Paraprosdokians is not a disease!!! - Lung Conditions C...

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Paraprosdokians is not a disease!!!

Lurcherman profile image
12 Replies

Paraprosdokians (Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous. Enjoy!

1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.

2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it's still on my list.

3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.

5. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

6. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

7. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism, to steal from many is research.

9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.

10. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, Notify:' I put 'DOCTOR'.

11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

12. You do not need a parachute to skydive, you only need a parachute to skydive twice.

13. I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure.

14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.

15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.

17. I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it is getting harder and harder for me to find one now.

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Lurcherman profile image
Lurcherman
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12 Replies
Lurcherman profile image
Lurcherman

Hee hee, I like number three the best!!

knitter profile image
knitter

Very witty...enjoyed them

scrobbitty profile image
scrobbitty

Hahahaha - I can relate to each and every one of them, barring the bloke one - still a woman last time I looked :)

Mavary profile image
Mavary

Hi Lurcerman. Loved it. No: 11 makes me glad I am a woman.

Lurcherman profile image
Lurcherman in reply toMavary

Me to a teeee heeeee heeeeee ;-)))

sadie1951 profile image
sadie1951

These are really great Lurcherman and the simple fact is, they're all true! Sadie xx

longlungs profile image
longlungs

So very true and good fun to read thanx Lurcherman :) Janexx

silversurfer profile image
silversurfer

Number 5 and 15 for me :) :)

Lurcherman profile image
Lurcherman in reply tosilversurfer

Like it !!

Cuddy profile image
Cuddy

Cleverly funny :-)

appyalison profile image
appyalison

Thank you for those; very witty. :-) :-) Alison

undine profile image
undine

very good thank you x

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