PTSD

[Poulson]

I have just being having flashbacks to my PPP on set. I believe what caused my PPP was the fact that I was abused as a child. All through my pregnancy there were programmes on the TV saying that if you were abused you will go on to abuse your children. I tried not to pay much attention, but subconsciously I must have taken it on board. I recall going into labour with my daughter at 3.25am on a Saturday morning. Now, 30 years later I look at the clock at 3.25pm every day.

I recall telling my mother my waters had broke and she gave me two painkillers for the pain. I went to hospital and my daughter was born at 12.15pm. I would not touch her and the midwife had to put my hand on her. I recall the midwife taking my daughter into the nursery for night-time feeds and I just wanted to sleep.

I recall the doctor telling me when he checked my daughter over that she could go home but I could not, he must have known then I was ill. I gave birth to my son 7 years later and suffered PPP again. I met my ne husband in 2004 and we tied for another baby . I got caught pregnant but I lost it. I suffered PPP after the miscarriage. I too suffered from PMT, but I am now going through the menopause, which brings its own problems.

I am now looking forward to the future. I have got my education and keep away from toxic relationships such as my family. I am working again part-time.

Best Wishes X

[Lilybeth Volunteer]

Hello Poulson

It's good to reflect on how far you have come in spite of childhood trauma, a difficult pregnancy and the onset of PP. So pleased that you are now feeling more settled and looking forward to the future. Take care.