been reading the responses to the latest poll. What has struck me is how many of us discuss our individual problems but go on to say....
'but there are thers much worse than me'
or
'It could be a lot worse'
or
'At least I can still do .....'
We are a pretty remarkable bunch really, or is it all the British sense of stiff upper lip and mustn't grumble. Whatever, I think there a lot of people who could learn a thing or two about living with something day in and day out from the people on here.
Lynne xx
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Lynne1955
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it pays to be positive when things aren't right in your life, and the above remarks are just that. I say this sort of thing about my health. I know I am old, and things could be a lot worse, but can understand some get really depressed, and need to talk. That is where this forum comes so needed.
• in reply to
ust joined and hoping to get a little support from other members and hope maybe help others in return.
I think most of us stay positive most of the time. But when we need a moan there is always someone here to listen and understand. And that is important.
Hi, to add my tuppenceworth I think you are all amazing, offering support, kind words (and the dutch uncle aka a dose of honesty and reality check when needed). I really hope you all feel very proud of yourselves for keeping positive and getting on with life with the cards that have been dealt.
"We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand" (Randy Pausch: The Last Lecture)
and "We are often distracted by what we don’t have which blinds us from what we already have in front of our eyes"
Well done all of you. Keep that positive mental attitude, however don't struggle in silence if you need support ask for it..... use the forum, friends, family, GP etc or call the emotional support servcice at the BLF helpline: magic number 03000 030 555
Take care
Know what you mean about being positive and it can help, having said that it is only natural to have negative days, it's how we are wired. I read a book called "Smile or die" very very interesting and made me feel better about my true feelings. xx
An important element of chronic illness is the attitude we can maintain throughout our difficulties, making light of them and moving on without dwelling on the negatives always there but accounted for before moving onto living the best life we are able.
Wonderful community here I believe you have said all that is necessary Lnne with remarkable bunch really what more is there.
Ahh I've just read a book called The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch, being tearful on the train was not the best of looks but the book is very uplifting and I'd recommend it, it has a very positive message. Any other book recommendations out there?
You are so right Lynne what is the point in moaning and groaning we have something the matter with us and there are a lot worse off. I have a young friend who has CF she didn't ask for it she was born with it and if she can manage to keep cheerful well so can I!!
Yes of course I whinge but even the healthiest of people do that now and again but I always say I am a bit like a weeble keep knocking me down and I will keep bouncing back for as long as I can.
I think, because copd is not something that happens suddenly, but takes a long time to worsen, we don't notice the changes day to day or even month to month and adapt our lives slowly without even realising it. That's why, when we get an exacerbation/infection, it hits us very hard as suddenly we can't manage very well at all and our coping habits are not enough any more. When we are over the exacerbation/infection, we are so grateful and suddenly the sun is peeping through clouds again, metaphorically speaking!
For many of us with COPD a positive approach to things does help. My freinds say I just laugh it off in order to cope, guess I do because otherwise I would cry and what good would that do.Someone mentioned the sun its been shining all day here but bitterly cold, the mini daffs are out and the crocuses, they come up year after year no matter what conditions come, and brighten our darker days.,so lets hope the sun is out tommorrow too.
I can walk. I can drive.I got to work. In fact I do everything most people do. Just at a different pace sometimes. Who am I to complain. Always look on the bright side of life.
I try not to think about it too much. I'd rather get annoyed about being short of breath rather than miserable. A positive attitude makes me feel healthier. I wish I could help people to be more positive.
Why shoudn't I moan and grown? When I moan and groan I expect some sympathy ,not to be told to stop moaning and groaning.I am of the male species and I think we have the right to moan and groan.Moaning and groaning is inbuilt in the mind and I should be able to express my moans and groans.I am moaning and groaning because most of the time my moans and groans go unheard,but when my moans and groans go unheard I make my moans and groans louder until my moans and groans are heard.When my moans and groans are heard I have to moan and groan because nobody takes any notice of my moans and groans.But there I go moaning and groaning again because the female of the species moans and groans because I am moaning and groaning,I have no one to turn to to moan and groan about nobody taking any notice of my moaning and groaning.I hope I am not moaning and groaning to much about my moaning and groaning.I don't think there is known moaning and groaning cure so I will just have to carry on moaning and groaning.Please don't moan and grown at me,this is a plee for help to enable me to stop moaning and groaning.
Ha ha! Well, if didn't moan and groan my friends/family would be concerned and think I was ill, so I'd better keep on moaning and groaning just so they know I'm ok! PS: don't the words "moan" and groan" look weird when you see them so many times? Libby
That moaning and groaning took me a long time to write.I have waited for two minutes and still not received any advice on stoping my moaning and groaning.It seems that I will be moaning and groaning forever.
I can't do a direct reply as the system is saying Snap. Well, I hear your moans and groans and I understand why you moan and groan, but are moans and groans that helpful? I don't think so. Save your moans and grains for the GP or nurse or even DWP if needed. But we don't need your moans and groans King. We know what you are like.
My best bet is we may "say" things could be worse and other such things and others are always more deserving of support because they have it worse even when the reality may be far from that but in secret (sometimes even from ourselves) lurks that inward dread or outright fear that hides behind that mask we wear not just for our frineds and family but also more often than we will admit for oursleves.
If I'm being honest this latest addition to a growing list of ailments has shocked my to the very core in ways even I am still trying to evaluatre let alone try to resolve or manage. For perhaps only the 2nd or 3rd time in my 60 years I'm truly scared but struggling to find the courage to admit it to those who care for me.
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