Clear the decks.
Toxic.: Clear the decks. - Anxiety and Depre...
Toxic.
Written by
gerrerd
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140 Replies
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thank you gerrard ive been wanting to talk with yu im v upset anothee shock today i have been reported for having a sense of humour 2 friends have left and im not sure why im here im trying not to let toxic activity drive me off too but health comes first
Sillysausage234 in reply to
you can please some people sometimes ,but you can’t please all the people all the time 🎼….ss ..feat..Bob Marley
gerrerd in reply to
If you stand up to them they move on to someone else, so its about kicking arses when needed, they dont like it, They hide behind a front that quivers and cracks.
in reply to gerrerd
thanks G i go by my intuition mainly and i guess its hard on here as its vertual but in person you can get a better picture of someone its jekyl hyde types i have always been conned by like mysogynist boyfriends and its like i started to think if somrones really nice there too good to be true as them sort usually are, but i dont think ill ever change much i tend to see the good in people and know no ones perfect certainly not me ivd been bullied all my life even by my cat 😾😂mam said you dont need a man yuv got a mysogynist cat 😁😺wel look forward to more fun on your posts soon not sure what mindful philosophy you can do on fruit n veg 🤔😂😂😂
gerrerd in reply to
Always watch what people do, not what they say, is my way of sussing them out. Ive two Robins nesting in my garden feeding their chicks today. Mind you I can sense if people are good or bad now. Or unhappy etc.
in reply to gerrerd
yes thats right re actions speak louder than words maby post your robin tomorror, yes im perceptive of peoples mood im v intuitive ive bonded with certain ones on here straight away like charlotte and snowdaze v similar in certain ways there walkers as someone said leve then back i am same left a few times but i realise ill be back in a day lol so whats point 😂
gerrerd in reply to
Never let your candle flame flicker no matter what comes before you.
in reply to gerrerd
its not easy been so sensituve but i know im strong and bounce back quick im lucky to be like that some would go right down and stay down, and we so need to be on our guard internets noted for dodgy ones scammers trolls etc overall on here there nice
This is what My hubby always says. It's not what they say...it's how they act. When words don't match actions... that's a HUGE Red flag
in reply to LifeIsThePitts
when you said red i thought of a huge🍄hahaha sorry
LifeIsThePitts in reply to
Red MUSHROOM 🍄???
in reply to LifeIsThePitts
i just edited it
in reply to LifeIsThePitts
🤭yes
LifeIsThePitts in reply to
I'd eat a huge red 🍄😋
in reply to LifeIsThePitts
im having carrot and mushroom casserole tomorror may throw few rude looking parsnips in 😂💛
LifeIsThePitts in reply to
Oooo can I come over for lunch??
in reply to LifeIsThePitts
yes ill do a post menu 😂😂😂good night rude veg sequil 😂😂
Something I read that sticks in my head
If I've cut you out of my life, chances are you handed me the scissors.
Toxic out and peace in
🐬
That scenario dosent actually work in practice though as maybe youre at fault for having a hissy fit ….🤔
You did not just write that! There is a word for that but it's not allowed here and I don't want you to report me.
I'm talking long term toxic people . People I assumed I had to stay in a relationship with. I've been handed scissors my whole life. I just finally learned how to use them
Beware ....
❤️🐬
……
…..
Hahaha
Back off. My mom has scissors :)
❤️🦔
Not-a-mouse. A superhero!
in reply to Nothing_but_books
if your there come to the post read rest of it yul LOL 😂😂🌛good night just woke from.a bad dream ok now
Hi Herman 🦔 wish i could give you smooches 😘
He would love that
❤️🐬
:)
in reply to Dolphin14
i luv that 🤗H with mummy you look nice Dolphin you gotta hole in your back 😁
in reply to Sillysausage234
me and dolphin both have scissors so yes back off 😁😺and pix is ready to nip you
,
Know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold em, know when to walk away and know when to run like hell.
and know when to apologise if you have a bad hair day ….maybe a suggestion
Taking responsibility for your own actions then making amends, apologies, whenever possible is very important. But one must be able to recognize their mistakes and not all can immediately recognize them if or at all. . If it’s just a bad hair day, then it’s a bit more tolerated and easy to fluff off..a person doesn’t feel the necessity to cut and run to protect themselves.
ermmm…..yeah …🤔
process that SS
washing my hair
I just did.... it will be drying for a week.
