She is now back in her home where the staff are being fantastic. But she seems to have gone further downhill due to her awful experience. She is refusing to try to walk and the physiotherapists who will be going to the home are going to have their work cut out.
We can only get her to eat and drink a bit now but the staff really care and are trying their best. They are going to start pureeing her food from tomorrow. She lost her lower denture in the home 3 weeks ago and although they and us have ripped the place apart trying to find it, no success. They said the dentist will try to make her some more but I am not hopeful. She seems to be fading away and seeing her for the first time wearing an adult bib and being spoon fed is horrible. I don't think she will last long....
Its sounds awful but I wish for her sake that she does die soon - she has got very little quality of life left and its just dragging out the inevitable. I can't see her improving any more.
I think we are much kinder to animals than people....
The good news is the operation has been successful, with my feeling they would not have spent money on surgery when a short time later the patient would pass away.
A terrible experience for both of you to see such times, with the help of the caring staff I hope for a happier outcome.
In a good place with caring staff the most that can be is already in progress I wish you both well as nature runs it's course making the decisions we would not dare for fear of error.
What can we say hypercat,,try and remember all the good times you had together,also tell her about all the good times,,,,Think your mum very frightened and must be shattered after her experiance,,,Keep a wee bit of space for yourself in your head,,,or you could make yourself ill and at this sad time ,that would not be very good for anyone..really feel for you xxx
Hi Bev. I am glad to hear your Mom is back in familiar surroundings. I also understand your feelings about her decline, it is quite natural and understandable. When we love people, we don't want to see them suffer at all.
Lynne xx
I feel fairly sure \I know what is going on in your Mum's mind. Once an independent lady, she is making a decision for herself - fed up with it all. It is hard for you, hopercat, mums are so precious. I nursed my mother at the end of her life in hospital. Hard, but good to know I was there for her.
I will be thinking about you, hypercat - all the best from Annie80x
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Thank you very much Annie. I don't think she is making any kind of decision she is too tired and confused to think any more. She seems to be just existing.
It is difficult feeling so helpless as a loved one suffers keep a hold of hope the best thing you can do the doctors must do what they can that will improve quality of life.
The support of carers and yourself improve the quality of life keep the faith.
Bless you Stitch. You said exactly what I needed to hear....hope you are right.
Bev xxxx
Aww thank you all so much. I feel better just reading all your lovely comments. Its great to know that my friends are thinking of her and me. I don't feel so alone. The staff at the home are very positive and say they have got others back from this state before and they think mum will improve. Don't know how much they believe this or whether they are just trying to keep our spirits up...
The home said when she went there that they need to know, as a matter of form, which funeral directors we would be using. We have put this off, but after a discussion with my sister today I am going to check out a couple of local ones. I am dreading it. We would prefer just to go straight to the Co-op like we did with my dad. But because another sister stole all her money we can't afford them. We are not going to allow this sister to have any say in this or any financial matters concerning mum in future which will cause more problems. But hey ho we will face that when we come to it.
Many thanks again for all your kindness.
Bev xxxxxx
Big hugs to you and your Mum, Bev,keep strong xxxx
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