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hi i'm new to this community & would like to know if there i any help out there.

chelseaford profile image
27 Replies

i'm 49 yrs old living on the wirral. i have on family or friends here so i'm socially isolated & alone trying to cope with c.o.p.d & emphysema. i don't know where to turn to for help. i have no transport & find it hard to get about to meet people. plese if any of you know where i can turn to as it seems you need to be 55 or over to get help.

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chelseaford profile image
chelseaford
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27 Replies
stone-UK profile image
stone-UK

Hi

Apart from the wonderfull members who will answer any questions you may have.

Type you postcode in the search box on the following page ,seelink

blf.org.uk/BreatheEasy

This will show like-minded people in you area.

Sohara profile image
Sohara

Hi Chelseaford...welcome to the forum. What kind of help are you looking for?

Do you need real life friends, or do you need support from people here on this forum?

You will find lots of people willing to help on here, with help, good advice and friendship

chelseaford profile image
chelseaford in reply toSohara

yes i would like real life friends. any help is always welcome .

knitter profile image
knitter

Hi and welcome, joining this community is a good start, there are plenty of posts that you can relate to, gain information and reassurance, fun jokes and banter and help to put the world to rights.

There are Breathe Easy clubs, and the BLF helpline, I am sure if you were to ring them after the holiday they could help you. There is also a Pen Pal section on their website.

Vashti posts most days and her descriptions of her life in Ireland paint wonderful pictures, and we have talented photographers too. This is a world wide site so there are posts from America, South Africa and Australia as well as other countries.

Best wishes and keep looking in and posting.

angse profile image
angse

I feel for you I really do, I am not going to be much help here, advice you received very good, I'm grabbing at straws here, can social services not help you to get out or point you in the right direction to meet people, being isolated is the worst thing I can think of, I have COPDngetting out is hard but I now am determined to put one foot in front of the other no matter how painful, as the isolation is to much, it may be different for you though, also ask gp for help as well, I reallyndo hope you get the help you need. Annette

chelseaford profile image
chelseaford

thank you all for your replys you are all so kind. i will follow up on your advance. again thank you.

in reply tochelseaford

Hi chelseaford,

I am new to this site also. I live alone and get down but have started to feel better due to the wonderful people who use this site. The loneliness is the hardest thing especially at night or when you think its too late to contact someone. I am learning about this disease because I have stuck my head in the sand for too long so I'm not sure what help I could give you but if you need a friend I will reply to you.

I have learnt the last few days is to ask for help, I have booked an appointment to a Doc. Are there any groups near you? I don't have a Breathe Easy group near me but others who use this site seem to swear by it.

I hope you will get the support you need.

Val X

nannymag63 profile image
nannymag63 in reply tochelseaford

Hi Chelsea ford welcom we all in the same boat at diffrent stages please we are all friends o here please please don't hesitate to speak to any of us ahout anything u want or thats worrying you we will all try in whatever way we can to help please dont feel lonley chat away .

Hi nice to meet you and welcome to the site. Emphysema is copd as this is the umbrella term for that and Chronic Bronchitis. Do you know the stage you are at ie your lung function? Is it possible for you to get out at all as maybe you could go to a class and meet people? One thing you have going for you is that as a fellow northerner I know how friendly people are up there so hopefully you will manage to make friends. It's awful being socially isolated isn't it? and there are quite a few on here who are. Having a great site like this means we do at least have online friends, not as good as real life but sometimes beggars can't be choosers. Stick with us. x

chelseaford profile image
chelseaford in reply to

yes lung function it 20% not on oxygen as they say my recovery rate is ok. but have to use a nebuliser. as for going out i have to rely on cabs. so only go out to hospital or doctors appointments.

in reply tochelseaford

Ah you are severe then. It is very difficult for you to go out and I understand totally where you are coming from. I hope you are getting benefits like DLA (or PIP now). x

chelseaford profile image
chelseaford in reply to

i only get the lowest rate of mobility of pip. but i am contesting that. but i don't hold out much hope. i haven't even heard an other person voice in weeks. i only found this site by luck. i'm just feeling so low right now. yes i also suffer from depression. social services rang me on the 12th of last month say someone would ring me back to arrange a visit to assess my needs. but not heard anything yet. but at least now i have found this site.

kimmy59 profile image
kimmy59

Hello and welcome to the forum.

You've already been given great advice, please don't think your alone someone is normally on her to chat with. I wonder if you have a Consultant, also a Community Respiratory Team in your area your GP would know, they really help me.

Feel free to ask us anything.

Kim xxxx

in reply tokimmy59

I regularly see the respiratory nurses yet when I have an exasipation I do not get through to ARAS,4admissions last year, treated at home by myself this year 3 lots of ant bio so far back on steroids

brambles65 profile image
brambles65

Hi i`m in the same position as yoruself im new to this and live alone with no transport of any kind of help feel free to chat if you want ,Liz

Hi Chelsea, a very warm welcome. I to have 20 per cent FEV, so i know its a struggle. Just a thought, could you not get a mobility scooter? I have just got one, and hope to get out a lot more when it gets warmer. Depression is an awful thing and i really do feel for you. Seems you have been in touch with the right people, so fingers crossed.Keep posting, and try to have a lovely relaxing day. Xx

Bevvy profile image
Bevvy

I know it is difficult. I also feel quite socially isolated. But sometimes only YOU can make changes. You said social services rang you last month but nothing since then. Ring them back! They are over worked and often it is only those that shout loudest that get help.

Like the suggestion re mobility scooter. I have 2 and am looking forward to the warmer weather to get out in the fresh air more.

Do you read? Often libraries have book clubs - good way to meet new people.

