Definitely off topic so apologies beforehand. Again I am watching people having their hair dyed and so on who say they can’t afford to feed their children. My wife and I went without to feed our children now in their fifties. My wife’s friends used to get together to do each other’s hair - in those days the beehive was on trend. I gave up smoking and did lots of extra jobs after work or before work to enable us to stay in our own home and feed ourselves. Such different attitudes and priorities maybe. I suppose no o sis right.
Weird World. Is it me? Was I wrong? - Atrial Fibrillati...
Weird World. Is it me? Was I wrong?
Written by
Desanthony
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BobDVolunteer
When we had our boys we took a decision to be poor and my wife gave up work to bring them up. Repaid 10k fold.
Bob unless you have been a stay at home parent you have NO idea what a gem you have there.
Unfortunately the father of my children refused to stay at home, I really tried to persuade. Interesting then that both my sons want to be at stay at home parents, unfortunately because of lack of pay equality, their earning capacity is much bigger and their wives also want to stay home! The workplace is not a nice environment these days.
Yes my wife stayed at home too until both boys were in junior school and then took a part time job. We were so poor compared to people of today but we enjoyed life and appreciated a day trip to the beach and our very first holiday abroad.
You are so right. Some newly weds today expect to have all the latest gadgets when they get their own home, a huge flat screen tv, modern car, mobile phones etc. We didn't even have a home phone until the mid 1970's.All we had new in our first home was a kitchen table and chairs, cooker and bed. A neighbour gave us one of those old square shaped tv's and we were delighted with it. Then after having 2 daughters and moving house, my husband did a pools round and I worked a few evenings a week at a gift shop. We also took in foreign students. Our children and their needs were our priority and life revolved around them. I think we were more aware that if we wanted extras in life, we had to work in order to get them.
Despite this young people today call us baby boomers and think we had it all. Huh!
Jean
We might have been poor us ‘baby boomers’ but I think we have been a very lucky generation. Yes we had post war food restrictions and we had to cycle or walk everywhere but that made us healthy. We weren't bombarded by a powerful food industry cajoling us to buy instant this and that. We weren’t glued to electronic devices, so had to use our imaginations and play outside as much ad we wanted to. And think of the cheap travel we enjoyed until recently.
All in all, apart from the inevitable consequences of the age we now are, I think we had the best upbringing possible.
Yes, I agree with you.
I lived till the age of 7 in a two up two down with no bathroom or inside toilet. I remember all my childhood and teenage years waking up in the winter to frost on the inside of the windows because the houses I lived in had one coal fire in the sitting room. This was standard for the majority of the population. I was in my thirties before having the "luxury" of central heating. We were not poor in that we had enough to eat and were properly clothed and we never felt poor either but by today's standards maybe we were!
I agree. We saw an item on TV this morning with a hairdresser saying the clients she sees cant afford food for their kiddies. My husband and I looked at each other and then up at the sky. The irony was totally lost on her. Priorities back to front or what.
They could probably afford it if they did not expect to buy it ready made off a shelf in the supermarket. The “I have no money” cry usually comes from people who have sadly never been taught how to cook. It is a huge problem and only the government can address it by bringing back cookery lessons in schools. We called it D.S. - domestic science and I will always be able to rustle up something from not much at all.
I remember looking forward to DS lessons, I was interested in the cookery but first we had to learn how to wash, starch, iron items, then general house cleaning ect before we got to do any cooking! We also had sewing lessons (these were separate) learned how to darn, smocking, lots of different stiches, taking up hems ect and knitting. All this seems to be lost now.
Oh yes! now it’s all Food Technology.
I can’t say I ever enjoyed learning how to clean flock wallpaper with stale bread and antique lace with potato starch - no - don’t think I ever needed to do either but you never know and we got a wide range of skills to equip us to stay at home and keep house. Is it better now? I think the crafts some young people do now are amazing and I wish I’d had the choices young people now have and not had to lie about being married to keep my job and all the other inequalities that existed then.
We used to be taught Home Economics in school; now they teach CRT. The young here (US) rely on GrubHub to get fed. Pathetic.
What is CRT? Something unconnected with food, I assume?
No, totally unrelated to food -- more like politically correct jargon.
Such a weird, topsy turvy value world these days.
The one that gets me is people who say health travel insurance is too expensive - but they are prepared to pay for an expensive holiday and expect the taxpayers of the country they visit to pick up the bill.