😂 🤣
anything more than 2 lines I zone out
It's well known. Not sure how you can sit for hours watching ⚽️ with that attention issue
if what I read dosent resonate with a song in the first 2 lines it’s lost on me ….it’s just how I roll …long theological debates that only have meaning to the o.p. Are lost in my fluffy I cloud ⛅️
Thank you fir explaining. You must be able to find a song about toxicity? Hissy fits? Scissors ?
in reply to Dolphin14
oh thats what it is hello quick strange funny comment 🙄then bye then shoot dont say too much or im gone no H or cats please or ill be gone even longer haha🤷🤭😁
Women with scissors Run.
😂
Some people woke on the wrong side of the bed today
❤️🐬
I know how that is. Some mornings I wake up on the floor on the wrong side of the bed.
LMFAO
Well as you know I barely sleep so this doesn't apply to me
lol Well, then, for argument sake, since you never sleep, you choose which side to lay on unless there’s an obstruction blocking your choice. 🛌
in reply to Dolphin14
going to report you 😂😂F letter or did yu mean flipping i use that😁
Dolphin14 in reply to
Of course..... it says what the flipping
in reply to Dolphin14
oh thats ok im sorry i doubted your language i know yud never say anything dodgy or rude your a very innocent lady 😂with a purer than pure mind🤔🤭did you enjoy your carrot soup fir tea please dont report me i mean C soup
Dolphin14 in reply to
I would never break a rule you know this. C soup was fabulous
Thank you
in reply to Dolphin14
i had something funny i said it to hope for me not realising so had to put photo on of it ill save it and do it on a joke at some point ill tell yu on pm lol gona watch tv for bit shoukders bend its on charge 😁
what’s this summers project for you ray ?
Caravans nearly done, Conservatory also. A workshop studio is on the planning board, early stages yet. But could go off on one and do anything! Learning Chess, Learning to play the guitar left handed due to childhood hand injury. Up grade on the pond is being thought about.
in reply to Sillysausage234
rays growing fruit n veg this summer hope it is acceptable for the forum🤔😂i had a cucumber sandwhich fir tea 🤭whoops dont report me cucumber may offend😁
Sillysausage234 in reply to
join a site for harvest festivities
in reply to Sillysausage234
good idea 😁😁as long as i can pop back here and post the rude looking veg 🙄😂
SS
Great idea it will keep her from getting banned
in reply to Dolphin14
im booking a holliday at the naturist campsite will i be able to post the campers in there birthday suits 🙄🧐🤫
Dolphin14 in reply to
🙄.....
in reply to Sillysausage234
😂😂😂just having banana on toast inspired to do new post food for thought coming up today so many been saying oh please dont stop posting your fruit n veg one said its great to have a belly laugh so here we go next post coming up 😁kept within hu guidelines of course
breakfast v healthy
SS
Won't open
Can you explain?
not getting involved in the ladies chenanegans thank you …bye
🙄
in reply to Dolphin14
yours 😁
🤭
Dolphin14 in reply to
I love this!!
in reply to Sillysausage234
think we need H and pixie to gang up on yu again 🙄😾
Ladies chenanegans.
colour
in reply to gerrerd
hahahahaha ss looks better than i thought 🙄🧐🤭
gerrerd in reply to
The ladies are saying its game on when the viagra kicks in !!!
in reply to gerrerd
Hahahahaha G your hilarious wait till i tell Dolphin and think ss prob watch in background dernt show his face lol 😂😂😂😂
in reply to Sillysausage234
hahahaha but our campsites a naturist one, theres a nice record on after the vid you prob didnt notice called thats what friends are for how bizare i luv that record to 😊
Sillysausage234 in reply to
it’s ray’s favourite go to tune
in reply to Sillysausage234
haha ye was gona say you put it on for him 🤭😂
in reply to Sillysausage234
i like the bit keep smiling keep shining thats me twinkly star 🌟😁ill foccus on them words i luv the christopher cross one i saw sailing one of my faves
Sillysausage234 in reply to
twinkly spam
in reply to Sillysausage234
thats me more to come id addicted to posting lol just had the chris cross on i luv that so much thats me sailing out to see me and pixie new life free no cares no worries one can dream,i might cancel house sale by a housr boat or camper van LOL cant drive tho, cant leave mam n pix not travel well so maby one day,i love the others on there from my era the 8os simply red style councel i been listening to music lately its soothing
Sillysausage234 in reply to
Ray can drive anything
in reply to Sillysausage234
😠🤯😂
in reply to Sillysausage234
you can drive me round the bend and are 😂😂
True.
in reply to Sillysausage234
need bigger caravan as gerrards invited CharlyBear lol charlottes back with us on here now lets hope charley the cat doesnt come or there be hell on 😂singing that funny song dare you put it on hahaha
in reply to gerrerd
yours 😁im sure theyll turn up at some point ill pop later the cartoon is best laugh ive had all day i was v good on my banana post almost 🤭
😁
in reply to Sillysausage234
your looking good lard A-s on gerrards photo OMG 🙄🧐😂😂you can bunk up with him in caravan 🙄😂😂😂
gerrerd in reply to
🛌🛌single beds then!