Again YOU have to make the effort... Which I know is easier said than done. I too have severe depression amongst other things so I know it's hard.

katieoxo60 profile image
katieoxo60

Hi Chelsea, welcome to the site, we can chat and give you personal tips from experience. I live alone so understand where you are coming from. I am a lot older so there are different services for me. You definitely need an urgent assessment of needs. We have a service called ring& ride for disabled and older people, it is a service to take door to door to get you out, there is a small charge but much cheaper than Taxis. Each Council has a different service so it's worth inquiring , ring the disabled services section of your local council, the number should be in the phone book.Age UK does help those over fifty, so you could just tell a little white lie about your age and be 50 not 49 :) A PR group would be good for you too, and they often supply transport for severe COPD patients but you need to ask your GP for referral to Pulmonary Rehab (PR). There are also groups for people with depression caused by Physical health issues.Even someone coming in to help you would be contact, there are buddy schemes in larger cities where someone helps you to go out if that is what you would like. Hope this helps for when you do get your assessment of needs. Speak to you soon, every best wish x

Suzy6 profile image
Suzy6

Hi Chelsea, you are no longer alone now you have found this site. I don't live on my own but at the moment have serious health issues to overcome. I often feel isolated and depressed but thankfully for some wonderful friends on here I'm coping. Take up some of the lovely people here who have said PM them. Share memories, jokes or just general chit chat with them, it will raise you up. Please feel free to PM me. We can weep, wail, swear and laugh together. Love Suzyxxx

Offcut profile image
Offcut

From what was said earlier that the social service generally do not respond as we would hope and need a little help by a call to remind them that they have not been in touch. I would look at a mobility scooter to get you out more. I have multi conditions and am alone when the wife is at work, but I am looking at a scooter in the summer so I can get out and go to my nearest shop 800 yards away.

Try and write down the things you love and the things that annoy you. Post them on here and see the response? We are not completely PC on here ;) But extreme views may not go down to well? Tell us about the good times your life work etc. (unless you are a spy?)

Be Well

sassy59 profile image
sassy59

Hi, just to say welcome to this amazing site. Everyone is very supportive and you will get some wonderful advice too. Do get in touch with the BLF (click on the red balloon at top of page) nurses as they may be able to help you. You do not have to be over 55 to get help but you do need that help right now. Please do not despair as you have come to the right place. Take care. xxxx

rfcjackie profile image
rfcjackie

Hi chelsea welcome to this fantastic site with all these Kind wonderful people who are always here to help in any way they can aye am 53 and still fairly new here aswell hope you feel better soon love jackie xx

helingmic profile image
helingmic

Hi, I lived in Birkenhead for 10 years and started coughing then, in 1973!

First, for your emphysema, can you find out from the hospital you go to, or your GP if you can be referred to a pulmonary nurse team. This is the sort of person that deals with the day to day fears, advice on drugs, advice on shortness of breath and even advice on exercises, because exercises is vital to maintain your health.

For transport, Is there a volunteer bureau where you are? They probably organise transport - I use volunteer transport widely; it has helped me not only to go to hospital, but to go locally. It's cheaper than taxis and usually drivers will take you to a place and wait for you, and take you back.

Can you enquire from Social Services if you can benefit from an electric "buggy". Have you got the right benefit, like severe disablement allowance - this gives you money to pay for say, the volunteer bureau. This you should ask at the Department of Work and Pension.

I don't know, these are just pieces of information that may help, as I don't know your situation precisely. Hope you get somewhere with this for a start. Mic

FarmerD profile image
FarmerD

Hello Chelsea,my first reply seems to have vanished( it does that sometimes on this site) so I,ll try again.I am 59 with very severe emphysema Fev1 20%.I got my PIP both mobility and care enhanced rate so you should too,nothing to do with age it,s to do with how illness affects every day life.How long everything takes to do ,how difficult it is and how out of breath we get.Make sure you appeal,go to any appointments in a wheelchair( you should be able to get a free one from the council ) Don,t get out of the wheelchair,they,ll try and trick you to.Tell them about your worst days as those are the ones that count,you are entitled to this benefit because of your illness.It is NOT charity we have all paid towards it.The C.A.B.were a great help to me also get in touch with the occupational health service.The Samaritans will also help with meeting people.We will always try to help here .Keep in touch and let us hear of your progress,best of luck.Regards ,D.

chelseaford profile image
chelseaford

i haven't got my appeal date yet. but i'm not the kind of person that could do anything like that. i'm waiting for social services to get back to me. first i need is to get out of this first floor flat. but thanks any way

stillmovin profile image
stillmovin

Hi chelseaford, I understand what you are saying about feeling you are in the 'middle' group where there doesn't seem to be the help normally only provided to over 55s. I am there too - but have tried hard to find what I can that is available. Take things slowly. You may need to build up contacts gradually by getting yourself out to social groups. It is not easy at first but be very patient and start by getting access to local transport services for those who have disabilities. I did this for years and it was the only way I could get to some daytime art classes, for example. I didn't care that I was the youngest one using the transport, the important thing was to get out of my little one bedroom flat. I know what you are feeling! Be very kind on yourself you will get more confidence and gradually feel better for getting out and about. That is the first step. Work on the other things mentioned by all the great responses given here to you too - but make sure you don't leave yourself stuck indoors with long spells of gloomy thoughts...there are so many of us in your position - you are not alone my dear friend. xxxxx

knitter profile image
knitter

Hi Chelsea, I have been thinking of you over the past few days and hoping that your situation has improved a little, as others have said take small steps and any other questions please ask.....we really are a friendly bunch.

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