I have this same conversation with a friend who’s always saying how rough it is to raise a family today. My parents grew up during the depression and stressed the value of hard work and how poor they were then. They made their own clothes, grew their own vegetable and cooked at home. People today feel entitled to everything. Not sure if it’s the parents, the Govt or both.
You have kids and give them food, clothing and love with a few extras thrown in IF you have the money. You don’t need to give your 10 year old a $1,000 phone or an expensive tv or laptop. And you don’t need to buy an 80k car to get to work, unless you DO have the cash.
When my daughters partner left her with two kids to look after, he took the family car. I arranged to buy her a new Citroën C1 (other models are available) and paid for three years servicing and breakdown cover. Its a great little car for ferrying the kids around and with the price of petrol ⛽ now, it seemed like a good purchase.The new boyfriend suggested I could get a second hand Audi for a similar price to which he was politely (?) told to mind his own business . The idea of buying a new car was to give her three years cost free motoring before the MOT was due.
I was taught never to look a gift horse in the mouth 👄 and remember my Dad giving me £500 to buy a car when I fell on hard times.
The "new" boyfriend has lasted the course and we get along OK now he realises I'm not a push over !!
The whole threat has become judgemental. A lot of people can’t afford for parents to stay at home . We brought up 4 kids and my wife ( qualified nurse) worked part time. However, we never know personal circumstances. Have we become old “ farts” with time to spend on forums . Lol
Yes I am not saying this is true of everyone but us is ironic to see people spending money on themselves whilst grumbling about not having enough money to feed their children it was just something that never entered our heads back in those days.
If you’ve ever watched grandpa on Only Fools and Horses“ back in the war “
🤣. Yep. That’s me!
Well how right you are, my mother was a stay at home one to bring up my older sister and myself. Unfortunately my father died at 49 when I was sixteen, so my Mom, bless her, went and found a job at the local hospital as the Almoner, or today probably called a fancy name. She was also a good cook, so no prepared meals but oh boy fish and chips on a Friday night was a real treat. Only problem was mom used to boil sprouts !!!!!!! ugh
My wife and daughter are both excellent cooks and we do eat well as they can turn contents of the fridge and freezer into a meal set for royalty.
Last comment I can remember as a youngster sitting on my Grandads knee helping him to his favourite Saturday evening 'Pigs Trotters' oh what golden days they were, even with the hardship about. Good neighbours too made all the difference.
Dave
We followed Bob's route and coped. I also retrained to be a teacher and went to uni during that time which really did make life hard for four years. thanks to my lovely and most resourceful wife, we coped. Happy days.
Steve
When The Housewives of Blah and The Only Way is Essex are considered worthwhile viewing, that tells you where many peoples priorities lie, and what influences their thinking. It's shocking sometimes to see but there are many many decent caring people out there - they just don't make it on the TV. Negativity gets far more viewings.
Dare I pop up to say yes completely off topic? Why ? It would need a sociological essay to answer properly.
belindalore• in reply to
Sometimes it's nice to go off topic. It's a way to take the mind off the health problems we all deal with day in and day out. 😔
• in reply tobelindalore
Nice for some less so for others (me!) and squillions of other sites to let off steam / go off on topics.
On a more reflective note - Directed to all contributors of this thread
Whilst I agree the values expressed appear distorted, there has always been peer pressure in society to ‘Keep up with the Jones’, to acquire and to have the latest gadget. I remember my Uncle returning from work with a Biro - the latest gadget of the day - having paid a then ridiculous amount for something that now costs pennies. He was delighted with himself and we were all agog as to what it did and how it worked!
We don’t see the pressures in younger people of what is important because thankfully most have never been hungry, or had no shoes to walk to school in etc etc. because for the baby boomer generation the pressures were more about surviving than thriving.
BUT - I think we are returning to those times and my concern is unfortunately, many who have known only the good life and not been taught the skills required to make healthy food stretch and grow veg and make their own clothes and recycle and up cycle and always want everything new, really will suffer in this world of have and have nots where too few have too much and too many have too little.
Bob is spot on - love and happiness needs to be the currency with which we value our well being.
Did anyone see Grayson’s Art Club on Love - 😍
Hey CD… I would generally agree with you, other than, even the ‘have nots’ have got far too much and have done nothing to earn those things.
