whisky on the 'never never' he would not forgive me.

I took out loans to help my boy through university and when my true love found out he was hellish. He asked me why we didn't ask him for the money needed. Doh!!!!

Depending on how I feel when he comes home I will either tell him the truth or lie (lying seems preferable).

Hope things are not too bad with you sweetie.

Lots of love



Just tell him you were missing him so much,& very upset,so had to have a tipple to calm down.Appeal to his vanity!! xx


Are you mad!!!! He will not believe that I missed him so much that I had to have a tipple.



My late dearest once tried it with a bottle of Barburcourts 15yr old 101 reserved, she topped it up with lambs navy, then blamed the kids, didn't work the kids hate the stuff, i would not have minded, it was the lies and deceit, and ruination of a fine drink that got me. The clothes bit didn't work either she always put them on my card :)

Does he like a good cigar ?

Hi Azaard

He (Peter) has had one cigarette in his life (in 1970 when we were at a party - he was talking to a clothes post at the time!!!!!).

His father used to have a cigar at Christmas - just the one.

No, apart from the one cigarette in 1970 Peter has never smoked (which is good).

Love from



It was just though, a good cigar and a large glass of his malt waiting, as a welcome home might have swung it for you, you could have said you got abit carried away pouring it in anticipation of his return.

Oh no.

I have always been independant (should that be independent) - well, until I retired. Peter is the one who is good with money - unfortunately I am not. If I have money then I send it or give it away.

I'm sure that it will all come out in the wash.



I think they call that money laundering Annec! lol

That calls for a spell in prison, hahaha (only joking)

Just don't dilute will ruin it.

Good luck hun,

Lorraine :)


Think it got tangled in the rinse :)

Tell the truth and shame the devil. And if he does try to go into a sulk, turn the tables on him - oh, so you'd deprive me of a nightcap - routine.

I never realised I had such a good marriage - I never needed to lie about anything. He quietly accepted everything I did, everything I bought, and always with the words, "if that makes you happy, then I'm happy" ....

Can I borrow him?



I'd love to say yes, but sadly he died 5 years ago.... :(

It's only now, I realise just what a treasure he was.... and yes, I do miss him ...

I'm sorry.



'Sokay x x x

I ran out so I had some of yours...

I opened it by mistake...

I thought it was past it's use-by date...

But, whatever you do, don't pour anything into the bottle. :O


Tell the truth and throw yourself on the mercy of the court. Failing that come and live with me. lol Bobby xx

Fill it up with Tescos own, my nearest and dearest shouts at me for putting lemonade with my Bells, can't imagine what he'd say if I put coke with malt. Fill it up watch him drink it, hopefully he won't notice otherwise yo're going to have to go and live with Bobby.

Wishing all the best, take care of yourself and try not to worry.

Lib x

Tell him to pick up another bottle of his favorite whisky on his way home because you've aquired a taste for his superier brand and have finished off the tiny bit he had left! be brave!!!! and good luck! :D

Whatever you choose to do Pepsi, I hope all works out in the end .......... ;)

Keep on keeping on ...


Try 'Selective Memory'

Don't you have joint finances? Surely then, everything is shared between you so it doesn't matter a jot whose whisky it is or how much it cost. Anyway, if he is your true love, he'd give you his last Cadbury button, and his last drop of posh stuff. However, as a whisky aficionado I can confirm that diluting it with coca-cola really is unforgiveable ;) so don't 'fess up to that whatever you do

ff x

Hi ff

We have separate current accounts but everything else is joint.

I'm sure that Peter would give me his last Cadbury button and he wouldn't mind letting me have his whisky - it's just that he hates that I put coca cola in it (and he knows I can't drink it neat).



Yeah, to a whisky lover that's real sacrilege. My favourite is Knockando but I eke it out, one bottle lasts me about 6 months!

ff x

Hi Annec you have been a naughty girl haven't you? Ha ha. I've got another idea. Fill it up with water and blame Tesco! You can have a good laugh when he has a go at them and calls the Office of Fair Trading.... :)

Bev xx

Hi Bev

I've ordered some from Amazon.

I have also decided that I won't touch his whisky in future.



Many moons ago we took over the running of a pub, the first words a regular customer said to us were "don't bother trying to palm me off with cheap scotch, I always drink Teachers and I can tell". Well for 18 months he drank supermarket own (as was the practice in those days) and he always said how nice it was.

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