Bypass next week : Hubby had failed... - British Heart Fou...

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Bypass next week


Hubby had failed stent procedure now going for a bypass next week, I am terrified can anyone advise thanks

53 Replies

Hi tessadog

Had Aortic valve replaced and bypass nearly 4 years ago, having open heart surgery is major but the thoughts in your head are much worse than the reality. You are pain free after they make sure of that, and doing all the things you are told to will help your recovery.

You will have been given information on what to do when you get home, but if have any questions or you need information just post and someone will be along to help.

Try not to worry he will need you to be strong and listen if he wants to talk.

Remember it’s baby steps to start with.

Sending you best wishes Pauline

tessadog in reply to 080311

Thanks Pauline that's the trouble it's the thoughts in my head that are causing me the stress!! thank you for replying will try not to think too much just be glad when it's done X

080311 in reply to tessadog

Remember the medical team do this daily to us it’s something so alien but something so straight forward to them. Believe me he will be fine, and back feeling good again. X

tessadog in reply to 080311

Thanks so much spending time thinking too much X

I am at home recovering from a quadruple heart bypass, they have this surgery down to a fine art please don’t worry. Allan

Thanks so much hope your recovery goes well X

Had 3 stent operations which didn't go well over 18 months then had a single bypass to correct this. No point kidding that it is simple surgery as it isn't and he will have a lot of pain relief and it will take months before he starts to get more mobile and pain free. As said earlier, an everyday op for the surgeon but it is a major event for his body so he will need a lot of support and reassurance that the end game is worth it and to realise that the recovery will take time and patience. I got very down and frustrated as I couldn't get a comfortable sleep position and slept (badly) in a chair for 6 weeks as in a bed was too uncomfortable. If this is an issue after the surgery there are various methods/aids to help from orthopaedic cushions to frames to elevate the pillow and sleeping position. Patience and reassurance goes a long way. Good luck

tessadog in reply to MartinOG

Thanks for the reply, will be aware X

Hey there

I just had my bypass 4 weeks ago. Frankly, leave it to the experts and ur in good hands.

Rest assured that ur hubby is on his road to a better health. The pain is manageable, he will be a sleeping beauty for the first day. 2nd day will be more alert. And transfer to normal ward from ICU.

Loss of appetite, maybe constiparion , goggly due to the pain killers etc. But trust me, things get better each day. Its baby steps, but steadily u get stronger and appetite improves.

Personally, pre ops is all about anxiety, post ops is a long route to recovery. Stay positive ! It does helps!

tessadog in reply to St03

Thanks for the reply good to know what others have gone through, all the best X

I can understand how you might be feeling. My husband had bypass surgery last year and it was a scary time. It will pass, though, and you will both get through it. Have faith in the hospital staff. They know what they are doing.

I have to say that it was the student nurses who gave me most support and information. They helped me to understand that the things I saw on and in my husband were all perfectly normal and part of the process, even though I found it all very frightening.

This group gave me some really good practical advice for when he came home, so do look on the old posts.

And go really gently on yourself. You matter too, and you should just do what you can cope with and accept help and friendly support where it is helpful. This is something you are both going through together. I will be thinking of you. Do come back here if you need to unload or ask any more questions.

tessadog in reply to Chaika

Thanks so much really appreciate your reply X

Chaika in reply to tessadog

I’m not sure there’s much I can do to help, but I’m here if I can

I won’t lie, when my husband had his done I didn’t sleep a wink for about a week. All I will say is I had 100% confidence in the medical staff and you get through it step by step. We missed out on the cardiac rehab but I presume you will have that. Considering the magnitude of the operation recovery is quite quick. Good luck in all this

Thanks so much X

I had a quintuple bypass last year, it was quite a surprise and neither myself or my wife had time to think about it beforehand.

As has been said earlier, it is routine for the surgical teams that perform the op. And while recovery may be quite hard it is worth it. I felt so much better afterwards. Just make sure to follow all the instructions. I don't know where you are but in Southampton the after care team are superb. Any worries at all and you can phone them.

Well said Bro!

tessadog in reply to Giant68

Thanks for the reply he his having it done at Leeds.

Both of you keep positive! As others have said, this type of surgery is now a fine art. The team will be doing operations several times a week and will have great expertise. I had a triple bypass two years ago at Papworth and can honestly say that the experience was nowhere near as bad as I had expected it to be.

My best wishes for the future, for both of you.

