Ode to Christmas.: A golden oldie I... - Lung Conditions C...

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Ode to Christmas.

eightyplus profile image
13 Replies

A golden oldie I just remembered, hopefully it will still bring a smile for Christmas.

Twas the night before Christmas at Rock-Away Rest,

and all of us seniors were looking our best.

Our glasses, how sparkly, our wrinkles, how merry;

Our punch bowl held prune juice plus three drops of sherry.

A bed sock was taped to each walker, in hope

That Santa would bring us soft chocolate and soap.

We surely were lucky to be there with friends,

Secure in this residence and in our Depends.

Our grand kids had sent us some Christmas crafts,

Like angels in snowsuits and penguins on rafts.

The dental assistant had borrowed our teeth,

And from them she'd crafted a holiday wreath.

The bed pans, so shiny, all stood in a row,

Reflecting our candle's magnificent glow.

Our supper so festive -- the joy wouldn't stop --

Was creamy warm oatmeal with sprinkles on top.

Our salad was green jelly, so jiggly and great,

Then puree of fruitcake was spooned on each plate.

The social director then had us play games,

Like "Where Are You Living?"! and "What Are Your Names?"

Old Grandfather Hooper was feeling his oats,

Proclaiming that reindeer were nothing but goats.

Our resident wanderer was tied to her chair,

In hopes that at bedtime she still would be there.

Security lights on the new fallen snow

Made outdoors seem noon to the old folks below.

Then out on the porch there arose quite a clatter

(But we are so deaf that it just didn't matter).

A strange little fellow flew in through the door,

Then tripped on the sill and fell flat on the floor.

Twas just our director, all togged out in red.

He jiggled and chuckled and patted each head.

We knew from the way that he strutted and jived

Our social- security checks had arrived.

We sang -- how we sang -- in our monotone croak,

Till the clock tinkled out its soft eight-p.m. stroke.

And soon we were snuggling deep in our beds.

While nurses distributed nocturnal meds.

And so ends our Christmas at Rock-Away Rest.

Before long you'll be with us, We wish you the best.

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eightyplus
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13 Replies
Puffthemagicdragon profile image
Puffthemagicdragon

Amusing ! :)

Lungs last long enough and this is waiting looking for a yay must have one

pergola1 profile image
pergola1

That made me smile, and yet it bought back memories of working in the local cottage hospital. We worked hard to make it festive, decorated the wards, presents for each patient. All the patients were of a certain age. Now I am!!

rick1 profile image
rick1

A Merry Christmas!

newlands profile image
newlands

That was lovely and so true! love Dorothyxxx

jools profile image
jools

Hi Eightyplus - made me laugh out loud Julie xx

phillips1 profile image
phillips1

That is great Eighty, I loved it. Mind you, I have got a warped sense of humour. Thanks for posting it.

Bobby

longlungs profile image
longlungs

haha yep bought a smile to my face thanx eightyplus . :) Janexx

KingoftheCocktails profile image
KingoftheCocktails

Gives me something to look forward to

KOTC

DozyDormouse profile image
DozyDormouse

That made me laugh so much I now have to go for a doze :D - Dozy x

strudle profile image
strudle in reply to DozyDormouse

That was great!!

That was great & probably oh so true! Is that our waited fate?!! Xxx

katieoxo60 profile image
katieoxo60

Thank you eightyplus, reminded me of my days working with the elderly mentally infirm and being instructed to purify food to a runny mess. Thank goodness times have changed.

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