When is it too old to have a baby?

[Shaze12]

Hi just wondering when is it too old to have a. Baby?When it comes to be there as long as possible?

When did you have your last child?

[SRA8]

It's very variable. I know on both sides of my family women have had children in their forties. Meanwhile others will stop ovulating in their 30s. You could get an AMG test to see what your ovarian reserve is like if you are worried you are running out of time.

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

Thanks for the reply. No I was wondering when is it too late to have children at the same time to be here for your children as long as possible what age would be too old....

[SRA8 in reply to Shaze12]

I could live until I'm 90 but I may die tomorrow. It's a very personal choice. My husband will be 44 when our next child is born. We both have serious -ish health issues but we are happy with our choice. I know a few families who have lost one of the parents in their 30s or 40s due to cancer. Nothing is guaranteed.

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

So true... And congratulations on your pregnancy how many are you blessed with? Sorry to hear about your health issues.

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

How old are you?

[SRA8 in reply to Shaze12]

Thank you. I already have a boy who is 3. I'm 37, 38 by the time the baby arrives. Ideally I'd have 3 children but by the time I'm able to start trying for a third it'll probably be too late for me. Getting pregnant is very difficult for me so ran out of time.

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

What age do u class as too late though? And why? Because u never know what's round the corner...

[SRA8 in reply to Shaze12]

Well it's taken me nearly 3 years to get pregnant each time. So by the time I've delivered, recovered and got pregnant again my husband may be nearly 50 and for us that is too late.

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

Oh ok well that's understandable It gets me so angry when people say oh why have you had them so late.... Not to me personally... but to my friends... But not everyone can get pregnant with a click of a finger....and omg it really gets me... I was trying for 6 years with my second.. and took a year with my third... People sometimes say oh those that have babies in there 40's are self fish! But how?!

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

And then I question my self am I being selfish in wanting a baby in my early 40's.....

[SRA8 in reply to Shaze12]

My mum had my younger sister in her 40s (happy accident). I can't do the maths but my Gran had my aunty at the same time my mum had my older sister. My aunt is 42 and my Gran 89 (likely happy accident). Everyone is very happy. Age is but number. I hope you find peace with a decision and have no regrets.

[Shaze12 in reply to SRA8]

That's so good to know and definitely u have made me feel better with that comment. I wish you well with your pregnancy and labour.

[Jogsandwalks in reply to SRA8]

Hi So sorry to hop onto your conversation Shaze. But what SRA said just said pricked my ears up.

I'm 37 too and currently ttc to get my 2nd so my son can have a sibling. I'm not having much success. My son was conceived the same month I came off contraception. I really thought it'd be just as easy the 2nd time round but no.

My son is 2 years old now so really conscious of the age gap and my age. Do you have any medical problems that made it hard to conceive, I'm only asking because I might need to see a doctor and ask then for tests or something.

What did you do to help you conceive apart from have sex, of course.

Any words of advice would be greatly appreciated.

[SRA8 in reply to Jogsandwalks]

Yes we both have medical conditions. It took a lot of dedication to get pregnant. Reduce toxic load and inflammation etc so changed to cleaner products, stopped using plastic tupperware etc. mainly dairy and gluten free and significantly reduced sugar intake. We had help from a company called the Rosa Institute.

[Jogsandwalks in reply to SRA8]

Thank you so much for your reply. I'll look into the Rosa Institute

[Kaylon]

I had my first baby when I was 39 and my second baby when I was 41 and I would love another but that's in the stars whether that'll happen. We started fertility treatment when I was 35 and it took that long to have both children. The only thing that annoyed me was that the hospitals treated me differently and put pressure on to induce because of my age but other than that I don't feel any different. Xxx

[Shaze12 in reply to Kaylon]

It's horrible how we older mums get treated differently....I get the risks and everything but still they need to be less obvious about it.... Why shouldn't we have our babies.... Because of our ages.... should we give up and live childless it's not out of choice that we decided to have them late it's in god's hands... It really annoys me when people say u had them late it's ok for them who are younger because they had them earlier without struggling... I'm sorry you experienced that my dear. Xx

[Trying1234]

I was 40 when I had my first and 42 when I had my second. It took a long time to have my eldest and I experienced a couple of miscarriages. I wish it didn’t take so long. I think the challenge is more around us not having much of a family support network nearby meaning it’s pretty intense all of the time! I wouldn’t have another now at 43 but that’s mainly because I don’t want any more. I knew I wanted another after my first and didn’t question it.

I feel that if you want to try again you should and it’s not worth thinking about other people’s opinions it is up to you x x

[Shaze12 in reply to Trying1234]

Thanks hun. I'm sorry it took so long for you but you got there in the end... Having to want to have a baby and it taking so long only people like Ur self know how that feels.... I remember crying every single month when I came on... I was allways devastated..

Because I knew I was getting older and will only get harder... But i got there 3 beautiful children 8, 2, 4mths and will for sure push for 1 more. 🙂