BOO BAAH.
We will agree to differ there……
Nothing wrong with ‘agreeing to differ’ …provided that the bottom line is, that I’m right and you’re wrong 🤪
😱 isn’t that t’other way around?☺️
Well you could possibly be right CD but unfortunately you’re not…Keep studying and experiencing life in general and you’ll get there my friend. 🧐
Interesting to read the posts. They confirm conversations between myself and my husband about how the world has gone mad. I remember meeting my husband and the young kids in the car park after my night shift so we could swap the kids over for him to get to work and for me to take them back home and try and get a bit of sleep 😂. We’ve still got a second hand set of draws we bought when we got married 37yrs ago. It’s going strong. Some today want everything new and have an expectation that they are entitled to everything that others have. Our work/save mind set though is having to change as I’ll be finishing work due to them not finding anything suitable for my health issues ( after 42yrs in nhs). That mind set has stood us in good stead for me to be able to do so but switching off that mind set will be different. Fortunately there’s plenty of things out there that imply it’s okay and I can have it all 😂😂😂.
Hey Des… Totally see your point. Spending god knows how much money on hair doos, finger nails, eye lashes, tattoos and lashings of food, to keep the body weight UP. What used to be an absolute luxury, has now become a necessity in most people’s eyes…Ahh take me back to the old days, when a real treat was to have toilet rolls at Xmas, instead of News Of The World, or similar ‼️‼️
And, not to mention tattoos - don’t get me started!
Yes Tricia…What will happen when these people develop skin problems and doctors need to look at and analyse problematic areas. I’m just thinking of my current condition… leg discolouration, due to health issues that I have❓❓
Don’t get me started……. Have you seen all the tattoos they have these days as well? They cost more than a haircut! 😡🤬
Yes Suzi…That would be the price of a tattoo, one sq cm in size. Allegedly ‼️‼️
😳😖
Well, “the more things change the more they remain the same.Multi-colour hair dye? Lazy kids these days? No morals or drive to knuckle down and succeed or contribute? Ya, I’m 67 and remember my parents and their friends sitting around and worrying about the future of humanity.
We turned out fine despite our long hair “crazy music” rebellious lazy ways.
Every generation sees their kids through a different lens.
“The children now love luxury; they show disrespect for elders and love chatter in place of exercise. Children are tyrants, not servants of the households. They no longer rise when their elders enter the room. They contradict their parents, chatter before company, gobble up dainties at the table, cross their legs, and tyrannize over their teachers.“
Kenneth John Freeman...during his Cambridge dissertation in 1907.
“I believe what really happens in history is this: the old man is always wrong; and the young people are always wrong about what is wrong with him. The practical form it takes is this: that, while the old man may stand by some stupid custom, the young man always attacks it with some theory that turns out to be equally stupid."
GK Chesterton
“The world is passing through troublous times. The young people of today think of nothing but themselves. They have no reverence for parents or old age. They are impatient of all restraint. They talk as if they knew everything, and what passes for wisdom with us is foolishness with them. As for the girls, they are forward, immodest and unladylike in speech, behavior and dress."
Peter the Hermit 1274
And yes, even Aristotle notes ancient teens were a disrespectful surly lot...
“They [Young People] have exalted notions, because they have not been humbled by life or learned its necessary limitations; moreover, their hopeful disposition makes them think themselves equal to great things -- and that means having exalted notions. They would always rather do noble deeds than useful ones: Their lives are regulated more by moral feeling than by reasoning -- all their mistakes are in the direction of doing things excessively and vehemently. They overdo everything -- they love too much, hate too much, and the same with everything else.”
Finally, after retiring from the military, I took a casual gig at our local University. I had some apprehension as to the future of mankind. After many years, I left with a calm reassurance that the world was in good hands. 🙂
It’s the “bad” ones that make the news. One never hears of the toil and accomplishments of the majority.
I love the stuff my children and grandchildren do! 2 have had great experiences in army cadets and the others are doing outstanding stuff!
Me too, I have 4 GGchildren, yes under 7 but I have nothing but admiration for my 2 grand kids and their partners, their workloads are amazing and we have been lucky enough to share and help in the little ones. I have nothing but praise for the young ones. I was a good mum as well but as it was going back I didn't "work" and these guys are working as well as doing all the other things that makes a happy family. Lets not knock them, they deserve a pat on the back.
