Crashing Down

[StruggleBusSAHM]

I was talking to my husband last night about his job. He is currently opening a new store with his company. It is exciting, nerve wrecking, and he gets to be part of every process. Before a I was a STAHM I did the same thing for work. Now I am watching from the sidelines and don’t know how to handle it. I miss working. I miss being part of a team and the driving force pushing others to their potential. It’s moments like this when I feel my value plummet and I have to spend the next few weeks trying to pull myself up. I am very proud of my husband and feel guilty but in that moment of realization I just felt like an extra in his story with no value.

[liquidglass]

Are you retired? What are things/ activities you do to give your life purpose?

[StruggleBusSAHM in reply to liquidglass]

I’m a homemaker I stopped working in August so we could move for his job. I normally spend the day doing things around the house with our baby.

[Forestina]

He would not be able to do what he does without your support.

[hypercat54]

Well you know what they say - behind every great man is a great woman! You are doing your bit by looking after your baby leaving him free to devote his time to his job so you are a team.

It won't be forever you know as babies grow up fast. If you can afford childcare maybe you could return to work at least part time? Or he could if you earned more! x

[liquidglass]

"The hardest Job in the world is being a homemaker". These were the exact words that my father said to me yesterday.

I want you to know the value in what you do. It may seem invaluable because of the way society has portrayed women's role in the past, but raising a healthy happy baby who grows up in a household where they feel safe and nurtured is priceless. If you don't find as much fulfillment in this as you once did, you could take up some useful hobbies like sewing clothes for your baby or making pillowcases. You could go on runs with your baby in the stroller (not sure where you live but people do it all the time in the city). You could gear your focus towards fitness and join a gym that has childcare. One thing that has helped me is doing one thing every week that is completely for myself. Going out to coffee with a friend, going on a long run, a hike, binge watching my favorite TV show...

[StruggleBusSAHM in reply to liquidglass]

Thank you that’s helpful I’ll try something tomorrow.