Did I tell you about my marriage...........SO SAD.........KOTC

[KingoftheCocktails]

..................................My Marriage

I am a typical macho man and I married a good-looking girl.

After the wedding I laid down the following rules (start as I meant to go on)

''I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what ever time I want------

and I don't expect any hassle from you.

I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell you I won't be home for dinner.

I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card playing with my old mates, and don't you give me a hard time about it.

Those are my rules. Any comments?''

Well! You could have knocked me down with a feather, do you know what she said ?

''No ,That's fine with me.

Just understand that there will be sex

here at seven o'clock every night...

wether you are here or not.''

SO SAD

KOTC

BREATHE EASY = FRIENDSHIP

Any comments about Breathe Easy, find out at your local groups monthly meeting.

Advice about Breathe Easy from BLF Helpline 03000 030 555 Mon -Fri 9am 5pm

[Hidden]

Why 7 pm? The BBC One Show is on then. But enjoyed this joke.

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

For you annieseed it will be 8pm

[Gidge]

Excuse me - The Archers is on just after 7 !!!!!!

[CornishBrian in reply to Gidge]

You can do the same with sex as with the Archers....save it up to Sunday morning and have an omnibus.

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to CornishBrian]

Ah, but will you be home Cornish Brian?

[CornishBrian in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

Sorry but the Archers is located in England, not Cornwall. Borcetshire, I believe.

[Hidden in reply to CornishBrian]

thought the archers were in London under the bridges,

[CornishBrian in reply to Hidden]

Might be but I always thought they were filled with "ferty fousand fevers on a french frushes froat".

[Hidden in reply to CornishBrian]

hope the missus is still sane

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Gidge]

8 pm OK for you gidge as well

[Gidge in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

Hang on a minute - both of us at 8???What a man !

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Gidge]

Different nights! Gidge

[Gidge in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

Oh - only once a week then ?

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Gidge]

You better ask my wife, she knows it all

[Gidge in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

Aha ! I knew we'd get to the truth of this eventually.........

[longlungs]

What a great lady shes got your number!, oh how we laughed.Janexx

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to longlungs]

Great Lady !Huh. I'll let you know some more about her one day Jane

[appyalison]

Very reasonable terms. Think yourself lucky king. Alison

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to appyalison]

Luck doesn't enter into it. Someday I'm going to write the !!!!!!! Alison

[mustcarryon]

what a woman! Give her a gold medal.

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to mustcarryon]

Give her a shovel more like mustcarryon !

[Mocarey]

She's got your card marked! Lol

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Mocarey]

No chance of that Mocary

[Hidden]

What is sex?????????

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

Before seven berwick

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Berwick -I have always wondered what sex was. Husband is away this weekend having a break, so feel free to explain.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

tough question that,whats the prize

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

I'll give the prize. No one on this site will have the correct type of mind to be able to give the correct answer carrotts

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I always thought it was for putting coal or tatties in. he he

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

No ,wrong. It is for doing what you do when lying on what you put the coal or tatties in.

Hee HEE

KOTC

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

Not openly annieseed ,maybe in a PM. We don't want to go leading the nice ladies astray

[Hidden in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

AND what do you think I am not one of the naaaice ladies.

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

Not at all annieseed. I do not want for you to lose being a nice lady. But having reread the question it would appear that neither Berwick or yourself knows the answer to it anyway

KOTC

[Hidden in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

it depends on which part of the country you come from in scotland you always put you tatties in the sack. What we lie on is a bed he he he

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

We get into the sack for ?????????

[Hidden in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

easy,socks,

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

NO

[Hidden]

Met your match King? Hehe! xxx

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

Do you really think so Wendells ?

[Hidden in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

Lets check, Wendells, shall we, with King.

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to Hidden]

And the answer is?annieseed

[nanaber]

hat gave me a laugh heheheh good on her

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to nanaber]

Good on her, that's not what I would say nanaber

[bubbles37]

great 1 kotc

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to bubbles37]

The truth is always great bubbles37.But in this case ,I beg to differ

[bubbles37 in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

aw well nice 2 c a woman getting her own back wish I was that clever.

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to bubbles37]

I only ever see her back!

[bubbles37 in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

that's a good thing, glad I don't have that problem (only with cats & parrot)

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to bubbles37]

No problem for me, I prefer to look at her back!!!!!

[thatcham1939]

Good for her, you,ll be to knackered after 7PM, so make no plans

jan

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to thatcham1939]

Ah well, eases the workload, and boy is she hard work jan

[appyalison]

This has been hilarious to read. Thank you everyone. BRILLIANT! Alison

[KingoftheCocktails in reply to appyalison]

Thank you Alison. Isn't it nice that we can all be happy together.

[Hidden in reply to KingoftheCocktails]

so it is,