Very true and often hard to do. The toxic people I have been unable to completely cut out are family. But I limit my interactions.
that is very true i wish i realized that during my high school years 🙏
Twinklystar directed me to your post. It's been a rough week. I'm still unhappy about how some people here get to run off others because of juvenile behavior. We're supposed to support each other through our shared experiences and not tear each other down in spite of them.
So thank you for this lovely reminder 🎗️ self awareness, and boundaries...I will continue to be the bigger person and commit myself to higher learning while helping to heal myself through that process.
Although my inner child would much like to deal with the issues in a different manner. But... she's just not a peace keeper, so Bertha gets to stay in time out....where MANY OTHER HU users should keep their egos in check.😘cuz if you're not HELPING others.. you're HURTING them... period.
Thank you for this. I see so many red flags that I'm afraid to post anything. It also seems so very clicquesque that I don't even feel very welcome here. I left Facebook in hopes of more mature support and less toxicity but I'm thinking there's no escape from it.
O yes. I had hoped that on a mental health site that immature juvenile stunted and repressed behavior would be a minimum...but alas, the internet provides anonymity and fosters troll-like behavior in any setting. I've learned. I've never had a FB page, Instagram, nothing! This is the only online community I participate in.
I really pick and choose who and what to respond to.
I was searching for online depression support groups 15 months ago when I had decided to end my life after 30+ yrs of suffering from untreated and undertreated and mistreated depression and rampant anxiety. I was invited to join an invitation only small research group on Treatment Resistant Depression here on HU. That forum has saved my life. This one I joined as an afterthought once I became familiar with the HU format. I spend 90% of my time with the other group, though.
We've cultivated an amazing group of TRD people over there. No bickering or arguing. It's truly like a chosen family. We support each other in amazing ways. I'm still participating here too. But I probably will not post anything again on my own. Just support and encourage those that are here for the primary reason of healing themselves and ignore the rest.
I find myself being envious of you having found that group. I'm a trauma survivor and have been bedridden for 2 years after open heart surgery and a cardiologist who refused to see me in person for 6 months after the surgery. She overmedicated me on meds that I couldn't tolerate and when I went down to 98lbs she stopped all my meds abruptly and I instantly went into withdrawal. Now I am in chronic pain and on more meds that I can't tolerate and they keep trying to make it a psychiatric issue so they don't have to admit that they screwed up. No one is interested in helping me and I have not been able to find a support group in 2 years. I also don't use any other social media platforms as they are all toxic and I was hoping to find some support here but alas it is the internet and if family and friends don't care why would I think that strangers would give a damn? Thank you for your support.
Dearest Beater, I'm sorry you feel so forgotten and alone. It broke my heart when I
read your responses. When I came on this site 7 years ago, it was to provide support
and caring to the best of my ability having gone through emotional and physical pain
myself. I didn't have a support team when going through my anxiety and Benzo
withdrawal. Family & Friends just didn't understand which came out like they didn't
care. And so I walked the road alone. Determined that I would find some way to
take away my emotional pain from physical and situational issues.
YouTube became my friend, my mentor. I turned to it and researched and listened
to everything I could to find a way to not feel so alone.
I'm here today because I never gave up. I won back control of my life. Pain still exists
but is managed by my Mind Control. Nothing in Life is a guarantee for happiness
or cure. We must stay strong enough to look for the good and ignore the Toxic.
I hope you don't give up on our community or yourself. My Best to You xx
Hey agora... nice to see you here. I just love your messages and open heart. Thanks for being you and shining 🌟 your light outward for those lost in the dark...like a beacon from a lighthouse in turbulent water.❤️🩹
Life..you touch my heart each time with your kind words Thank you xx
Thank you so much for your response and support. I don't often meet people who understand a benzo withdrawal and ergo I don't even mention it but that is what happened when they stopped all meds abruptly. I have already survived a sequel and Celexa withdrawal and it took years. My body was just not strong enough yet to endure beta blocker withdrawal and benzo withdrawal at the same time and I am back on a different benzo now because the other one was having a rebound effect making everything worse including damaging my central nervous system. I have been trying to practice mind control but there are so many charletons out there that I don't know who to trust anymore. I have spent a fortune on courses, books, programs and devices which all have not worked. Do you have a special person that you follow? I am in constant pain and would love to get at least part of my life beck. Thank you so much for your response and congratulations on your amazing survival journey.
