Protection from services

[Bluelady-sing]

I last went to GP for my prescription to be reduced as planned. I asked about a gynae problem the Gp asked for my LMP ( of course as they are trying to mentor the rises of me being pregnant) in fact they are obsessed with this risk. What I want to know is how can I protect myself from services, and preserve my enjoyment and right to become a parent.

[Ellie_at_APP Partner]

Hi Pumpkins,

I know that you have written about this concern before. I'm not sure of your personal situation, and why your are so scared of services, and why you feel they wouldn't support you if you wanted to have a baby.

But I would say that I am sure you would find it helpful to be open and honest with any services who are supporting you so you can get support in your decision. This will be viewed really positively by them, and they will be able to support you. Speak to them about wanting to have another baby, and get advice. You can also see if there is a perinatal mental health team in your local area who can advise you too. Perhaps there is one particular health professional who you feel you can trust more than others, who you could speak to initially?

I hope this is helpful.

Ellie

[Bluelady-sing in reply to Ellie_at_APP]

Elle I have never had a baby I am 40 and desperate. some days I feel so sad..others am ok

[Ellie_at_APP Partner in reply to Bluelady-sing]

Hi Pumpkins,

It is really hard. It took a few years for me to conceive my son, and it was really hard wanting a baby but it not happening, a different situation from yourself but I understand the desire to have a baby.

I really would encourage you to seek advice about possibly having a baby, or at least to speak with someone about your feelings about it if it is something that for health reasons you / services feel wouldn't be a good idea.

There is a lot of support out there (if you're in the UK at least, which is really the only services that I know about) for women planning to have a baby but have a mental health diagnosis. If there is a perinatal mental health team in your area they should be able to meet you for pre-conception counselling for example, to advise you about your options. You would need to be referred by your GP/mental health team. But again, I don't know about your personal situation and why you feel services wouldn't want you to have a baby.

Take care,

Ellie

[jododo in reply to Bluelady-sing]

We put off having kids for a long time because of my mental and physical health and my husbands mental health. After 8 years we finally felt ready but my first pregnancy ended in (very early) miscarriage. Then we had my son.

When my son was 4 we finally plucked up the courage to try for a second child. But I had 2 ectopic pregnancies followed by a bizarre pregnancy related cancer. 2 years on and still no joy. I don't even know if it is possible for me anymore but it's hard to get answers. In the mean time we keep trying.

I know it's not the same because I do have a child, but I do know how you feel.

The really important thing while you try is to look after your mental health. I'm assuming you're here because you have an existing condition too and are "high risk" for pp (please correct me if I'm wrong). All may go smoothly for you, but you need to make sure as much support is in place as possible, and that means engaging with the services involved. They are looking for your best interests and your potential child's.

[Bluelady-sing]

Un fortunately I have had such bad experiences being with services is too stressful