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Am I missing something?

2greys profile image
21 Replies

What is with this compulsion for physical contact in a greeting. We have been told to avoid shaking hands, sensible and logical. What I don't understand is the bumping of fists reported at a football match, that is still hand contact. Then there is elbow bumping, yet we are told to sneeze or cough into the crook of your arm, which is next to your elbow. Bump elbows with a carrier who has used their elbow, then with an allergic sneeze, into your own elbow??.......... Surely a simple nod of recognition is all that is required without resorting to being touchy.

I find it rather weird that people want/need to do this. Then in another context touching is seen as assault. Very confusing for a Martian.

Why Do We Shake Hands?

sites.psu.edu/siowfa15/2015...

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2greys profile image
2greys
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21 Replies
Spacecat1 profile image
Spacecat1

Think the ladies did something to do with elbows so I read on line.

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44

I enjoyed reading that study tremendously! I wholeheartedly agree with the contents of your post too! I actually find kissing virtually unknown strangers uncomfortable. I Also find the double cheek air kiss irritating and silly.

Thinkhealthy profile image
Thinkhealthy in reply to RoadRunner44

The double cheek kissing thing is the norm here - andalucian greetings can be time consuming! I am not a big fan, and it is us women that are expected to kiss everyone - so I just take a physical step back out of range, smile warmly, and say how wonderful it is to see them, if it’s been a while. Less than a week and it’s just a “ hi how are you” no one seems to mind a bit of British reserve.

RoadRunner44 profile image
RoadRunner44 in reply to Thinkhealthy

What a good idea! I'm going to try that. With the current worries about corona virus it will be an ideal time (and excuse) to do this. Hopefully, others will follow.

cofdrop-UK profile image
cofdrop-UK

I think folks get very anxious about how they will be greeted and expected to be greeted - is it handshake, a hug, one kiss to the cheek, perhaps 2. Hate the elbow and the touching of shoes they are into since the Coro scare.

Personally I have always liked the eastern bow and particularly the prayered hands with a bow. I think it looks and feels a very peaceful, warm gesture. The handshake can sometimes be passive aggressive - take Trump and his grip and then pulling the person’s hand towards him.

Cx

2greys profile image
2greys in reply to cofdrop-UK

A nod or eastern bow are very similar. Both are acceptable to me.

I have always found being touched as very uncomfortable and annoying, especially when the other person is speaking to you, I have come across many who do that constant touching action as they speak to you.

shouty profile image
shouty in reply to 2greys

It's the ones that invade your personal space ...you take a step back and they lurch forward. Had a work colleague like that, it felt like a waltz round the room

Jaybird19 profile image
Jaybird19

How nice to find i agree about thix . Just two weeks sgo before zll this it was commented on that i did not hug. Not if i can help it

I will poke you with my stick 2greys and santise after touching your choice of contact, but if you have a stick too we could poke sticks :D

I had a hug from a nurse at the hospital the other day, I thought it was a bit dodgy really we will become a race of no physical contact which will be very sad as I am sure a hug a day helps you work, rest and play :D oh yeh that was a mars bar :P

in reply to

Oooo I would handle and kiss a Mars Bar any day. 🖐😘😋

Gingerapple profile image
Gingerapple

Good morning 2greys,

As far as I'm concerned they are all idiots, which just justifies that these people don't take this global crisis seriously and they are possibly quite young and have no issues with lung health🤔😳☹

frose profile image
frose

I couldn't agree more! But, then, I've never been comfortable with the touchy feely thing!

Grandmatojack profile image
Grandmatojack

I hate shaking hands always have. Don’t like any physical contact with people I don’t know. Always made a point of staying in at New Year for this reason as it was a free for all hugging and kissing. Hey with my children and family I am very huggy and kissy as my grandson says.

Aingeful profile image
Aingeful

I hug and kiss my family and will continue (unless I catch it!) I also hug my friends. I lived in Spain for several years where they are very touchy-feely! It would be a shame if I couldn't do it anymore,I would miss it.

in reply to Aingeful

I love hugs but not keen on any kissing since lung issue. But I would just love to hug, squeeze and kiss my great niece she is sooooooooooo gorgeous :D

cre8tiveGuy profile image
cre8tiveGuy

Well, here's the thing. The shaking of hands or a hug between women has been a pretty standard greeting for well, quite some time in society. Being a sufferer of COPD I've simply resorted to being up front about it say it's lovely to meet you and I would shake your hand but I have a lung condition and I can't afford to get sick - 99% of people have been fine with it. In Australia, men are big hand shakers, if you don't shake another mans hand when meeting them, you get some pretty weird looks but I just say, hey, look, really nice to meet you mate but right now I've got a serious lung condition and I can't afford to even get a cold, and most of the time without even really going into it, most people have been fine with it.

With my close friends we greet and leave each other with hugs and kisses.

Same with my husband we arrive and leave with pecks on the cheek.

At my old job a colleague ended up disciplined for kissing his girlfriend in the office!

All it was was pecks on the cheek and holding hands not anything heavy!

If it was heavy petting then yes I understand them being told off but that was just petty!

stamford1234 profile image
stamford1234

I know! I have never been a huggy, huggy person. My Italian SIL was offended because I don’t do the kiss on both cheeks. I always end up banging noses!

Carnival567 profile image
Carnival567

Why don’t we just say Good. Morning/Afternoon or Hello or Hi, depending on how well we know the person? And why is there a national discussion about it anyway?

Sandyeggo profile image
Sandyeggo

I really find this quite comical. Dogs sniff butts humans shake hands, hug, kiss whatever. I personally have no problem when someone is reaching out to hug me taking a step back. Rude perhaps but if I don’t want somebody touching me then they ain’t touching me! I have some big time Christian relatives and when I see them they insist on kissing me ON THE LIPS bcuz somewhere in their good book it says it’s holy. Whatever floats your boat. It’s just right now there’s so much fear due the virus going around the world but I have embraced and kissed people I loved who had full blown aids and I am also a licensed educator of the disease. Oh and paranoia will destroy ya. I would not be bustin slobs with someone infected w/the Corona bcuz I have a brain. Set boundaries or get a big dog. One of my old dogs years ago could make someone cross the street just through vibes if he thought they were going to be in arms reach of me. He also refused to let my husband in the bed one night after we had argued over something trivial. Trust me I wouldn’t try hugging YOU or shaking your hand if one of those big birds of yours was on your shoulder just as you wouldn’t want to come to close to me w/my service animal by my side. Her service is my protection! Peace be with you brother do what ya gotta do✌🏼

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