My stress

[Lippylou6]

My husband had cardiac arrest 6 months ago died for 41 mins the brilliant nhs saved him he was a heavy smoker I have found out he is smoking again I try to talk to him I get told I don’t understand .i understand I had to watch him while I gave him cpr till ambulance crew got there I under stand I nearly lost my world I’m sorry i think he doesn’t understand how broken I was and stress and now I’m worried every day this will happen again .

[gilreid1]

I was a cigar smoker and stopped just over a year ago. The best thing that helped me was vape I started with a medium strength and reduced to zero nicotine after five months. Not saying that you nag him but try and encourage him to try alternative most of us stubborn males do the opposite the wife tells us.

Good luck

[Lippylou6 in reply to gilreid1]

Thanks I don’t nag him I try to say what I went through

[Lezzers in reply to Lippylou6]

I totally understand how you feel & you have my complete sympathy.

My husband also had a cardiac arrest and myself & a neighbour had to do CPR until the paramedics arrived.

Someone who's never had to witness this will never be able to understand what a very traumatic experience it is & many people suffer PtSD afterwards. Like you I try to explain to my husband how I felt/feel but it's impossible as they usually have no recollection of anything.

There is a support group called sudden Cardiac Arrest UK which I would highly recommend you look up, they also have a very supportive Facebook group. The name says it all really, everyone has either had or witnessed a loved one having a cardiac arrest. It's a friendly, helpful and supportive group of people who understand.

Ps: my husbands cardiac arrest was over 20 years ago, the stress certainly gets easier though I still occasionally check that he's still breathing when he's asleep!

[Lippylou6 in reply to Lezzers]

Nice to hear someone understands me I’ll look into that many thanks I hope I have another 20 years with him thank you

[Lezzers in reply to Lippylou6]

The only other thing I can add is, you matter here as much as your husband does, everything he does affects you and its not easy dealing with your fears.

You may want to consider counselling, it wasn't around when my husband had his CA but had it been I certainly would have gone for it. The group I mentioned earlier will be able to advise more on that issue.

Good luck with your next 20 years.

[gilreid1]

Keep talking for sure. Better together it is not easy I know.

[Prada47]

Hi

Did your Husband do Cardiac Rehab after his Cardiac Arrest, and did they tell him why he had a CA ( what caused it ). I stopped from being a heavy smoker to none after having a Heart attack not CA and it seems easy now but it wasn't.

There are lots of products on the market that will help him stop But only if he wants to !!! you have my sympathy. I never understood my wife when she got on to me for Smoking but I do now.

Stay Alert Stay Well

[Lippylou6 in reply to Prada47]

Thank you hopefully one day he will stop and yes they did tell him

[Bagrat]

I really feel for you. Over the years my husnand "gave up" smoking several times. Some of these episodes he had not given up, just hidden his addiction from me which I found incredibly hurtful.

I tried to explain that it felt he didn't care enough about our life together to try!! I realise now that is not the issue for a smoker. It is an addiction and we must not lose sight of that.

He finally gave up 30 years ago because he was told it might mean he could continue in a job he loved if he did. ( this was not achieved)

He still says if he had one cigarette he'd be back to square one

[gsw5700]

If your husband smokes, he will die early because of this. I was told I'd be dead within a year if I continued to smoke. That was enough for me, I've not smoked since my HA on 5th April. It's not a pleasurable thing to do, it's pure addiction, whilst he is smoking, he is always withdrawing and then craving the next fix.

I was told that if I really couldn't stop, then try vaping with no flavouring, just clear vape liquid (so only a few chemicals) then reduce the amount of nicotine over time. The Allen Carr stop smoking book is meant to be very good. Good Luck

[Ianc2]

The covid 19 virus picks off certain groups of people, smokers being at the top of the list, however as an addict he will probably be resistant to change. Does he have friends who smoke?

[HenryTudor]

Sorry to be blunt, but just tell him he’s a selfish fugger!

[Hidden]

When a friend of mine had a heart attack and 3 stents his wife told me that he was still smoking.So I took him a pack of fags.Told him see how fast you can smoke the lot.He then asked why.I said I've always fancied your wife,so when you die,I'll be in here like a shot spending all your money.He soon gave up.x