Dennis Simsek the anxiety guy on YouTube. Gabor mate for trauma healing, some ADHD info. Andrew huberman scientific research on a TON of subjects. Dan Harris Ten percent happier podcast. Eric Zimmer The one you Feed podcast. Tara brach, Sharon Salzburg, jack Kornfield for Buddhist principles and meditation. Insight Timer meditation app...best Free content in the play store. Anything about psychedelic research for mental health... psilocybin, Ketamine, MDMA...
YouTube YouTube YouTube...I find more help on YouTube than any other source.
My husband went through a benzo withdrawal after only several months of being on Xanax.
I experienced a similar withdrawal prior to my first spinal fusion. I was perscribed tramadol as an opioid alternative in 2016. I took it for about 4-5 weeks before surgery at about 1/2 the recommended doses per day. A week or so before major surgery you have to stop taking the majority of your Rx meds. I was thrown into FULL WITHDRAWAL symptoms! Tremors, sweating, couldn't stop SNEEZING, couldn't sit still, felt like i was climbing the walls. Had to take scalding hot baths to even get any sleep. It was WAYYY WORSE that methamphetamine withdrawal, not even debatable!! It was that BAD! I swore from that point forward id NEVER take painkillers or opioids again to the point of physical dependency...and I haven't.
My TWO level neck fusion last April 15 I stopped taking hydrocodone about 5 days after surgery. I'd rather deal with the physical pain short term than suffer the neverending side effects and dependency of 💊 pills. Yes the pain really SUCKS but the trauma of withdrawal isn't worth it to me.
I use medical marijuana daily for everything that ails me....Metal health and physical health. That's been my saving grace as far as meds go.
YouTube has also been my savior. I cannot believe how much info and content is available for free to teach yourself ANYTHING, really! I'm so happy when i find someone else that has found their own personal path through self education and knowledge.
Once I realized that the medical field only supplies the superficial scaffolding for self discovery and the rest is up to each individual patient to pick up the gauntlet and advocate heavily for THEMSELVES to achieve healing from within, not from outside sources or pills or other people, that's when I finally began to make progress on healing Me. Sometimes when we feel most alone, that's the biggest catalyst to initiate our journey back to humanity.
I too have plenty of childhood trauma and MANY other related issues to untreated mental health. I'm almost 49 and helping others has helped me heal tremendously.
I've survived...
1 childhood sexual abuse from age 3
2 Substance abuse and addiction to meth, coke and cigarettes
3 Treatment Resistant Depression
4 General Anxiety Disorder &Panic attacks
5 PTSD
5 Borderline disordered eating and body dysmorphia
6 Four spine fusions in my neck and lower back and a spinal cord stimulator implant because I cannot take Rx pain meds or OTC pills because they make me sick and having no gallbladder is a problem for me eating MANY foods. If I don't adhere to a strict primarily whole foods organic diet I suffer horrible digestive issues. I splurged on Easter candy last week and paid with 7 days of diarrhea bloating and nausea. No kidding....a WHOLE WEEK.
7 both shoulders surgically reconstructed
8 gallbladder removed
9 obesity
10 ADHD
11 abandoned at birth, adopted at 5 months from Korea to Minnesota in 1975
Your Drs sound incompetent and after open heart surgery you need extensive post op care and rehab. My Dad went through this in 2015... almost died in our living room from widow maker heart attack. But he's going to be 86 next month and has a pacemaker and only half his heart is functional. His recovery and medical attention required months of therapy and Drs appointments to get him back on his feet.
Your situation sounds like total and complete neglect. Have you gotten any legal advice or consultation?
Wow! You have been through the ringer. I don't think how you deal with your pain. No I haven't gotten any lawyers involved as I live in Canada and our Dr.s are so well covered that it would just be another stressful and losing battle not to mention that I can't afford it. The other problem is that once you become legal, no Dr. will ever help you again so it damn if I do and damn if I don't. I have written to a few heart foundations and special heart hospitals but have never received a response. Thank you for sharing your story, my heart goes out to you.
Your welcome to come along.
haha your coming arent you 😁
Hate my toxic relationship
Stuck in a toxic relationship
What does Toxic person mean?
I think that its good to distance yourself from toxic people👻💀👻💀👻💀🙏
Toxic Positivity: What do you guys think about this? 