Hi there. I just wanted to wish you and your husband all the best. Tough going on you both. Roller coaster of emotions and anxieties. I found this site brillant for making you feel you are not alone in this new world you find yourselves in. My husband went through tests last year having found a 50 percent blockage and it turns your life upside down. But time helps and thinking positive. You look after yourself too as someone else already mentioned. Finding yourself having to be the strong one in the relationship for you both was new territory for me and do lean on family and friends for emotional support. I walked lots and lots (and cried as I went!) whatever helps. The best of luck to you both. Take care xx

tessadog in reply to Mabster4

Thanks so much for the reply really helps. X

Hi. I had a triple bypass last October following a heart attack that came completely out of the blue. Yes it was a scary time but the team that looked after me were fantastic every step of the way and there was very clear guidance given for what to do post op. I strongly recommend following this advice which includes what to do when your husband comes home and info about the cardiac rehabilitation programme. Nine months on and following some dietary and lifestyle changes I am doing really well and have even taken up running! Wishing your husband all the very best. I'm sure he is in very good hands and will get through this. Please let us know how things go and take care of yourself too.

tessadog in reply to Rayros21

Thanks so much due to have it done Wed 8th X

Rayros21 in reply to tessadog

Will hope and pray that all goes well. I'm sure it will. Wishing you both all the best.

tessadog in reply to Rayros21

Thanks so much X

Nothing to worry about. On 3rd August 2018 I had a triple bypass at the age of 55.

Six weeks later I was back at work.

The NHS will look after him.

Thanks for the reply really helps X

I had a double bypass in Feb, I'm 46 with a young family and was terrified at the time as to what could happen to my family and me. As everyone has said though, the doctors, nurses, porters etc are all amazing professionals. While it's a major op and a long recovery period they will take exceptional care of you and give a lot of advice and guidence. At five months post-op I feel a new man, nothing like how unwell I felt prior to my op.

Best of luck to both of you. x

tessadog in reply to Judge_Dredd

Thanks for the reply X

Try not to worry, he'll be fine. This such a run-of-the-mill operation nowadays. I had a quadruple heart bypass 2 years ago and my recovery has been fantastic. It will be uncomfortable for the first couple of months whilst his sternham heals but if he takes it easy and follows advice he will be his old self, or even better before you know it.

tessadog in reply to Berniel69

Thanks for the reply X

Hi..I had my bypass on Christmas eve..

It seems like the operation was in many ways worse for my partner she has since told me she was unable to do anything until she was told i was ok, so you're not alone in your worry..but from my point of view I was nervous about the operation but as the surgeon told me its major surgery but not particularly difficult nowadays... I wish you all the best..and try not to worry he's in good hands..

tessadog in reply to Dj1962

Thanks for the reply really helps X

Hi Tessadog,

Of course you are frightened, that's perfectly normal and understandable.

My name is Alec and I'm one of life's scaredy cats. I don't like going into aeroplanes, big dogs, snakes or going up ladders. They told me at my local hospital that I had gone past what they could do for me (stents I think) so I was blue lighted all the way to St.Thomas' in London for a triple bypass.

The day before the operation I couldn't understand why I was so calm. I thought I'd be climbing the walls! It occurred to me that I realised there was no alternative. Doing nothing wasn't an option, so I put my trust in the health care professionals. They all did an amazing job.

Your hubby will recognise you are in turmoil at the moment. Once he starts his recovery though he will need you every inch of the way. Be brave for him. Good luck to you both and please let us all know how he progresses post op.


tessadog in reply to invictaAlec

Will do and thanks for taking the time to reply X

Hi tessadog.

I think I know what your'e going through. I was one of life's worriers and believe it or not, lost a stone that GP's put down to stress (sadly put it all back on!!).

All I can say is that when my hubby was told he needed a quad bypass, he was mortified and so was I. The first thing I did when we got home from hospital was sign up to this forum and like you, I made loads of friends by asking so many questions.

I was told there's no such thing as a stupid question. These knowledgable lovelies on this site will guide you through practically everything.

My hubby had his op in November 2018. Op was on the Monday and he was back home on the Friday.

He was only given paracetamol for pain (following the massive reaction he had to opiates - foxes (sitting on his bed chatting to him) and various insects (climbing up the walls and waving at him!). Once that episode was over, I got him a sports pack for his hospital TV and as the food was not to his taste!! - got him sandwiches and pasta pots from the onsite M &S.

As everyone is saying, the surgeons operating do this every day so everything will really be fine.

What I will say is make sure you look after yourself. It's easy to dwell on your husband and not yourself.

On release he'll be given advice and guidance so you will both be aware of what's going on.

The main thing is breathing exercises. These will help the lungs recover from the op.

Take good care of yourselves and keep us posted xxxx

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply just makes it harder as he in hospital now until he gets it done and with the covid no visitors allowed!!! but everyone's comments really do help X

Try not to worry. Although this is a major operation to us, this is a routine surgery for the consultant and their team. Make sure you look after yourself and be open with family and friends about how you are feeling. Remember although you are not being operated on, you are living through it with your loved one, everything is out of your control. Just make sure you are there for him and make sure he does exactly what they say during his recovery as this will help him get over the op quicker.

Remember to take time out and be open with him about how you feel as bottling up feelings, especially after the operation can cause confusion and resentment between the two of you.

Take care of him and yourself.

tessadog in reply to Chilco

Thanks so much for the reply means a lot X

Chilco in reply to tessadog

You are welcome. Be reassured he is in capable hands. Take care.

My fiancé had a triple bypass in late January 2020 (he had unsuccessful stents in September 2019)

We were both terrified before he went to theatre (though after they gave him the premed drugs he thought he was one of the X-men and was quite happy!)

I saw him as soon as he was back in icu (he was still intubated) and although it was daunting to see him having a machine breath for him and him be unconscious, he looked really well and a better colour then I’d seen him in months.

