never had an orgasm.10 years of sex life.31years old now how does it feel?

[need]

sometimes i feel so embaraced and sad at the same.I have abstained for 6yrs since my divorce because i see no good thing worthty of trying. To me sex is more of satifying my partner than enjoying anything to myself.what do i do? im i just one unlucky type of a woman?I had pain before and i have tried working around that to overcome.no matter what i do im still the same when it comes to sex. Now i have a new partner,he loves me alot and im still worried about this issue.My reactions confuses him.He is ready to take it easy with me.No sex no breast touching because i also feel uncomfortable with my breast since i breastfed before.my self confidence is dropping so bad.Help me i love him and dont want to lose him honestly.

[khandersuk]

Hi Need

If you have access to a women's sexual wellbeing service, that would be the best place to start. This type of service would look at possible physical explanations as well as emotional / psychological for reasons you don't enjoy sex or haven't been able to orgasm. In the larger cities, this may be easier to find than if you are located in less urban areas. You could try going to your GP and asking for a counselling referral, or possibly to a GUM service as they may be able to offer some advice as well.

And to reassure you, there are many females (and males!) who feel uncertain and frustrated about sex, so you are certainly not alone. It could mean putting a bit of effort into finding the help that suits you best, but it is definitely out there.

Best of luck

khandersuk

[need in reply to khandersuk]

thanks alot. wont give up.

[joaparra]

get a competent shrink in your disability, and go to counseling with your man.

[Rastus]

Hi,

Don't give up. It will happen when the time is right.

My wife and I were both virgins when we met and it took several months of pleasurable experimenting before she had her first (of many) orgasms.

Try taking your time and making love in different positions. Also have loads of foreplay before penetration takes place.

Do something different to excite each other. For example, we used a (ribbed) condom for the first time last night, even though we don't need to for contraceptive purposes.

We were both really looking forward to experiencing this new aspect of our love making. My wife orgasmed twice and it was a wonderful and most loving time for both of us time. As we are trying for a baby, I removed the condom before ejaculating inside her as normal.