I had my baby 4 months ago and was diagnosed with PPP a week after my baby was born. I had previously had OCD and it seems to be on its way back. I also have depression now.
I feel like all I want to do is hide in bed. Does anyone else feel like this?
Written by
Han30
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I had pp last October after my baby was 4 months, I was hospitalized from Dec to end of Jan 17 and began experiencing depression in February after I was discharged and still suffering now. My depression came on gradually and over time I lost all my confidence in caring for my baby, she is now being cared for by her father due to me being admitted to hospital again two months ago. looking back I realise I didn't recognize the depression just kept thinking it was me and I wasn't doing enough but it was the illness, my advice would be to tell your GP and CMHT how your feeling so they can treat you asap and catch it straight away. It's only now after a Second opinion I'm on the way to finally receiving the right treatment. Don't beat yourself up as it's not anything your doing wrong it sounds like the illness which is most likely off the back of the PP. I hope this gives you the reassurance you need and you get the right help so you can begin to feel yourself again. Take good care and hope you start feeling well again soon!
Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your experience. I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with depression and what seem to be OCD traits. I don't have any experience of OCD but I did have PP when I was 23 and 29 and suffered what seemed like an endless depression in recovery.
I had severe depression following my second PP ..... my bed was my sanctuary and safe place! I hid under the covers even though every effort was made to coax me from my bed. I doubted I would ever be good enough to cope, even though my first son was then six years old.
When I was discharged from general psychiatric care I was visited regularly by professionals. Do you have regular reviews with your G.P or mental health team? Perhaps you can ask your G.P to visit you at home? I hope you have a good support network around you as it's very early in your recovery from PP and also worrying about OCD is an added challenge.
There are PP Insider Guides "Recovery after Postpartum Psychosis" and "Postpartum Psychosis : A Guide for Partners" the link being app-network.org/what-is-pp/... which might be helpful. There is also a brilliant blog ppsoup.com with shared experiences and information.
It must be so hard feeling as you do and I know it's not easy to lift your mood but with good medical care and support you will fully recover eventually from PP.
Take really good care of yourself and please keep writing here if it helps. PP mums are amazing
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