I sometimes think we of the older generations put too much blame on to the younger generations for their lifestyles and choices. As so many here have said ,we didn't have much when we were young, however I do think that we tried to give our children some of the small luxuries that we didn't have. Match that up with the constant bombardment our youngsters get for must have toys,clothes, technology etc,etc and its small wonder that some become desperate to acquire stuff. There are loan sharks out there feasting on this too.There are a lot of young people trying to do a lot of good in the world against great odds at the moment. I feel somewhat guilty that we happily trecked through our lives without a thought of the damage we were doing to our world and will be leaving such a mess for our younger generations to sort out. Maybe we should have more on the school curriculum regarding how to deal with financial matters ie savings,pensions, expenditure and more.
As a working single Mum for some years with not much cash to spare,I did always treat myself to nice face cream to try stop the wrinkles in later life, it worked a bit too, or I kid myself! but it made me feel good. Lets celebrate and not berate our young ones.
I decided to give up a good paying job when my daughter was born and after a year located a poor paying but needed part time job. However, I was very lucky that my mother in law loved to babysit....and refused to take any money. So I never had to worry about my daughter. I agree nowadays younger people seem to waste money on frivolous things however now in US real estate prices are unreal. This has affected renters also. My daughter's rent just went up $300 per month! Unheard of until now. Many young couples are now trapped - housing prices have gone up extremely high and now people can't afford to buy homes and landlords are raising rents higher than I have ever seen. Even though I own a home I am hoping prices come down as they have gone up way too high. So in this respect young people are having it tough right now at least in my area of Florida.
Yes. I'm in Florida. Things are getting tough. And the feds are raising the interest rates on mortgages and car loans. Making it even tougher for most to buy a home or car. I foresee a lot of evictions for renters. Groceries going up and up. I bought a family sized bottle of Dawn dish soap and the bottle is smaller. Then when I used the soap, it doesn't suds as well as it did. So the formula changed. Plus some fresh fish may disappear because gas is too high for the fishing industry to take out their boats. And it will keep getting worse. 😬 Tough for people like me on SS. Take care and be safe.
Yes I agree totally. I'm in the Tampa Bay area. And they are calling it shrinkflation....when they charge the same but packaging is smaller or less product is in bag/box.
HiWell we scrimped and saved and got into our new 2-storey hiome when I was 23 years, Hubby had section and I had saved money. Then we saved together. The bed was an old 2nd hand mattress, the fridge was tiny and our table was a cabin trunk!
I have 1 child who is again saving for a home and other spend on brunch and coffee with meals out.
The thing is if they only gain a first small house they are indeed on the home ladder of owning their own home.
Now I guess they are waiting for me to pass this world!
Um I've thught about it....!!!
Life is for striving. Gaining a challenge and succeeding in life.
Otherwise its like stealing other peoples cars, property etc.
My forever car was stolen on 10/02 scumbags. Sadly it was written off by insurance.
cheri
AF is just another thing I strive to cope with, along with the remaining challenges of stroke - I'm knitting1!! And pill popping to keep me alive re thyroid cancer.
There's a TV ad here in the USA that advertises an organization wanting donations to feed and give food for hungry children. It pans to a mother saying no one's kids should have to be hungry. (She apparently is one mother who has trouble affording food for her two children). Yet her hair is done. Has nice makeup and nails are done. What happened to the USA was allowing people to receive welfare checks for a life time. Welfare was supposed to be a temporary financial support when some one fell on hard times. But once again the wonderful politicians allowed it to be permanent support for generations of families. My family had to go on welfare a couple times when I was little and nothing hurt my father's pride more. He worked construction and in those days no one worked in the winter months. So a couple times things got tough for our family of six. Dad had a slight disability from an injury (his left arm shook sometimes) and it was hard for him to find other work. In those days if you had any physical disability you were considered mentally disabled too. 🙄 Which my father wasn't. He was unfairly discriminated against. He worked hard for his family. Some of the young people today who call us boomers don't know how good they have it. And I bet if most of them had to learn survival skills, they wouldn't even be able to plant a garden. Well I know someone who calls those young people (who call us boomers) millennial stooges. My father and mother raised us up in the country. We had a garden every year. Chickens. And an outhouse. Which came in handy when tree roots grew into and plugged up the sewer line. Sure was cold in the winter.😬 But we had what we needed.
You all take care and be safe.
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