The next morning (less then 24 hours after surgery) he was sitting up, out of bed in a chair and eating his breakfast and had walked a few steps. He was very sleepy and confused but doing so much better then I’d imagined at that stage.

He stayed in intensive care Mon-Weds and was moved to a ward on the Weds evening, then came home on the Saturday.

He was very grumpy at times understandably as has been through a lot (both in hospital and at home) and had a few moments of being very nasty to me (everything was my fault for a few days) which is very out of character - but I just kind of ignored this! So I would say be prepared for the possibility of this.

If you want to ask anything specific please feel free and keep us all updated 🙂 take care of yourself.

tessadog in reply to Chickenlou

Thanks for your explicit account really helps to hear people's accounts of bypasses thanks to all you lovely people feeling more relaxed about it!! Thanks so much for the reply X


I was rushed into A&E 14 months ago where it was discovered I’d had a heart attack due to coronary artery problems caused by a genetic disorder I had no idea I had. After tests, an angiogram which showed blocked arteries, (two of which were over 90% blocked)I was told I needed emergency bypass surgery and actually had to wait for 2 and a half weeks in hospital before the procedure as to go home until my surgery could prove dangerous. I was in a state of shock and anxiety and petrified I wouldn’t make the op as my diagnosis made us realise the condition was responsible for my mum’s heart bypass in 1990 and that my brother who had actually died whilst waiting for an angiogram two years earlier must have had the same condition as we have since found his daughter also has it.

I ended up having a triple bypass which saved my life as I was told I had less than two years if I didn’t. The hospital, staff and surgeons were amazing and talked through everything with me and were tolerant of my anxiety & fear.

After my op my husband informed me I was hooked up to machines for a day or so and then went to ICU where I had one to one nurse care for a few days. She was great, caring and honest and wouldn’t let me just feel sorry for myself (which is exactly what I needed at that time). After ICU I went to a cardiac ward where I spent a week recovering and getting on my feet before returning home to recover more fully. It took time and care and everyone was amazing.

Your fear and nervousness is normal but I believe your hubby is in the best hands possible even though it takes time to get over. Please let us know how he goes on and take great care of yourself too as you will be an essential asset to aid him in his recovery.

tessadog in reply to Trog1

Thanks so much for the reply my husband has been in hospital since Monday due to be transferred to Leeds hospital today then bypass on Wednesday, glad you got sorted and best wishes for the future X

Trog1 in reply to tessadog

All the very best for Wednesday. My thoughts are with you. Take care and stay safe xx

tessadog in reply to Trog1

Thanks he still waiting to be transferred to another hospital so hope it happens tomorrow ready for Wednesday, really appreciate your good wishes, take care X


Get a V shaped pillow to help him sleep for the first fortnight back and make a bed up for yourself if you can. It takes 6-8 weeks for the breast bone to knit together so only very gentle exercise up to that point. Nothing above shoulder level, front opening shirts etc

They will have him walking before he leaves and he will be able to slowly extend his distance travelled when he comes home. At first it will be measured in yards, then tens of yards, then light posts, round the block , etc.

'Why me' reactions are very common but he will improve as he starts to move, but nice and easy does it. His stamina will be almost non existent at first and feeling totally shattered at times is quite normal. He will probably have lost a bit of weight so nutritious meals will be in order = plenty of protein .

After the the first month he should be sleeping a lot better and moving around a bit more easily. After about 8 weeks you should hear something about rehab and begin the steady march back to fitness. There is a strong link between completing these exercises and good outcomes.

By the time 3 months arrive he should be about recovered, with full strength gathering pace - but it does take time for the scars to heal and stamna to build before total recovery takes place, and a new, more active life will beckon.

tessadog in reply to Ianc2

Thanks so much for the reply very useful info to know what to expect X


I also failed stent procedure then had double bypass in February. I was scared obviously but I am now five months after surgery back at work then running round after my grandkids and back to being myself. Just go with it. Good luck and hope all goes well for him x I honestly feel great now x

tessadog in reply to Hidden

Thanks for the reply glad you on the road to recovery X

Best of luck to you both. Per other messages, its very tough on the mind to mentally deal with , but you will both get through it and all being well your hubby will be home with you quickly. I had an emergency triple bypass last year. It was a shock as I'm only in my early 40s, but there were alot of positives that came out if it. The support from my wife, family and friends, a new approach to a healthier lifestyle (within reason) I still enjoy an alcoholic drink or 2.. :) I met some great people in hospital recovering and during rehab. I also found the more I read about the op it would increase the anxiety so I stopped and that helped. but like others say, it's a routine.. it's the recovery that is tiring on the body, but when all said and done I feel great today and that is thanks to the amazing medical teams and having the op.

2 tips.. from what I was advised so paying it forward...try to get as much sleep before the op. It will help whilst in ICU. Pending the time of the op, when the ICU team offer you to get out of bed take it. No matter how hard it is its speeds up the recovery and gets you out of ICU!

Take care and wish you both well

tessadog in reply to Wadeowen

Thanks so much glad you now feeling great X

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